I question feelings for my (perfect) girlfriend. Why do I feel like this?
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I am writing this because I don't know what else to do. For some context, I am twenty and have had severe anxiety and depression since middle school (I am medicated and attend therapy regularly to help deal with it). I was in an emotionally / mentally abusive relationship from 2018-2020. After that ended, I dated a few more people and all of the relationships ended up being toxic.
I met my current girlfriend in 2022, and we began dating at the beginning of 2023. She truly is the most genuine and perfect girl I have ever met. When I am with her, I enjoy my time with her. But for some reason, I question my feelings for her and I don't know why. She is everything I have ever dreamed of having, so why do I feel like this? I don't have any feelings for any of my exes, so I know it is not that, but could I be feeling this way because I've never experienced a healthy relationship until now? Could it be because of my depression and anxiety? I've been feeling depressed on and off lately, and I'm not sure why because everything in life is good. I'm starting to think my medicine is no longer working as much as it was before.
Please help. Is it normal to question my feelings for my girlfriend? I know I care about her very much and see a future with her— the thought of losing her makes me cry. I even told her how I've been feeling and she has been so patient and understanding with me. What do you think the cause of this is? How should I deal with this? Will this go away? I'm so scared.
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jan34534 astrostar
Posted
So you just started dating in January. Give it some time. It takes at least six months to know if a person wants to continue dating someone. Learn as much as you can about her.
also, it is difficult to be in a relationship when you have anxiety and depression. Because if you don’t feel healthy as a person, it’s difficult to give to a relationship. So take care of yourself first and when you start to feel better, you’ll be in a better spot to make a decision on how your relationship is going.
I’m sure that I am way older than you and I have seen too many people get serious right away when they don’t really even know each other about the things that really matter. In the beginning everybody is on their best behavior. The real test comes six months to a year later, when you have gotten to know the person a lot better.
There’s no rush. Take one day at a time right now.
but for now, see if you can get some help for your anxiety and depression.