I miss who I used to be
Posted , 3 users are following.
I dont care if no one reads this or cares. Just venting because life has been a living hell this year.
As a teen I was heavily depressed, controlled by a narcissistic abusive partner and had no reason to live. I distanced from my family and I know it was never their intention, but I was made to feel like a gross human for eating. I was overweight, and got sick with glandular fever so my emotional eating became a single piece of bread a day for a year. I became very small, and no longer got negarive comments about what i ate. unlock my brothee who eats anything he wants and never gains weufht. I was depressed and suicidial by at least I had rhe approval oc my fmily.
now u am 26, once again fg fat and ready to off myseld once more. the year started with my parent taking kver my rental, forxing me into sharing a house with my best friend an hour and a half away but i still laid for everything, i am once again unemployed because i a m literally the worst person to wrok wirh and i am not worth the difg j walk kn. i would very much like to die. the only regret id have is leaving ky cat behind, who was left with me when my latest ex broke up with me over gext. i have $4000 woth of dental issues which landed me a trip to hospital and no pain medication has been able to fix it. i had mould in my car, got abused by a man on the road today and cant even find a job to save my life. absolutely fg s**t human being
0 likes, 1 reply
jan34534 EmptyMeadow
Posted
i’m sorry for all you have gone through and are still going through. However you are too down on yourself.
Every single person on this earth has value whether they believe it or not.
not one person is perfect and we all do things and behave in certain ways that we regret.
The past is the past. It is gone. There’s always a new beginning but you have to make a choice to do that.
Things can improve but you have to work at it.there’s a guy whose childhood was a living hell. He was bullied for his weight among other things. there were other horrible things that went on in his family.
Listen to him. He is a no nonsense guy as well as someone who never ever gave up. david goggins is on you tube. listen to his videos.I am in my 50s and he has inspired me unbelievably!
push Forward and forget about what went wrong in the past or even what’s going wrong now. we either give up or we fight for our lives. He decided to fight.