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I'm not happy anymore

Posted , 5 users are following.

katie52188
katie52188

I wouldn't say it's come on just recently but it has been building up and currently has got increasingly worse. I don't really know how to describe the emotion I'm experiencing, sometimes it's upset, or scared, or loneliness or just a numb feeling but it's not always constant. What is constant however is just not being happy there's live this void that never used to be there.

I'm currently 16 and whilst I know this is probably all hormonal I need to talk to someone whether it be anonymous or not. I'm half way through my GCSEs  and I don't believe this to be stress induced as I'm not particularly stressed at the moment. I'm not happy at my current school or my current location but I put that aside as I was meant to be moving out of the county during the summer, I've know this for a couple of years. At first I was devestated about the news but I began to accept it and as I became unhappy I sort of placed hope in the fact that getting out of this awful place would give me a chance at happiness.

However the thing that the move relied on fell through but I was told that we'd still be moving. Recently it has come to my attention that we won't, and although I kind of knew for a while that we wouldn't that chance if happiness has been shattered. I'm scared. I haven't been accepted by any schools and I CAN'T stay at my current school. I don't think being chucked into any school that is willing to take me will do me any good. 

I've had a few things going on at home recently and they often result in fights with my mum. Whilst I know this a normal thing for any teenage girl to fight with their mum the most recent argument resulted in her saying that I'm not her daughter she doesn't care if were related by blood that she wants nothing to do with me. And whilst a whole chunk of me wants to blame the way I'm feeling on that I know it's not true. 

I have told people how I felt but I blamed it on everything at home and exaggerated stuff at home a bit. I always wondered why I did that but I know now it's because I wanted there to be a reason for how I'm feeling and make people understand and on some sense try and understand myself. But I now know that I can't pin point an exagpct trigger for this void.

i don't really know what I'm trying to ask but I guess I need to talk to someone  even if I don't know who I'm talking to. If anyone has any advice please respond I just need to know I'm not on my own.

2 likes, 15 replies

15 Replies

  • joan152
    joan152 katie52188

    Posted

    Hi,Katie,

    I think you need to talk to somebody,

    To think that at 16 it is normal to fight with your mother or any age fills me with horror

    can you blame your mum at the moment for not wanting to know you,I don't know all the details and don't wish to but to be fighting with your mother just is not right,I suggest you go to your GP or a counsellor perhaps somebody at school you certainly need help..

    Good Luck

    • Vickycam
      Vickycam joan152

      Posted

      I'm quite surprised at your rather harsh response to Katie.  Many  mothers tell me they often have arguments  with their children.  I don't see the "horror" in that.  Of course I'm assuming that Katie is not cursing her mother out or being violent.  For any mother (who is the adult in this situation) to speak so cruelly to her child is the real horror. Katie  needs professional help from a compassionate professional not criticism from strangers.  Your suggestions for Katie to see her GP or a counselor are good ones.  I hope she follows that advice.
    • katie52188
      katie52188 Vickycam

      Posted

      Thank you, no I didn't curse my mother I had a diffucult day at school and when I tried to confide in her, me being a state and her being in a mood things escalated and she kicked me out, I returned about 5 hours later to find her lying down in the bathroom I tried to speak with her but she refused so I stood in front of the door which caused her to push me against the sink and yell at me which is when she said what she said
    • Vickycam
      Vickycam katie52188

      Posted

      Dear Katie,  I'm sorry you are having these difficulties with your mother.  Mom's get tired and sometimes they  take their fatique and impatience  out on their children.  I'm a mom and I know.  I have two sons - they are almost middle aged - and over the years we have had our diagreements but as they matured they and I have built up real great friendships between us. Please forgive your mother and in time you and she can be friends again. Please talk to a kind and competent counselor or doctor to get you through  this time in your young life.  Brighter days will come and I hope soon for you.  Keep telling yourself that you're a good person and that you will live up to your potential.  

      .  

    • joan152
      joan152 Vickycam

      Posted

      If that came as harsh well we all see things different as I said don't know the facts don't and none of us do on here ,it was not criticism and if I could help I would ,but to argue yes not fight with parents that gets no where.hope the family gets the help they need.
    • joan152
      joan152 Vickycam

      Posted

      Just to add if my post was harsh or offensive Iam sure it will be deleated.

