I'm starting to worry....

Posted , 2 users are following.

Had a hip replacement on may 4th so I'm driving now and get around more easily....my next surgery is august 12 and I think I'm getting depressed cause its going to be all over again...and my kids and husband are in another state...i do have my sisters and mom and dad but they have their family to tend too...I feel alone..

0 likes, 21 replies

21 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi Lizzy,

    It is me again, it is not the problem that you have to go through the operation, rehabilation and everything else again, you have experience what it looks like. I know because I have done it. But to be away from the kids, that is the real issue. Try to think that you are going to get better and that you are doing this for them.

    Be brave, and think positive. Give yourself small tasks that you can achieve every day and that will drive you through the days, weeks and then you will be on the door of the hospital to go home. Go on, don't stop and think positive. The time will pass anyway and you should improve yourself during that time.

    Good luck and stay positive

    • Posted

      Hey there friend I'm so happy you wrote back to me, since I'm new to this site or even on chatting on line I couldn't find you to talk..weird on how things work out.. will 5he last time we talked I was having issues on walking but now I use a cane to get around but not for operated leg but for the one that I'm having surgery for on august...it's like I'm use to using the cane..but now I have about 4 weeks before my surgery and I'm feeling scared to have to depend on people....I'm a very positive person but I'm human too I break, I need to talk out what I try to avoid to keep healthy...nice talking to you again...

      Lizzy

    • Posted

      Hi Lizzy,

      try to use next few weeks before the new operation to strengthn your muscles on both legs, to be easier to walk without cane, and also to make your rehab after new operation shorter and easier. I have try that and it is true. Anyway be careful, no sudden moves, you have artificial hip and take care about that. Next few months you will be better and your life will come back.

      Thank God that you have the people that can stand by you and help you. I had similar feeling, I want to do everything by myself, I don't like to depend on somebody, but life is something else. Last few months while I was in bed for 2 weeks, my wife did everything for me, from bathing me in bed, bringing me food and water, to helping me to have toilette in bed, like a baby. I have learned that I have to let people help me if I can not do it alone, and to be greatful for that.

      Let your life show you that you are not an island and that you have people that are here for you, whatever you need.

      Good luck, workout a lot to be strong and ready, and stay positive

       

    • Posted

      Hi friend,

      Your right I hope I don't sound ungrateful, but it's really hard...my dad has been fighting cancer for 4 years now and this past year he had been driven 5 hours every 2 weeks just for chemo...so it's been really hard cause my mom is so stressed and now me again..is why I wish they could get over and done with...but yes, I'm excersing both legs for better recovery...the week I get my surgery my dad needs to go to get chemo 3 days after...I need my mom for at least the first week, I'm afraid she can't and I feel selfish to want her there

      Your friend,

      Lizzy

    • Posted

      Hi Lizzy,

      You are just human. Now you are going through tough times and after this you can only be wiser and stronger. Sorry to hear that your father is ill. It is up to you to workout and do what you have to do including going through the operation. I don't know if you beleive in God, but people have problem to see illnes as a punishment, then they become angry "why me, I was good, etc". This is bad emotion. Try to look as it as a lesson to understand why that happened, and then you will understand what are you made of, are you strong and fighter or you just say sorry I can not fight with it. Also as it is the lesson then there is no anger or bad emotion, but you calmly start to think about it and how to get out from current problem, and what to do to avoid future problems. 

      Here is my example, maybe it would be easier for you to understand what I am talking about. Last year in November I went on a trip with my friends, and I already had bad hips and I had operation scheduled, December. I had done that, then we start planning next trip for October this year. As it includes backpack and hiking 10-15 km per day I knew that I have to be ready and strong for that. February, operation of next hip, after 2 weeks I was walking without a cane, went to place where I had to workout, magnets, swiming pool etc. Nice and then instead of 28 days I was there for 10 days, I thought that I am strong enough. I had to start working (we had some deadlines by the end of April) it was March and April, everything was as I have planned, and then the automatic door hit my leg, it was the first time of partlly dislocated hip (I was so sure that I can do everything as before). Lesson #1 - It is not my hip and I have to be careful. You know my story, but after that I did not went to visit my surgeon or my sport MD, or at least to stay at home for 2 weeks, because it does not work with my plan of recovery to go in October for hikig, and then I had total hip dislocation, and after that I still harry to recover and then problem hit me again 3 weeks ago. Lesson #2 I can not harry my body to heal faster than it is normal, just because I have to ....... So 3 weeks ago I decided to go slow, I don't want to do anything that can lead to hip dislocation.The most important thing, I had said to my friends that I am not going in October. I workout special excersises that my sport MD had given to me, I walk slowly using cane, and every step of left leg I am concentrated to do properly. 

