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I’m 18 years old. I’ve been suffering with depression for around 3 years. I take antidepressants and they don’t help. I just feel like I have been observing life in 3rd person for some time now. I sit back and watch the world unfold around me as i slip deeper and deeper into myself. I don’t have the energy to get out of bed or eat some days. I don’t have the guts to hurt the people around me by killing myself, but i just wish someone would kill me. I don’t wanna be alive anymore. I feel so empty and distant all the time. I sleep all the time. It feels like my body knows it hurts less when I’m not awake. I don’t know if I’ll ever get any better. i just wanna lie down doing nothing but stare at the wall. My doctor doesn’t take me seriously and blames my problems on my drug use, which is simply a symptom of this problem. I just wanna fade away and dissolve. I am becoming more and more distant from friends and family. I’m sick of having to try so hard just to be awake and conscious. Living and breathing is such a great effort at the moment.
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