I've been depressed for almost a year and idk what to do!

Posted , 5 users are following.

I'm actually finding out that I'm in the near-suicidal zone because I almost attempted suicide. When I'm around my friends I tell jokes and smile just to hide the pain. Apperantly I'm in a case is serious depression but I can't figure out how to bring it up with my family. Today, I had to do rolls in pe, so I kicked my head as hard as I could, and then during cartwheels I bent my wrist completely sideways. I realized what I did just as the pain registered, so like five seconds after. I keep worrying what I'll do to myself next.

It started last winter, but it was mild up until a month ago, when I suddenly was too miserable to sleep but to tired to try in school. Presently I am failing math and not in any activities because I can't bring myself to consider anything. When I attempted to tell someone, I told my sister who said I was exadurating big time. I looked up symptoms, and I fit most of them. I've lost my appetite but somehow gained weight. I loved lasagna, but now it seems devoid of flavor. I know that I need help, but I'm scared to ask. I don't know what to do and what caused this. My lack of knowing has been driving me insane, so to speak. I'm socially awkward, and my ex is worried about me. I'm 12 so I have no idea if I'm supposed to be like this or not. I find myself listening to the saddest music I can find. What do I do?

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  • Posted

    Dear Nikki,

    I got passed this block by self referring to Talking Therapy. That got the ball rolling. Once the Therapy started together with medication I quickly became safe from suicide and much happier. 

    Please get the ball rolling today. Severe depression is dangerous. People arround you and you yourself will almost certainly underestimate the severity of the situation. A professional assessment is vital.

    With my best wishes,

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  • Posted

    Please honey you need to tell your parents or someone you can speak to .I've had depression half of my life and would only talk to my doctor until about six weeks ago I was having suicidal thoughts that very day I was referred to a crisis team of phsycriatic nurses had to change me medication and have called at house every day I'm slowly improving but you need to get help please

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  • Posted

    Hi Nikki - sorry to read of your situation. Echoing what everyone here has said - you need to tell someone about this situation. If not your parents, then is there a counsellor at school you can tell? What about one of your teachers? Please ignore what your sister is saying - accusing someone of exagerating their feelings is a common response to depression because it's an illness that doesn't manifest physical symptoms. You need someone you can talk to who will listen and not dismiss you. Reach out, don't be afraid, you cannot carry this alone. You will feel better about it when you have made that first move. Best of luck to you - and you can always talk to us in this site if you need information. 

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