      I expect that if I am careful and excersise a lot by the end of August I can walk without a cane and I can slowlly start with normal life. Lesson #3 I am impatient man, and I have to learn to be patient in my life, I am 56 years old and already operated both hips and heart. I have to take the rest of my life as a man with these issues, I can not pretend as I am 25 and that I can do whatever I want. Still I don't accept my age and the problems, and I am walking near the edge of what are my limits (like I am 50 :-) ), but I am not like before.

      My body told me that I can not compete with boys of 19 in sports, or work all day long like I am 30, I have tried that and I had to operate heart and both hips

      Everybody had their lessons, it might be illnes or that they have to take care about ill person. Think about your lessons and beleive me it would be easier to accept the current situation. By the way after the operation you are in the hospital for how long? Why do you need your mom? 

      Be brave and positive.

      Your friend Milan 

    • Posted

      Hi Milan,

      These pasts days have been crazy...will your right, I do believe in God and I pray almost every night...You are a strong person to have to go 5hrough not just hip surgery but also for your heart..plus a dislocation..I'm sure that was hard but u did it and almost done...I pray for a faster recovery for you, you got this 😉As for my dad will he turned on me and my sister on my nephews birthday party on Saturday with lots of hateful words..made my mom leave with him early in the party..I haven't talked to my dad ever since that day. I had my pre opp on Monday with my dr. and that went will, I'm now ready for my operation in august..your story makes me stronger...I now feel i've been pushing everybody away that has offered to help me to just have my mom and dad back..15 long years that I haven't been in TX year round, I thought my parents would change especially since my dad has cancer..Things don't change...

      Sorry I just need someone to vent with..if you think In any way I sound selfish or rude I would love ur opinion...

      But now have more courage for next surgery and keeping myself busy in a slow paste so that way in December when my babies get here from mn ill be healthy and pain free with God's help..my mom needs to be with my dad, just found out he's visit is on August 12 which is my surgery day..my surgery on may 4th my dad went to he's chemo also that week and he gets lonely alone at home...so ur right...

      I'm strong to do this for healthy recovery for my kids without stress...I will be in the hospital for 5 days then move to the 4th floor in the hospital for inpatient rehab for about 10 days then get to go home and do out patient for 15 days 3 days a week..

      Then I might just go to a gym to still work out slowly...I live alone so I might have a friend stay with me for awhile...

      Hope to hear from you soon

      Your friend lizzy

    • Posted

      Hi Lizzy,

      Thank you for your prays.

      You had your family problems in past, and there was lot of mixed feelings. From these feelings comes illness. Anyway you should try to geather the family and give love a chance. But if somebody does not want to be there for you, it is his/her decission and you should not blame them for that, but turn to people who loves you and love them with all your heart.

      I am trying to understand why you are not in town or area where are your kids and husband. Here in Serbia I was in the hospital in my hometown, so all day long I had visitors: kids, wife, brother, family, friends and I felt like I am at home. 

      Everything would be fine with your operation, don't worry. When you start excersising out of the hospital on your own, just be careful to find the gym that can support you with the proper exercises for hip replacement rehab.

      Don't worry everything will be fine.

      Your friend Milan

    • Posted

      Good morning,

      Wow I guess I didn't pay attention will, so your from Europe....

      I do have mix emotions with my dad that I was trying to fix this summer,but from the looks of it, it's not any different..I feel like I should go over to my dad's and try to talk this out as an adult would...But I can't cause it's too hard to get through my dad without yelling...I saw the anger/hate he had with me that day he blew up...I'm starting to drop it...and move on I'm not stressing over it..

      The reason I'm in Texas is cause the great surgeon is here...I live here but travel to Minnesota with my husband and kids is cause he works there for the months of April to December...I can't care for my kids while in healing alone so we decided for him to take them with...He wants me to go after surgery in October but I'm not sure cause I don't want to push my self to get hurt...what do u think?

