I’m depressed and feel so alone
Posted , 7 users are following.
hey, im new to this and im not sure if it will help but basically i feel so alone i mean i havent had a great time the last few years and im not sure if im depressed but i never want to leave my bed, i either cant eat or i eat to much, i spend most of my time crying and hurting, i always feel sick, i get sore pains in my chest and i have nobody to talk to. My boyfriend makes me feel like nothing because he is always lying to me and hurting me and i feel worthless to him, i sat in my room crying for hours today about feeling alone and wishing i could change, i just feel like im nothing anymore and i have been cheated in different relationships 3 times, i was also raped and ive never talked to anyone about any of this and i just need some advice on what to do
1 like, 12 replies
sophia93180 karli57340
Posted
Hey Karl,
The things you described sound pretty much like depression. I am sorry to hear that you felt so lonely and hurt, but don't give up life.
You maybe feel alone and isolated, but you are a precious person and you will find the people and will make you feel better!
I would recommend going to the therapist and maybe in a mental health facility, because they know how to treat depression and they can really 'solve' some deeper laying issues.
Your boyfriend seems to be the opposite of what you need and what you deserve, so consider breaking up with him..
I have been there too and I know it's easier said than done but you will overcome this crisis and you feel better eventually.
karli57340 sophia93180
Posted
that message is really what i needed, i fond it hard to know wher to start looking for the help especially since my family dont listen very and im not sure where to start, i wish my boyfriend would take a minute and actually listen to me, understand why im here, he doesnt even understand depression at all and i just wish for 5 mins he would stop and actually realise how sick i am, but thankyou alot
hypercat karli57340
Posted
Well the first thing I would do is get yourself to the doctors and get a diagnosis and some help. When you are feeling a bit better then the second thing I would do is get your lying hurting bf out of your life! You deserve better than this but you have to start believing this and take your power back.
I have been raped too and it's horrible but the worst thing you can do is suffer in silence. You can bury painful feelings and emotions but they don't go away and come back to bite you unless you deal with it. Start dealing with your issues for the sake of your future. x
karli57340 hypercat
Posted
I will go to the doctors im just scared, my family dont really believe mental health issues are real and they make me feel bad for talking about it, its hard to leave him, it breaks my heart because he was never like this before and im so in love but i dont know.
what did u do when it happened because it happened over 2 years ago and i still have bad dreams and still get scared being alone and i have never spoke about it except here or with my boyfriend and i dont know how to deal with it because when i texted him about it he denied ever doing it when i know it happened but thankyou for your advice it really means alot x
hypercat karli57340
Posted
You mean your current bf raped you?
karli57340 hypercat
Posted
oh no sorry, reading that back it is confusing but i meant the only person i have told is my current boyfriend but when i texted the person who raped me he denied everything x
katehippy karli57340
Posted
Karli, I just wanted to say that you ARE worth it, and DO deserve help! We get stuck in the thought that we're not worth the effort, or worth listening to, but seriously that is why there are professionals out there to help! Our partners and family may NEVER understand, and it makes things so much worse.... The isolation and overthinking keeps on growing the less we're able to talk about stuff! Please pick up the phone and get an appointment with your healthcare practitioner, and when you get there be HONEST and don't try to be brave like you have been doing all this time xxx
karli57340 katehippy
Posted
thankyou i really appreciate that and yes it just leaves me feeling lonely but im going to make an appointment on monday but i dont feel brave so thankyou for the encouragement xx
sam18386 karli57340
Posted
oh karl, your story is heartwrenching. you poor man, 1 thing stood please insist on getting some help for being raped, it might help with some of your emotional issues. have you contacted rape crisis? also ask your doctor for counselling with the other issue. you need to find a girlfriend who loves you for you and accept you regardless of your past. i wish you luck let us know how you get on.x
karli57340 sam18386
Posted
i am going to make an appointment on monday morning, and no i have never really looked into what to do or who to contact and that is part of the reason why i came here? what is that and how does it help? Thankyou so much x
sam18386 karli57340
Posted
hi karl, well done for being brave and making an appointment with your doctor
when you see them tell us what you did on here, especially about your girlfriend. don't hold off telling your doctor anythinng. rape crisis are an organisation that deal with rape persistently. i wish you massive amounts of luck.
wayne1962 karli57340
Posted
Hi karli57340 - an uncaring boyfriend who lies to you and hurts you, cheating exes, raped and they got away with it. I'm not surprised your diet wavers, that you cry and are hurt, that there are pains and you don't want to leave the safety of your bed. Here's what you do:
1 - GET ANGRY
2 - use that rage to forge a new future
3 - make an appointment to see the doc - write down what is happening and present that if you are unable to articulate the issues. The doc may prescribe anti-depressants which will take 3-6 weeks to work. you must use them as instructed. There will be an adjustment period.
4 - ask for a referral to a psychologist/therapist or counsellor where you can unburden in a safe, non-judgemental environment with a professional who will help guide you. Give yourself time to get used to that counsellor. You can't rush these things - it will take as long as it takes.
5 - GET RID OF THE "BOYFRIEND." You have stated that you have been cheated on by three former partners. this indicates you are making bad choices, and those choices are directly linked to your low self esteem. Until we understand why, we cannot address the issue.
6 - GET RID OF THE "BOYFRIEND." You will not progress in that dynamic, and, if my experience in these matters are anything to go by, he may well abuse and block any attempt you make to address these issues. He will lose control of you if you persist, and it sounds like he needs someone to condescend to. It's infinitely better to be "alone" than tied to a pig.
7 - Understand that this is a life change - it's for life. For your future. It will be difficult because you will have to change the fundamental way in which you view yourself - but that's one of our jobs in this life, to understand who we are, to become our own best friend, and to stand up proud and loud for your fundamental right to be treated with respect.
Go for it. It will be the most valuable thing you ever do. It will change your life.