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I really give up now

Posted , 4 users are following.

thedelboy
thedelboy

For so long I have been suffering with depression, and I am sick and tired of feeling like rubbish, I have severe abdominal pain and Chronic arthritis, osteo and rheumatoid, so I am getting more and more depressed I sit in my flat all day and night doing nothing just in constant pain ! I am Not agoraphobic but am terrified of going out of my flat ,I get serious panic attacks if I try going outside alone, I did not go to my grand daughters funeral as I had a panic attack and could not get to the airport, my Mum ids severely ill in Rugby St cross Hospice/hospital and I can't visit ! Why the hell can't I get my Drs to understand my pain? I just can't go on like this things just seem to kick me when I am down I really do not want to live like this ,I am Not suicidal but am trying hard to get the money together so I can go to dignitas and end this torment ! Why can't Drs help people in my situation? All I want is for my pain physically and mentally to cease desist stop or at least become bearable ! I was told I have PTSD but that is cobblers I am just seriously depressed

1 like, 6 replies

6 Replies

  • hypercat
    hypercat thedelboy

    Posted

    Hi you don't say if you are having any treatment for your physical and mental problems?  Are you?   Depression is very common in chronic conditions so you need treatment for this too.   Have you asked for a referral to a pain clinic?   Can you get someone to go to the doctors with you or get them to come out?  x
    • thedelboy
      thedelboy hypercat

      Posted

      I have had spinal injections at the pain clinic, but due to the lack of any rel relief they have sttopped giving them to me hence the dosage of Morphine I have stopped all my other painkillers and most of my meds I only take the Oramorph and citalopram now becaiuse at least my mind functions and I am not asleep all day and night and tbh the mental health care round here is non existant they call you a couple of times then just forget you after promising they are reffering you to another team that can deal with my problems ! I do not beleive I have any mental health issues depression is not a mental health issue from what I gather from my Dr , and getting a Dr to come to you is unheard of here ! 
    • hypercat
      hypercat thedelboy

      Posted

      Hi if you are on citalopram you are on anti-depressants so your doctor is giving you meds for it.  To be honest I would change your doctor.  If you are in a group surgery you can see anyone you like you know.  All doctors know that depression is very common with chronic illness and usually give as much help as possible. 

      You have a right to ask for counselling - ok you might have to wait quite a long time unless you can afford to pay,  but if you don't ask you don't get.   They can also come out to you if you can't leave the house.   A few on here have home visits from them.   Unfortunately you often have to fight for it and it sounds like you have been lost in the system somewhere.

      All doctors make house calls when they really have to - after all many of their patients are housebound and physically can't get there.  They don't want to make them and try and put you off but you can insist.

      Please don't just give up as you are worth fighting for.  You also have us now so you are no longer alone.  Ok?  x 

  • elizabeth20203
    elizabeth20203 thedelboy

    Posted

    I don't know your age, i am in my fifties and have suffered Osteo arthritis for a long time, i had septic arthritis since aged 11. I can understand the debilitating life from living with constant pain. I would advise seeing your GP and asking to be refered to a pain clinic, and they will reveiw your meds. I have nerve pain now after having several operations. I am partially disabled now. I also suffer depression and anxiety. It is difficult to socilise especially being in pain as i cannot sit comfortably or stand for long and only walk very short distances. Have you any family as i am sure they would miss you if you wasns't around. I realise your pain will not go away but with the right meds you may be able to manage it better. What meds are you on? Have you seen someone about your depression and other mental health conditions you have. Please don't give up. I live for my grandchildren and am now trying to enjoy my life more. I do get frustrated that i cannot do the things others take for granted but i couldn't die just yet.

     

    • thedelboy
      thedelboy elizabeth20203

      Posted

      I am also in my fifties , and used to enjoy life, I now have nothing to give anymore ! I no longer work have no patience with people I just can not be around them , although I am happy for them being able to enjoy their lives , I also miss my other grandchildren but genuinely have nothing to give them , I am no longer able to have anyone around me as I am just too grumpy , I know what my abdominal pains are caused by it is "Diverticulitis"  the only thing I have to look forward too with any certainty is the damn DWP  ATOS and PIP interogations which seem to occur every year ! what the hell do they not understand about "Degenerative"  ?? all I want is to make sure that when this gets any worse I do not have to rely on anyone to help me get to Dignitas that I go on my terms and not have to rely on Drs or nurses keeping me going when I could would very happily take a painless way out before that happens ! it is already happening i have days when I can not move at all as its too painful call it cowardice whatever at least it will be my choice!
  • fun91712
    fun91712 thedelboy

    Posted

    I'm not saying it's going to be easy. If you having any treatment for your physical problems. You should continue this, nothing in life is easy. But that's no reason to give up. You'll be surprised what you can accomplish if you set your mind to it. After all, you only have one life, so you should try to make the most of it.
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