      The last thing on a forum like this is for upsets which never would I do.

      And if you post on here you will get opinions,and the person who thinks it harsh should respond.

      Not another stranger.

       

    • patricia85842
      patricia85842 Vickycam

      Posted

      Well said Vickycam!  I couldn't believe what I was reading when Joan said it wasn't normal for teenage girls to fight with their mother..I think it's the other way round.  If anyone is in the wrong I would say it was the mother.  What a horrible cruel woman.
    • joan152
      joan152 patricia85842

      Posted

      OK

      I retract what I said just it's not what I have ever come across,I will not comment any more ,and find I will leave the forum

      sorry to my friends.

      bye

    • abraham62199
      abraham62199 joan152

      Posted

      Joan, dont leave, we all say things we think on reflection we were wrong. Whats been did has now been hid. Sit down and take a deep breath, dont hate yourself, I get like this a lot. Dont make rash descisions. Please Joan dont hurt yourself. We all have got be strong. You can do it girl.
    • patricia85842
      patricia85842 joan152

      Posted

      Sorry Joan I guess it was me being harsh but I just couldn't believe that you haven't heard of mums and teenage girls.  I had problems getting on with my teenage daughter but it didn't last.  My 8 year old grandaughter is starting already with her mum and most of my friends had the same poblems with daughters.  It doesn't seem to happen with boys.  Anyway I am sorry so please don't leave the forum.

      Pat

    • joan152
      joan152 patricia85842

      Posted

      Believe me I have heard of teenagers and mums I have a 16 year old Grandaughter ,yes teenagers are teenagers but  to fight no don't understand argue yes.Sorry have nieces also and perhaps lucky or what but never come across this and as I am being the culprit I stick by what I said and have left.

       

    • katie52188
      katie52188 joan152

      Posted

      I think you misunderstood I agree with what you've said I never have and never will raise a hand against my mother.
  • Reggie04
    Reggie04 katie52188

    Posted

    Hi Katie, sounds to me like you have depression". You can feel so many emotions when depressed, I can only speak for myself and how I felt when I was very depressed. I felt so detached and alone as if I was the only person in the world who felt this fearful and unexplainable existence. I also felt such guilt as I did'nt have worries like some? My life was good compared to others who were ok and getting on with their lives.

    I could'nt cope with pretty much everything '. So frightened of the easiest tasks.  Venlafaxine helped me get slowly but surely out of the biggest black hole of my life.,, counselling also helps some people although I am better speaking one to one. And not in a group. See your dr to seek help and advice?

    • katie52188
      katie52188 Reggie04

      Posted

      Thank you for your advice I've decided to speak to my doctor but I'm very scared. I feel like I'm most likely to postpone it until after my exams. Whilst I feel antidepressants may help to a degree I feel Counciling would be best suited for me. But in my mind seeing a doctor, despite being terrifying isn't anywhere as near as petrifying as opening up and disclosing everything to a stranger. How did you talk to your doctor about this? I'm female so is it best that I speak to a doctor of the opposite sex? Should I speak to my regular doctor or one I've never seen before so I don't have to face them again? I don't want my family finding out, I have to cope with this by myself I can only imagine their disappointment 
  • abraham62199
    abraham62199 katie52188

    Posted

    Sorry you are not feeling good Katie, Yes sometimes we dont see eye to eye with our parents and I know the mental torment you can go through, my wife can be a bit heavy on our 15 year old daughter sometimes, especialy if she is in more trouble at school. Myself I listen to my daughter as I had problems when I when I was at school. Try talking to a doctor, that may work if not find someone who Iyou can confide in who is not judgemental. Teachers sometimes are not that good and dont have the respect of the pupils and I feel my daughter is punished as the teacher cant cope. When I have a problem I try and put myself in the other persons shoes that way sometimes they are right and I have to change, lots of the time though it is me that is right so I keep shtum and let them rabbit on, do we need to win, does it hurt to let them get their own way, if we can do that, we are the bigger person. So little person, just take deep breaths and dont think to

    much. If you are still up, have a nice rest, and no thinking as thinking to much can be depressing.

    Goodnight

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