I'm starting to feel as if I'm losing myself, what's happening to me...

Posted , 3 users are following.

Hi guys, I've been comtemplating whether or not I should write this because I don't usually talk about myself. Just to note, I smoke heavily, I used to play football for 4/5 years, though I dont anymore. 

I'm 18 years old (male) and at my first year of University...I am usually a happy, helpful, social and loving person.

After my bumpy past with the law, almost going to prison for over 2 years, I narrowly got let off with probation...this was almost 2 years ago if not longer. During my probation period, I changed myself to side onto my more helpful, loving side. I help everyone that I possibly can and I always show love to people. After a lot of downs since then with very few ups, this is how I am now. 

I am feeling tired, mentally, emotionally and physically. I feel weaker than ever and I cannot eat. I've only had one proper meal in 10 days where the other days I've lived on energy drinks and crisps/sweets. I feel a strong strong pain in my heart and chest often, the pain is undescribable, it hits me when I'm walking, a bit angry or randomly. Ive been feeling this pain for over 7/8 months but never took action on it. I was taken to hospital by my friends at one point some time ago as I couldnt concentrate, i felt weak and my whole body was literally unresponsive. However, the doctors said it was nothing so I carried on with my life. Soon after or before that, my left eyesight was very cloudy, couldnt see much from it at one point for a few hours and the doctors told me to get my eyesight checked as it couldve been very serious. Again, I forgot about this and carried on with my life. 

The heart and chest pain was very regular when I was walking or arguing with someone but wasnt as bad is it is now. The pain would go in a few minutes and my breathing went back to normal short after. However, now the pain has become much more serious...i feel pain in my back, shoulders, neck, arms and at one point my face was feeling very weird. I feel cold but very hot, i constantly get pins and needles, numbness in my legs, arm, hand and toes/feet. At one point I was sleeping for 18/20 hours every day...then it changed to only sleeping for 2 hours and not being able to sleep at all. Now, I fall asleep randomly and just knock out for a couple hours...whether im in lecture or in my bed, i sleep randomly for random stretches of time..

My skin colour has been changing, at times it goes very dark and at times it goes light...

About 2 months ago, I was lying down and I randomly felt a stitch-like pain but much much worse on the right side of my body, just under my ribs. The pain was very tight and painful and kept switching from the right side of my body to the left. I then had a strong pain in my vein in my right arm for about 2 minutes, my heart was racing and my chest was in pain. I was shaking a lot and my temperature was going hot and cold. When the ambulance came, my heart rate was 164 and they estimated it to being much higher earlier when the incident happened at first. They did their ECG and it was just my heart rate that was irregular. 99% oxygen levels and normal blood pressure. They then conducted another ECG when I was taken to the nearby hospital. From then on, the pain has been very common and the symptoms listed above have become more consistent. I have consulted the doctors, they have just taken blood tests and yet another ECG with no irregular results. I still have to take an X-Ray at the hospital to examine my chest/heart...

I am getting mixed answers from the different doctors I see. I understand they are trying to keep me comfortable by not telling me what it actually might bem, but i do not mind...honestly. I have had some doctors say I might have angina, aneamia, thyroids whilst some have even told me cancer. My lecturer has told me to stay away from caffeine as it will just cripple my situation even more...

Please give me your thoughts, no matter what they are...all will be appreciated!! I just want to know what's wrong with me, how serious it might be and how long I have

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7 Replies

  • Posted

    Oh, the doctors have said this may be due to anxiety but I am not sure...after reading other similar posts, I think it might be anxiety but what could i possibly be anxious about??


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  • Posted

    Anxiety isn't always about being anxious about a certain thing. Generalised anxiety is when it's always there even when there isn't anything to necessarily be anxious about. It's jsut how the brain works and we tend to always feel a 'sense of doom' which of course can feel worse when we are actually in a anxious situation.

    A lot of your symptoms are up with anxiety symptoms. Have you had a scan on your heart? There's something called svt which cause irregular heart. I was checked Imfor this when I went to my dr about palpitations 4 years ago. I had ecgs and heart scans. Nothing came back. I took myself to emergency and was told I sound like I have anxoety/postnatal depression. I also felt extremely tired and that was one of my reasons aswel to go to my dr.

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    • Posted

      Thank you Gerogina! 

      I see...so how do i stop being anxious or prevent depression

      I havent had my scan yet, I am trying to find the time to do so. Do you think it's possible that I dont have any health issues but just anxiety?

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    • Posted

      It's hard there is people you can talk to and therapies you can attend. We're told to relax and exercise and eat well to keep energy levels up and release endorfins. There could be well something that is bothering your but you don't know what. Things like that you can talk about in 'therapy' there is different types of 'therapy' for anxoety as it is so complex.

      I do think it could be to do with anxoety and the fact your still being tested is good. Atleast once eveything else is ruled out you can concentrate on it being anxoety and hopefully start to feel better. A big symptom of anxoety is not believing you actually have it and all your symptoms are actually something serious which starts a big cycle. Your only young so I'm sure your fine.

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    • Posted

      I'm not one to really talk about my feelings or to express myself...even writing up my symptoms was really hard. But I will have an assessment with the doctor soon and I'll be able to see what is actually wrong with me...

      Thank you for all your help, wish you all the best!!

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  • Posted

    Hi Adam hope you are alright buddy. I'm 16 and we suffer from the quite same symptoms but my appetite has not been touched although this could progress. I have aches and pains everywhere and have been to the doctor 4 times. I have had an ECG which came back clear. Every little thing I find pain wise in my body I'm actually googling it but Don't do that as that is the worst thing to do. I have kinda just got by it by accepting it. I am under the mind set now that if something is going to go wrong why didn't it start happening before anxiety symptoms started such as feeling weak etc. Your so young and I think of the doctor believed there was something deeply wrong with you they would send you for tests. For your heart beat and being under constant pressure you might want to look at a herbal remedy called Kallms. These help me a lot and they actually do take some of the anxious thoughts away and the aches and strains caused by anxiety. What I have taught myself to is to basically tell my body that you can beat the anxiety so it's like a fight between your body and your mind and your mind will get over such a thing called anxiety. Take a deep breath and say F*** it !! You will he through it and I can reassure you that all of the symptoms you are explaining , pains in chest etc and the one that reassured me lol was the pain under your rib. You just think if your body is all tense up what is that doing to your body ? It's putting it under severe pressure and this is the outcome. Your muscles become sore and you experiencing twitching etc from the most randomist places in your body. I find that listening to relaxation music helps me and just taking deep breaths. The fact that your so young and you have the same symptoms as me I would reassure you , you don't need to worry. If you feel a pain somewhere just take your mind off it by doing something because as soon as you start to think and constantly start to worry about the pain, it will become more visable and it will be there for much longer m. It's a way of your body basically implementing the thought you are thinking. Because most of the things we think about actually do happen but not to the extent of what some of our anxious thoughts are like dying etc. Hope this helps a little. Your not alone. Everyone on this page is super super nice and already I feel better in myself already only 2 weeks into the page. Private message me anytime.


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    • Posted

      Ron! You're only 16 but so so mature and supportive. I've been friends with a lot of people, people of most sorts and never have I come across someone as good as you! It's a shame that we're both on the same boat, but then again, at least WE are on the same boat...I'm getting an assessment done soon and I'll let you know what they say. But keep your head up big man, if you need any help or advice, message me and I'll try my hardest to assist you!!


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