      But I don't want to be alone here without my kids any longer...you right who ever shows up is out of their heart...its sad though I'm in my home town but don't feel at home at all....

      Glad to here from you 😀 like talking to you..

      How are your family doing? If you don't mind me asking....

      Your friend,

      Lizzy

    • Posted

      Hi Lizzy,

      I think that you should go to be with your kids and husband as soon as you get strong and stabile on your legs. You have to take care at least by the end of the year, on your moves, walk etc. Be very careful, give your body time to heal. I think that your kids would give you motivation to excersise a lot and to get better and return to your normal life. Talk to your surgeon and ask if you can travel and when can that be safely done.

      I have grownup kids 20+, my son is working with me and daughter is finishing uneversity, next year she will graduate medecine. I have great family and friends. Some of my friends and family offered to come and give blood for me if I need it during the operation, so it tells you who are the people around me. That gives me will to get better and to continue normal life with these people. 

      My surgeon told me that my good health is combination of his part of job and my part of job. If he does not do great job, I can do whatever I want and it won't be good. If he do great job, and I don't finish my part I will never function well. So if your surgeon do great job, everything is on you and your effort to finish the job good. It is easier to do it while you have family around you, for love and support.

      Stay well and go forward with youl life

      Your friend

      Milan

    • Posted

      Hi friend,

      You are blessed to have a wonderful family and loving people around you...As for me I might do that, once I get back on my feet and feel comfortable walking around I'll head up with my family...to heal with their support expecially my 2 yr old turns 3 in October 😊 He needs his mommy..my Dr is a good surgeon and your right it's up to me to finish the good work..never thought of it that way...I haven't been exercising right cause my other leg feels like it's dislocated again..

      Do you think after my other surgery I can get back to normal on both legs the same time or is my leg going g to be stiff from now on...

      Hope you you understand what I'm trying to say...

      Your Friend

      Lizzy

    • Posted

      Hi Lizzy,

      Talk to your doctor and physiotherapist to show you good excersises for both legs. After first operation Dec 3., I was walking with a cane and visit my physiotherapist about 8th of January. I was walking but it looked like I was a metronom, when using cane it looked OK. After 3 weeks of excersising and magnet therapy I was walking OK without cane, so I got my life back, I was working, going out with my family. Also I talked with my surgeon and he agreed that I was quite ok and ready for another operation, the second hip 18th of Feb. I was ready, and I had some problems when I got back home, but with a help of my surgeon and mostly my wife (she is paediatric MD) I was beck on my feet in 10 days time. So I went to rehabilitation center on 14th of April and I was already walking without a cane. I was excersising alone, at home, I knew all the moves and I was ready.

      Unfortunatlly when I got back from the center, I was not careful so it happened my first dislocation and ..... you know the story. I suggest that you should talk to your surgeon about that feeling in your other hip. My sport MD told me last time that I should strenghten my abductor and adductor and gluteus muscles (I think it is ok written) to avoid any more dislocations.

      I am sending you link 

      This is friend of mine who has operated his left hip and he is working as soccer trainer for kids. This video shows what is he doing in the gym on his 33rd day after the operation, he was operated on Sept. 2nd 2013.

      I will send you more links just to see what can be done with operated hip.

      He has lot of youtube clips because he wanted to help people, to motivate them to excersise and to get their life back. Just to mention he is working everyday few hours and he has only one day rest. The prize is worth all that effort. Anyway you should do only what your body allow to do, don't push to hard on your limits. If you get injury then you should first get well and then start all over again. Happened to me twice.

      Keep on working and think positive.

      Your friend

      Milan 

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  • Posted

    Hi Lizzy,

    the links ar not allowed, so you should try to find it by yourself on youtube under the name bozidar pantelic and 2nd Sept 2013.

    I hope you'll be amazed, but remember his job is trainer so he is working in the gym everyday.

    Best regards,

    your friend Milan

    • Posted

      Hi there friend,

      Thank you for telling me about the YouTube videos suggestions..they are very helpful...I want to thank you also for all your positive advice..It has been real helpful expecially these past days...By the way I started therapy again at the gym today...I'm going to get really for my next operating that way my legs will be strong enough, hopefully...God answered my prayers.....then the next day I get a phone call that I'm starting therapy again..yup when one door closes another one opens..I asked therapist about the feeling on hip and he said that the muscle around the button and the side still need more exercise...but other than that I'm slowly getting back to routine..

