I wish I was never born
Posted , 4 users are following.
I've been treated like crap since the moment I was born. Nobody has ever loved me, including my mother. I'm mostly ignored, other times bullied. I live in the US and am a vulnerable adult, which means I have to have to have a guardian and someone to live with. Well, my new family treats me like crap all the time. They're constantly excluding me from things over the simplest things, like talking mythology with their kids. They excluded me from a dinner date with their friends over that, didn't tell me it was a punishment, and after I spent the whole night wondering where they were/crying, they told me if I had gone over there, they would've ridiculed me for doing so. That was when I 1st moved in and they didn't tell me I wasn't supposed to talk mythology with their kids, cause apparently it's bullying for me to talk of non-Christian things with their kids, yet they can force me to do Christian things like pray at dinner when I'm not Christian. They punish me for my Asperger's meltdowns all the time. Literally they will chase me into my room or spray me in the face with a water bottle or scream at me face to face. I tried to say I want to talk to my social worker. They say fine we'll talk to the social worker about finding you another place to live and call animal control on your cats. I try to say I'm really depressed/suicidal, they say fine we'll put you in a mental hospital. They don' want me to get a therapist, cause they're afraid I'll talk to them about them and get them in trouble, they don't want me to have a phone, cause they're afraid I'll call DCF. They refuse to change their ways and they think I'm the problem. Today they all got Subway, and I got nothing. I just wish, like my mother wanted, that I was never born. I'm pretty sure nobody would want my miserable life, and I wished I had never lived it.
0 likes, 3 replies
Emis_Moderator Broena
Posted
Hi Broena,
We note from a recent post which you have made to our forum that you may be experiencing thoughts around self-harm. If we have misinterpreted your comments then we apologise for contacting you directly. But if you are having such thoughts then please note that you are not alone in this, and there are people out there that can help.
If you are having these suicidal thoughts then we strongly recommend you speak to someone who may be able to help. The organisations below can help you explore your options, understand your problems better, or just be there to listen. If you are having such thoughts then please do reach out to one of these organisations who will understand what you're going through and will be able to help.
There are several helplines in the US which can help you.
They include the Crisis Call Center on Phone: (800) 273-8255;
Hopeline Network on Phone: (800) 422-HOPE (1-800-422-4673)
and the National Suicide Prevention Hotline on Phone: (800) 273-TALK (1-800-273-8255).
Please do reach out - there are many good people who can help.
For users outside of the USA please have a look at this page https://www.befrienders.org/directory
Kindest regards,
Patient
healthy06102 Broena
Posted
Life is full of struggles buddy! Just introspect and try to admire the world we live in. Learn new things and keep yourself busy.
Good luck.
bernipes Broena
Posted
Hi, Broena! It makes me very sad to read your story and realize how cruel people can be. From what you told, it sounds really hard for the people you live with to support you in proper treatment, but you need to get help. Try to find a way to talk to someone from outside the house and get help. About wishing you had never been born, don't think like that. You can still make a difference in many people's lives. Stay strong!