Im an alcoholic pothead with a gambling habit, sex addiction self harmer

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Hi

Not a great title but its exactly true.

I am and have been smoking 10+ spliffs per day for atleast 7 or 8 years, and started 4 or 5 years before that.

In 2017 I quite weed for good and tobacco and went onto vaping, i was doing well, and then found alcohol (which I never really touched before) and got addicted to that.

The whole while I was addicted to sex as well and I have a partner, so I cheated a few times, but told her and gained her trust back each time, UNTILL I started drinking.

You see, from 18 I was a gambler. I got hooked fast cause I won money fast when I was young and it funded my habits for a short period, and then I went onto loans ect and ruined my financial history and now Im 23 with 15k in debt from loans and still living with my depressive mother.

After I started drinking 1ltr + of whiskey per day (seriously) i started getting really crazy, doing mad things, telling everyone i was going to kill myself, cutting myself hundreds of times, and even once actually stabbing myself and going to ane, at which point I quit the alcohol andtold everyone I would go back to weed because atleast I didnt self harm then and try and kill myself, and everyyone agreed... From there I quit alcohol for about 2 weeks, then started secretely drinking, then told people slowly and earned some trust back, but they were still very worried, and then I started going back up to a litre a day and actually gambled 4000+ of my gfs money and 6000+ of my dads money, until the point where hes given up on me, and she is getting very annoyed ( yes im lucky she hasnt left me yet).

So, recently, I agreed to switch to beer because its so much weaker, and its been helping, but over the last 2 months ive been drinking 4-5 beers before work, 2 beers on lunch, and then maybe 5+ beers after work, and at the same time smoking x number of spliffs. I try and control myself but I just cant do it, i really, really really, really, really cant. I have tried so many times. I apply to the nhs for help and by the time letters come, I just discard them because im not in the frame of mind anymore. Now I dont know what to do because everyone is loosing so much hope with me and I just dont have anyone to help me. I was sure this month I could atleast not gamble but do the drinking and weed but I endded up gambling and now ive spent my gfs 1300 paycheck again and am still sponging alcohol money from her. Be as disgusted at me as you may but I jsut want to know if anyone has ever had so many addictions at once and managed to come out of it, and how did you do it? 

I dont want to hear "i quit alcohol ect ect" or "I quit weed ect ect". My family gives me all that and my friends do to. I want to hear from someone with mental health xperience or experience of this many addictions at once.

I dont want to sound rude there but im clearly intoxicated as always and looking for a bit more motivation to stop.

 

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4 Replies

  • Posted

    You have to want to stop for yourself for you to get the help and stick to the programme that you are put on.  If you are serious about wanting to stop then go to the GP, tell your partner everything, let her know when your appointments are and get her to go with you for support.  Failure to do something will result in you getting worse and losing everything.  That is the motivation that you need.
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  • Posted

    well first of all let's be clear, you're not addicted to cannabis, that's not a thing. if you drink alcohol and smoke weed its proven to be safer for your brain than just drinking alcohol because cannabis protects brain cells from being damaged. spliffs though? tobacco is no good and it's a waste of money, stick with just weed. 

    you should go to an in patient detox rehab for alcohol if you can't stop on your own. i was addicted to xanax and alcohol a few years ago and the only way out is you sincerely have to want out, want to stop.

    you're addictions are very extreme so you need an extreme intervention. i normally recommend continuing with cannabis though your situations seems so severe i would put some thought into that. 

    try a moderate dose of mushrooms and youll probably want to stop drinking because you'll realize you don't need it anymore and its ruining your life. psychedelics have been proven to be the most effect method for drug addiction so you should look into that.

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  • Posted

    I am similar . I gamble daily, drink and get very depressed on losses. My case is mold next to Yours, bit it still causing distress. What they told me what I have as underlying underlying condition is anxiety , where gambling , using , and obsessing are coping mechanisms. The previously guilt provoking actions habe not cleared up, so I am replaying them to diminish and finally try to eliminate the fuolt6 , even if their sources can not be cut out. Anything like what Your are going throug
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  • Posted

    Lifes a struggle.. are you actually working still?

    You clearly want help to be so candid on a forum but can you get into rehab.. without all the external distractions..

    This is not a blah blah blah situation as I myself am in a terribly low place.. I do hope you get the help you need

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