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I need help

Posted , 5 users are following.

matt18802
matt18802

im on week 8 of 100mg. im really struggling today, no matter how hard i try to push negative thoughts away they keep circulating around my mind which gives me anxious feelings and feeling very low. some of the thoughts are that im never going to feel normal ever again, im stuck like this forever, nothing will improve for me dating wise, no idea what i want from life, have that feeling of wanting to cry but cant. i know this med can take a while to take effect but if i think of how i was this time last year compared to today, i cant even recognise myself now and i hate it

0 likes, 5 replies

5 Replies

  • Guest
    Guest matt18802

    Posted

    hey! dont beat yourself up! you will get better. i know how you feel, but this shall pass. be encouraged that you are making strides and dont forget that this pandemic isnt helping people emotionally, mentally, physically, etc. we were not created to be isolated-and you probably are limited in talking and being with people which is what you and all of us need to bring healing. be patient, which i know is difficult-but what i have found that gets me through every day is my faith in Jesus Christ that created me and did NOT make a mistake! He knows what you are going through and will help refine you to make you better if you believe and have given your life to Him. Yes, i know i am preaching but as a believer thats my job. hope this helps!

  • sha13553
    sha13553 matt18802

    Edited

    Matt,

    I'm sorry to hear you're still struggling. I posted about a month ago and you had replied.

    Keep going.

    Have you been diagnosed with OCD? I can't remember if you had previously said it's negative thoughts or intruisive thoughts.

    If you can, try getting into CBT therapy.

    For general anxiety and depression, I'd recommend checking out the Blindboy podcast on spotify, look for the ones on core beleifs and cognitive psychology. He talks about how to challenge them yourself using CBT. You can also get CBT workbooks online. This is the opposite of what you should do for OCD.

    For OCD/Intruisive thoughts, the trick is to not push them away. You try to challenge them implicitly. I realised I was trying to argue with the thoughts and I was getting worse and worse. Think of a bully at your door:

    Bully comes to the door and says they will beat you up if you dont give them £20.

    Response 1. You respond by giving in. Bully keeps coming back. (Beleiving the bully)

    Response 2. You argue, debate and rationalise with the bully, they eventually get what they want. Bully keeps coming back.

    Response 3. You acknowledge the bully, label the bully as a bully and say I know what you want but I won't give in. They keep trying for a while but eventually go away.

    Intruisive thoughts are like a bully in your head. At the moment I'm 1. labelling the thought, 2. Telling myself I won't complete my ritual (rationalizing with it). This looks like me saying, "that's an ocd thought, I'm not even going to rationalise it". Then I go about what I was doing before.

    This has allowed me to separate myself from the thoughts. Initially, I felt loads of anxiety, but the more I do it, the less meaning the thoughts have. I maybe said it 1000 times the first day, then 500, then 100 ect. Now I'm down to a few times a day, feeling much better and am about to start ERP.

    I hope this is helpful. Please reach out to a therapist if you can. You will get through this

    😃 lots of love.

    • matt18802
      matt18802 sha13553

      Posted

      Hey, i have pure-O. ive been feeling better the last few days. some days i can brush off intrusive thoughts and some days it can be tough going. Ive been looking at cbt but i need to find a ocd specialist first and covids still a thing. thank you for giving me some tips 👍

    • sha13553
      sha13553 matt18802

      Posted

      Hi, me too. It's tough going isn't it? I'm actually starting ERP today - I'll keep you posted on how I get on. Hopefully the tips I gave help in some way. Yeah covid makes things more awkward. Mine is over skype at the moment 😃

  • jess80965
    jess80965 matt18802

    Posted

    Matt it will get better, i was on 50 dosage last year and it took a bit of time but it is so good when it works i know and can relate to everything you are feeling. it is true what everyone says and that is to be patient xx

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