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I've been depressed since I was diagnosed

Posted , 5 users are following.

deja14289
deja14289

was diagnosed with herpes and I have type 1 & 2 on December 24 2015 & I've been crying ever since . I'm only 20 and I feel angry , depressed , and ashamed and so digisted with myself . I have a boyfriend and he does not have it but sometimes I ask myself why doe he stay ? I still don't understand . It feels like my life has just stopped and I'm losing track of everything . Having herpes is getting the best of me . Sometimes it's hard To even get it if bed .

0 likes, 26 replies

26 Replies

  • princess52104
    princess52104 deja14289

    Posted

    Do you feel like talking I'll talk too u I was 22 wen I found out
    • deja14289
      deja14289 princess52104

      Posted

      Princess52104, I could use some advice on how to handle this or even function
    • princess52104
      princess52104 deja14289

      Posted

      You just have too deal with it like I do and move on with life depressed will hit you but you have overcome it you beat herpes herpes don't beat you ..
  • FelizCastus
    FelizCastus deja14289

    Posted

    Hang in there! I totally hear you, and it can be depressing if you dwell on it too much, so try to think positively and on other things. smile At least you have a bf, so you are better than off than those of us who are single with this! How were you confirmed positive for both types, and how do you know for sure that your bf doesn't have it himself? Just curious.
    • princess52104
      princess52104 FelizCastus

      Posted

      True cause wen I found out I was depressed I still do get depressed it's been a year since I found out
    • deja14289
      deja14289 FelizCastus

      Posted

      I try to hang in there Bc I heard if you stress it can bring on an outbreak and I'm scared to have one 😿. I know it's going happen sooner r later . But December 15th I went to my gyn Bc I wasn't feeling right u know . So I was like I feel like I have a terrible terrines yeast infection and she did blood work on me and checked and she said I can tell u before anything comes back u have a really bad BV infection and she said I could have PID well I got a call a few days later on Christmas Eve saying that I tested negative for chylmadia and gonnerhea and stuff but I tested positive for herpes . So she put me on a lot of medications and then said oh and it's not curable . So I cried non stop & I started having allergic reactions to all the meds especially valacylovir . So it just didn't sit well with me as to which type I had Bc I didn't have an outbreak and no blister so I just didn't know . So January 26th I went to a new obgyn and she said she wanted to test me for which type I had and asked if I would be okay with that I said yes and two days later she called me and said I do have type 1 & 2 sad and yes I do have a boyfriend but it's hard it puts a huge strain on our relationship Bc I have lost all my sex drive and I feel so gross and digisted with myself and he got tested
    • FelizCastus
      FelizCastus deja14289

      Posted

      I know how you feel. I have days when I feel down and my overall natural enthusiasm is not like how it used to be. I'm a more boring version of my former self, lol. But I try to not always dwell on it, which is easier to do when not having recurrences and when I'm busy with work, etc. Too much quiet time for reflection can make you sad, so try to keep yourself occupied and do things for you, things that you enjoy.

      So long as the blood tests done by you and your bf were both IgG (not IgM or pcr), then the results should be fairly accurate, but it's useful to know for sure, including your test values. If your bf really doesn't have it, do you know how you acquired it? As for sex, yeah, I'm feeling pretty asexual these days. I can't see myself getting excited over sex anymore. Maybe that will change at some point and with the right person, but for now I just want to do nothing and focus on keeping my body strong.

    • deja14289
      deja14289 FelizCastus

      Posted

      Yeah I'm a teacher so when I'm around my kids they take the pain away n off my mind and it's easier but after 6:30 I feel alone again & as if the world is closing in on me and no my Bf doesn't have it and yes I got tested twice already . And me and my bf we're best friends for 5 years before we dated , and when I was single before November I was involved with someone and he doesn't even care he gave it to me he blocked my number Bc I wouldn't leave him alone about it sad it's just like my family and friends all say its okay u will be okay life goes on its not the end of the world u aren't the only one with herpes . And it's easier said then done but they don't have it and yes they are right it's not something deadly and I can live with it but I'm so angry inside .
  • Anneannnie06
    Anneannnie06 deja14289