      Your friend

      Lizzy

    • Posted

      Great. Keep on with good work and the prize could not be missed.

      Good luck and best regards,

      Your friend Milan

  • Posted

    Hi Lizzy,

    Good luck for tomorrow. I wish you smooth operation and that you are good after it. Let me know how it goes.

    I wish you all the best.

    your friend Milan

    • Posted

      Hey friend,

      Thank you soo much....my operation is august 12, next Wenseday 😕 I haven't been able to sleep good at night just thinking about it...I'm excited/nervous but for sure ready...I've been dreaming about it already..the other night I dram that they stood me up to walk and they left me on my own and I almost fell...lol...I know I'm weird...how are you doing? Getting around better? Your always on my mind I haven't forgot about you, just didn't want to bother you too much YET....😊

      Your friend,

      Lizzy

    • Posted

      Hello Lizzy,

      Good wishes stands for 12th also :-). Last week I had just finished my sport MD visit and he had given me heavier and more complicated excersise, jumps on problematic leg etc. While I was walking out of medical center I had felt down, my leg just went away. Fortunatlly It was not totaly dislocated but a liitle bit and nearby boy had helped me to put it back. So last few days I had ice on my left hip, today I had started with slow excersise without weigths. Before that doctor had told me to use wights of 4 kg to strenghten my hip because it is still not strong enough and he was right, few minutes later I had felt. That is life - fight, fight and fight.

      Be focused and think positive. Good luck.

      Your friend Milan

    • Posted

      Milan,

      I'm so sorry to hear you got hurt again...But don't you think your over doing it a little to much??? I know every dr. Is different, but having you do jumps or 4kg lifts??? It's exactly been 3 months into my surgery and my therapist still don't want me doing jumps...How long where u in the hospital for ur first surgery?? Life is strange so I take it day by day or else I'd go crazy!!! But I'm very excited cause my mother in law is coming with my 3 year old baby boy "Aldo"down on Thursday for a week cause this weekend is my niece's Quincinera....yup she's turning 15 years old...my husband and other kids can't make it cause of school and work but at least I get to spend time with baby for a least week..it's been 2 months since I've seen him..so yes I'm very happy and thank god, too...

      I'll keep you posted

      Trust me, my life is like a novela lol

      Your friend always

      Lizzy

      By 5he way over here is 4:15 am what time is over there when you receive this????

    • Posted

      Hi Lizzy,

      good that you will have emotional and love support. It would be easier for you when you see the kid, but be ready for the operation in your mind. So keep your mind clear and cool and heart warm, I wish you all the luck and happiness in the world.

      It is about 7 or 8 hours time difference, you are late.

      Both times after the operation I was 5 days in hospital and then went home. First surgeon control was after 2 weeks, then they took out all the threads from my scare and then after a week or two I have started with serious excersising and after 6-7 weeks I was walking without any support, I had to be focused on that walk but I was walking without any help or support. Now I use cane only when I got injury, and that last 2-3 weeks, after that I am just holding the cane and not using it, it is only with me as a "walk support if I feel wekness in my leg".

      All this time I am working from home and go to office from time to time, if it is needed, and now I am waiting that my surgeon come home from summer vacation. Than we will sit and talk about possibilities about my future status of the hip. What should I do to get good insight what is happening  inside the hip, is it x-ray, MRI or something else, and then should I go to OR again in September or October, or we can finish the job without cutting me again. And that is it. My job is to be prepared. I will keep you posted.

      Best regards from your friend Milan

    • Posted

      Milan,

      Best wishes to you when it Dr comes back into town...plz keep me posted, and I'll message you after my surgery...meanwhile I'm enjoying my baby...I'm so excited for tomorrow that I can't sleep...lol...wow so then they removed thread from ur scare mine didn't have too they stiched it through the inside...will be careful and take it slow...

      Your friend liz

    • Posted

      Hi Liz,

      Enjoy time with your baby. Click on the envelope that comes with my last reply, and see if you have message. It is beyond my name. Just checking the system of "private" messages.

      Best regards, your friend Milan

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