I've been a mental health patient for the last 6 years at least and I am also a junior doctor in UK

I recall the first episode of my depressive disorder in late 2012 to early 2013. This was following a trip I had made that led me away from my family to new location.

At first, I was quite perplexed to experience the symptoms. I had periods of oversleep, tiredness, lack of motivation, lack of energy, bouts of self-doubt, weeping spells. This continued during my medical school, till I realised that something needed to be done about it.

I want to consultant psychiatrist who diagnosed me with depression and started me on an SSRI. 2 weeks in to treatment, I felt an amazing improvement in my overall health and well-being. I felt I was back to what I was before the treatment.

Medical school had it's own stress and I had certain personal circumstances which made things stressful again, and I started to feel like I was relapsing. My psychiatrist suggested that I increase my SSRI to the maximum dose and I did that. Again, within a couple of weeks, I felt an instant improvement and it felt like I was alive again.

With time, medical school continued to be a constant and increasing source of stress, while my personal circumstances weren't great either. My next consultation with my psychiatrist led me to cross taper my SSRI with a newer medication, the SNRI class. And again, within a couple of weeks, life was back on track. I pushed myself to achieve my personal and professional goals but I started to notice a pattern to my mental health illness.

It seemed as though my body would require a constant modification of treatment. During this phase, I accomplished certain personal and professional goals and I came to the UK to practice medicine and with an aim to specialise in psychiatry.

I came here with a prescription of my SNRI which I was to continue due to my predisposition to relapsing/recurrent depressive episodes while away from my family. However, the SNRI failed to help me as within a week of starting work in the UK, I relapsed in to severe depression. This time the severity of the depressive episode was severe enough to introduce thoughts, plans of self-harm. Being a doctor, I had the insight to recognise this lethal symptomatology and I seeked out help.

I was lucky to have a wonderful support system with in the NHS. My educational supervisor signposted me to register with my GP, my GP immediately ran a thorough work-up of my physical health profile and signposted me to occupational health services with my employer (NHS).

I received amazing support from occupational health at Northumbria Healthcare NHS Foundation Trust where I utilised Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (6 sessions did the trick for me). In the meantime, while I struggled to balance my personal and professional life, my GP referred me to Tertiary Care Services for specialist opinion.

I then voluntarily started my treatment with tertiary care services where I had a re-assessment of my underlying diagnosis. It was here that I was made aware that I may be a victim of Bipolar Disorder and possibly not a depressive disorder. I had full faith in my care team and with the insight of my consultant, was started on treatment for Bipolar Disorder.

As I write my story, I am currently admitted as a patient under the Section 3 of the Mental Health Act (UK), I continue to follow the care plan established by my consultant and I am delighted to say that my mental health diagnosis has been established to be Bipolar Disorder. I am currently in remission, thanks to the vision of my entire care team and my own insight as a junior doctor.

I would like to end by saying that my struggle with mental health continues and continue my pursuit of treatment. I believe that the system established in the UK is wonderful system (NHS) which treats patients in the most dignified manner, myself being a doctor, I can say that I am proud to be a doctor working for the NHS, I am proud to be a patient of the NHS and I wish to continue working for the NHS far in to the near future as long as my mental and physical health allow me to.

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