identity disorder

How is difficult to follow or make one wants for oneself. I since long time of ago, I have a different perspective about my life. I have ended to making the less that I imagine to What happen in my life. 

?How can change some perspective that people have created around Me. I don't know how explain this, but i noticed how people have control of my feeling and use this for make a depressive person intentionally and accidentally.  now , I have become most strong emotional and begin to control some weakness, they seem that don't like my change. How will make for don't take care that others think of me without that this affect self-confidence and how can make for try of find my own identity without to take account of others. I feel that have a disorder of identity since that when I have young, I want to end like high school and later marry with someone and have some children. now I am older, never end some academic profession, never marry and never have had some child. I don't know that happen with me in where I make wrong. I don't know that if not result in a way; one can try it in different ways and many ways until get one want in life because the life is short. That you advice me

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