Posted , 3 users are following.
This time last year I was 12 stone 3, I am a 38 year old female and only 5 ft 1 1/2 so was clearly obese.
In february I decided to do something about it and I now weigh 7 stone 10, at a recent check up my doctor told me not to lose any more weight and said that 20 is the lowest a BMI should be and I am very close to it, I thought 18.5 was the lowest but she disagrees.
Now the thing is I do eat but I am very strict about not going over a certain amount of calories and despite the fact that I am still losing weight I can't bring myself to eat any more than that.
I keep promising myself that I wont lose more but I see the scale go down and feel such a buzz that it's like an addiction.
I weigh myself daily, struggle to accept natural fluctations and count every single calorie I eat.
I also feel really pleased with myself if I have calories left from my allowance at the end of the day and don't eat them.
Part of me thinks yes it's a problem but I allow myself an amount that is supposed to be my TDEE and it's 1390 so it's not drastic low although I still lose weight on that so it probably isn't enough and as I said I feel pleased with myself if I am 100-200 under it every day and feel guilty if I eat right up to it.
Then I think it's normal to be scared of getting obese again because I was like it for 8 years and miserable so I just don't know, I'm not sure if I do have an actual problem or if I am just terrified of going back to how I was.
My husband says it's time to stop but I just keep thinking he only sees me as being thin because he is about 10 pounds overweight so to him 'normal' seems very thin.
I feel a bit silly writing this now, I think I am fine and just don't want to risk getting big again but I will post anyway to see what others think, thank you for any opinions.
0 likes, 10 replies