    Posted

    I'm 20 and I just found out I have it and I'm mmmm so depressed toosad I totally know how you're feeling. if you ever wanna private message me and talk about it please do. I so know how you are feeling. how do you know your boyfriend doesn't have it though? or that he wasnt the one who gave you it? just curious
    • deja14289
      deja14289 Anneannnie06

      Posted

      Of course ! We can message ! And Bc he got tested and when I got it we were single at the time . My boyfriend and is also my best friend so we waited 5 years to date so when I was sleeping with someone else I wasn't dealing with my boyfriend on that level . It's terrible Bc we waited so long to date and it's now I have to worry when we have sex even with a condom I can still give it to him . And having type 1&2 really took me over the edge . Sometimes it feels like I'm barely hanging on . They didn't wanna put me on medication Bc i haven't had an outbreak yet and anything but when she called and said I had type 1 & 2 she wanted to put me back on new meds twice a day. I'm so sorry u have it trust me I know it's the worse
  • mikarose
    mikarose deja14289

    Posted

    Hi deja I was diagnosed the start of December last year. I know it's tough. I spent many days crying and feeling like my life was over.

    Am I reading correctly that you've never had an outbreak?! That's so lucky!! I am on meds since my first outbreak to prevent any future ones. You may never have an outbreak or if you do it might be very small and not bothersome! Don't stress. Keep the bv under control too because that can often be confused with an outbreak.

    May I ask what is your boyfriend like about this? Does he reassure you that you are still the same person and that you don't deserve to feel bad about this?

    • deja14289
      deja14289 mikarose

      Posted

      Hello mikarose ! You are reading right I have not had an outbreak I thought that the BV was my outbreak but it wasn't I had just had it for 3 months and it was just the worse thing ever it felt like my insides was on fire and it itched so badly ! I just wanna know how do I keep the outbreaks low . I was taken off the meds but when I got retested and found out I had type 1 & 2 I got put back on the medicine . She said that she wanted to test me for the past and active herpes and she said that I was exposed to type 1&2 and that's why I have it but it is not active as before but that didn't make any sense to me . I got back next week but he's been really supportive and I just don't understand who would want to stay with someone and they don't have it he has said that he wants me to give it to him so I won't have to go through this alone but I just stay to myself . I won't kiss him or do anything now
    • FelizCastus
      FelizCastus deja14289

      Posted

      Did they swab you for herpes at the time of the bv? It could well have been an outbreak at some point, with the bv persisting long after.
    • deja14289
      deja14289 FelizCastus

      Posted

      She did a swab but it wasn't an outbreak she said just a really bad bacterial infection she did my blood work to find out the herpes
    • FelizCastus
      FelizCastus deja14289

      Posted

      Would be good if you could get a copy of your actual lab results. Sometimes ill-informed doctors run inappropriate blood tests for H and your results may thus not be accurate, etc. Imagine if you don't even have it, or only one type, not both! Positive Type 1 can cause a low false positive for Type 2 by HerpeSelect, for example.
    • deja14289
      deja14289 FelizCastus

      Posted

      I went to two gyn my old one and a new one my old one told me nothing my new way said she wanted to check me for both to see if it's still active or was I exposed in the past but like I said that never made any sense to me and when she called two days later she said I had Beene doused to type 1&2 and I have both
    • deja14289
      deja14289 princess52104

      Posted

      Type 1 is your mouth & type 2 is your gentials , sometimes u don't even have to do oral to get type 1 anyone with a cold sore and kisses you or if they go down on you and then kiss u . In still trying to figure out when it all happened for me everything just becomes a blur 😞
    • FelizCastus
      FelizCastus deja14289

      Posted

      If I were you, I would ask for a copy of your results. I have read posts where people were told and advised the wrong thing by their docs, from the type of test done and interpretation of the results to when herpes is contagious, etc. You'd be surprised. From what you've said so far, you don't know which test was performed, other than it being a blood test, nor do you know your index values. Anyway, that's for you to decide. Personally, I always ask for a copy of my lab results.
    • deja14289
      deja14289 FelizCastus

      Posted

      I'm moving to a new state so when I go to my next appointment I'm going ask for a new copy
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