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In February 1987 I was involved in a very minor road traffic accident. At very low speed in heavy traffic I was shunted from behind, resulting in extensive damage to the LandRover I was driving, and unpleasant reaction with my body. At the time of the accident I went into autopilot to prevent other vehicles becoming involved. I noticed that I was very unsteady on my feet, but only after everyone else had left and I attempted to get back in the vehicle did I discover a real problem; loss of feeling and bladder incontinence to a marked degree. When finally seen by a GP I was told it was only a little whiplash, and a few days rest would cure it. I was finally X rayed in June following an episode while visiting a relative in hospital. Damage in the form of minor fractures was found on the pelvis and two vertabrae. The good news is I am mobile, and work a full week. However I have endured 6 years in a spinal corset, take 150mls of Tramadol and no less than 250mls codeine daily to function, still suffer bladder and bowel problems, and sleep in short bursts for a maximum of 2 hours at a time. My GP does not consider my condition to be a cause for concern, despite having received a settlement in court for the injuries sustained (just last year)! I am told that I can continue to increase the amount of codeine and paracetamol I take by a further 20% daily and people of 55 do tend to suffer incontinence problems so I should learn to put up with them.
Perhaps I should take my courage in both hands and risk the operation I am told might relieve the pain. Or leave me wheelchair bound. I have contemplated in an academic way the idea of suicide, but life is so very precious. Grown men don't cry. I am expected to smile and be cheerful, because I always used to smile and be cheerful. I'm not supposed to feel sorry for myself ever. After all, think of all those so much worse off.
I don't like drugs. But I am now addicted to my pain killers. I would like a few days completely free of pain. I won't risk surgeons experiments. So, I'll just have to put up with it, smile and say, "No I'm fine, really I am". And go on screaming inside.
[i:6ccdcc8b50]This message was automatically imported from the original Patient Experience[/i:6ccdcc8b50]
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