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I don't want this to be a pity party but I worked out today it's been well over a year since a friend actually came to see me. The phrase 'out of sight, out of mind' is practically created for this disease. I have never had loads of friends but 5/6 really close ones but it seems as if the longer this goes on the more they fade away.
I have played high level sport all my life until this illness robbed me of everything and it's really hard not being part of a team anymore and even harder that I can't exercise to help the anxiety/depression.
Not sure there was a point to this post just wanted to get it off my chest.
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Hi Linesy. That's really tough and I feel for you. We don't realise how much friendship is related for what we do for one another, and once you can no longer do stuff for others, you fall out of the friendship loop. Added to this people's lives just seem to get busier and busier. When I realised how isolated I had become I decided to be direct and told friends I wanted to hear how things were going in their lives and could they pop in for a short visit, just a half hour with a cup of tea.
Wishing you the best.
Linesy--I could have written your post, even down to the 5 or 6 close friends. These are very long-term friends--for over 50 years. One friend was like a sister to me. I actually phoned her last year (even getting on the phone is difficult for me), told her I missed her, and asked her if she would come for a visit. She never came. The phrase "out of sight, out of mind," apparently very well describes my situation. Not only that, but these friends were all close to my 97-year-old mother, who feels bad that they haven't called her, either. I sent an email to these friends, not even mentioning my illness again, but the fact that Mom misses them. Only 1 out of the 5 then phoned her. I also know how frustrating it can be not to be able to exercise to help deal with anxiety or depression. I did find that meditation helped greatly with this, and helped in general for me to cope with this illness.
hi there my 1st post.
I have suffered with cfs for 8 years now. and your right after about a year or so everyone drops away.
I sometimes blame myself a bit as when some say "pop over on sunday" and on sunday im like i cant move and cancel. Feels like they just get fed up of asking. Some just dont bother.
Out of site out of mind is a good desciption.
Hope you have family that supports you.
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