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Impending operation and terrified

Posted , 21 users are following.

Lilylou1
Lilylou1

Hello. I’m 44 and have hip dysplasia I need an operation due to the severity of it. My surgeon said I should have had a hip replacement a few years ago. It is going to be more complex as a result. I’m totally terrified. Beyond scared. I anticipate I will have the operation in December to work around other commitments. I am having a CT scan next week to get a better look at the damage. Unfortunately it’s all I’m really thinking about at the moment ??

1 like, 112 replies

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  • ptolemy
    ptolemy Lilylou1

    Posted

    I was in such agony I was almost the opposite and worried silly they would cancel the operation. The operation itself was pretty easy. I had a spinal and chose to stay awake through it as I wanted to know what was going on. I was worried silly about going home, but discovered I could really carry on much the same as before in fact better as I had very limited movement and a lot of pain before the op. I was very lucky and did not seem to need pain killers after I left hospital, although they gave me boxes of pain killers to take home with me. I was also dreading getting out of bed for the first time. In fact I can’t actually remember it, I think I just got out and started to walk with a frame. I think I was concentrating so much on how to use a frame! The important thing is to choose a good surgeon and to get as fit as possible beforehand. My sister stayed with me for a week after I got home and decided to spring clean the house, I now cannot find anything.
    • Lilylou1
      Lilylou1 ptolemy

      Posted

      I am so glad you had a good experience! Did the spinal hurt going in?  You are brave staying awake I want to be a bit more sedated as I think hearing everything will increase anxiety! Thank you for your response. I am ridiculously tearful and that is just not me. Part of me wants to back out of this but I won’t.
    • ptolemy
      ptolemy Lilylou1

      Posted

      No problem, the spinal was fine. Just sat down and they injected anaesthetic into my back with a thin needle. I had to have an emergency op for something totally different three weeks later and was told I should have a general, they did not mention a spinal. I was so impressed with my hip op one I asked if I could have a spinal and luckily they said yes. In this case I had a conversation with the surgical team about the Spanish problem in Catalonia! I went home that night. You can have sedation of various levels, it is just that I was nosey and wanted to know what was going on. 
    • Lilylou1
      Lilylou1 ptolemy

      Posted

      Your a legend! Taking it all in your stride....I think I need to harden up a bit x
    • ptolemy
      ptolemy Lilylou1

      Posted

      Perhaps where there is no sense there is no feeling!
  • Ms._Lupe
    Ms._Lupe Lilylou1

    Posted

    Hi,

    Just wanted to give you some words of encouragement and some hugs. It is scary having a major surgery, and it's not a walk in the park, but I can say life will be so much easier after it. I had my left hip replaced 2 weeks before my 38th birthday. I also should have had it done earlier, but didn't have medical coverage for it. So I limped along for 2 yrs. Mine needed to be replaced because of severe arthritis, it was the worst case the Dr had seen in someone my age. My cousin had hers done at 30 because of severe hip dysplasia. I can say it was a life changer. The pain is gone and I'm able to bend at my waist and walk again. The recoup isn't so bad. Its not easy, mine was harder because of muscle issues from not using them for years, but within 6 weeks I was using a cane and feeling almost normal. Pain isn't real bad, just take it slow. It's not a competition, lol, something my physical therapist had to remind me of on a regular basis. Find a good recliner, it'll make sleeping easier the 1st couple weeks after surgery. Something not too soft, and a good height. Make sure you have room in your house to get around using a walker. They can be bully, but are necessary for a bit. Try to focus on the stuff you'll be able to do after you're healed, it helped me stay motivated and avoid the "why me" feeling. It was tough for the 1st few weeks for me, I have a toddler and couldn't be the mom I wanted to be, But now I'm able to run, play, crawl, and carry him for the 1st time in his life and It's amazing. So just take some deep breaths and know that this is for the best, and life is going to be easier after the bumpy patch. It's worth all the work. ?

    • Lilylou1
      Lilylou1 Ms._Lupe

      Posted

      Lovely to hear from you and thank you!  It is good to hear similar stories and to hear the outcomes.  I have been feeling quite distressed and my husband has said to me I am acting distressed although I fail to see it.....must be subconscious.....I think I will keep reading these replies over the next few months to try and keep things in perspective.  x
  • RichardKen
    RichardKen Lilylou1

    Posted

    Dear Lily

    It perfectly normal to feel terrified. Make sure that your surgeon is top notch going on hospital records...does not matter if they have a rotten bedside manner, what only matters on the outcomes they have had. Get as fit as possible before the surgery and BE POSITIVE.

    Good luck. Richard

    • Lilylou1
      Lilylou1 RichardKen

      Posted

      Hello there, yes I agree. My surgeon seems confident and has done over a thousand of these...is that good?? I have upped my exercise and am going to add in resistance training. Thank you for your response. 
  • pam00470
    pam00470 Lilylou1

    Posted

    bless you,i think everyone is a bit scared-id say its normal!it is major surgery after all.my surgeon was very matter of fact and joked a lot when i saw him before the op,which actually gave me lots of confidence,i looked at it this way-they probably could do the op blindfold,they must do so many.i hope you get the same lovely feeling of relief,warmth and comfort i got when i came round back in my bed!All over!(bar the recovery!) the worst thing for me was not being able to walk my lovely dogs,and living alone was a bit scary at first-however,my daughter helped with the dogs till i could stagger out with them,and was on the end of the phone if i needed her-for which i am very grateful.we cope-case of having to! Im sure you ll be fine,you ll probably amaze yourself!I really wish you the best.this site was a godsend to me,in the early days-just having people who ve been through it to talk to is such a help! good luck Lilylou xxx
    • Lilylou1
      Lilylou1 pam00470

      Posted

      Hey there, I really do hope I wake up like you said, it sounds silly but the waking up part in itself will be a relief! I’m petrified I’m going to have a heart attack or stroke I have thought of everything that could go wrong and magnified it ten times....I am feeling more tearful than normal.  I hope I amaze myself. It feels like a weird place to be this limbo pre-op.

      You are really brave living alone and dealing with this. I am so glad that the outcome has been positive xx

    • april264
      april264 Lilylou1

      Posted

      You WILL be ok.  I was the same, yes everyone is scared a bit and scared a lot BUT I can hear what you are saying and understand what you feel like.  I became totally irrational about the whole thing.  I think I was having small panic attack after panic attack.  My toilet habits changed, palpitations that almost made me faint etc.  Then I'd give myself a good talking to and would be ok until the next wave of fear.  

      Now the good news...HONESTLY...it was nowhere near as bad as I had made it out to be.  In fact I sometimes think the weeks leading up to it were almost worse than the post op, including the immediate post anaesthetic etc.  Please believe me.  I do hear what you are feeling and can relate to it.  Its not about amazing yourself, its about the fact that its done!  I hated the thought of not being able to control anything and to have to put myself into the charge of others?  Does that sound familiar?  Oh and tears....well expect them to continue here and there.  I still get tearful - I think I'm in the final stages of recovery even now.  Weird pains here and there that are the deep tissues repairing and nerve ending coming back...I never would have thought I would say that and not be terrified I something might have gone wrong.  Also I am actually proud of myself

    • Lilylou1
      Lilylou1 april264

      Posted

      Hey there yes it does sound familiar.....i sent my husband a text saying about the fact i feel i have a lack of control over everything...i feel so betrayed by my body (sounds weird), I feel I am too young to be cracking up quite yet....he is pragmatic and thinks the impending operation is necessary and going to be awesome re the outcome....I don't share his enthusiasm yet lol....re the fibroid that was just found through the scan for my hip he is telling me he would forget about it its nothing......i also have a herniated disc from the hip (if that makes sense), i guess everything impacts everything so to speak.

      I am glad you are on the other side of this and yes I think it would be almost good if I could fast forward to the operation and it was finally here because the waiting or feeling in limbo is pretty hard.  

      Thanks for your response I really appreciate it : )

  • lynne210668
    lynne210668 Lilylou1

    Posted

    Hi Lilylou

    I had my right hip replaced last Monday, leading up to I was excited to get it done and get my life back but the week before was hell!. I was scared and slept even less and I wasn't sleeping much anyway! I got to the hospital hoping it would be a morning slot but it ended up being 2.30pm so more time to stew. The anaesthetist was brilliant putting my mind at ease and when I went down he was making me laugh and then I was away!! I was my worse enemy but what did help was constant texts to my besties and children while I was waiting. All the staff were wonderful and now less than a week after I'm nearly pain free and looking forward to hopefully having my left hip replaced and getting my life back, I'm 50 and I really wish I'd had mine done sooner because the last few years have been painful and time with my children has been wasted. It is scary but try to look forward and these surgeons are experts and confident in what they do and you deserve to get your life back and your pain gone. Sending a big hug x

    • Lilylou1
      Lilylou1 lynne210668

      Posted

      Wow your experience and the outcome sounds good! I know what you mean when you say own worst enemy that’s me in my head with my thinking! Thinking of everything that can go wrong my biggest fear is blood clots followed by a heart attack or stroke!

      Getting my life back is true I have minimised the impacts of living like this to everyone. My walking gait has changed, I can’t walk far anymore. The way I sit on the toilet has been impacted. Getting in and out of my car. Riding a bike I can’t do. I park strategically. So many impacts!  I still work out, go to work, clean my huge house i was down on the floor cleaning yesterday it’s just harder. I have worked so hard at being positive and getting on with it. Xx

    • Charlie2018
      Charlie2018 Lilylou1

      Posted

      what condition is your hip in now lilylou1? mild, moderate, severe?
    • Lilylou1
      Lilylou1 Charlie2018

      Posted

      Hello there,  it’s severe. The socket no longer looks like a socket and everything has crumpled in on itself.  I had someone with me and when they saw the X-ray they were furious as we had  been saying our main concern is this becoming a more complex operation due to deterioration and that’s exactly what has happened. The CT scan is this Wednesday to see just how complex it is now to get a better look at it. The thing is I don’t present myself as the X-ray looks if that makes any sense, I appear active but I know my limitations and don’t generally discuss these with others. I don’t go walking with my family because to the letter box limping is all I can sustain and my youngest is 16.
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