Is having herpes really that bad?

Posted , 2 users are following.

So I contracted genital herpes a year ago. Never in my life, i have thought that I would contract any std. I still remember listening to a podcast about a girl who contracted genital herpes few years ago. Who would have guessed that I would get it few years after. I did 2-3 tests and it was negative and I thought I was good but then I decided to test it the last time to be sure. Just when I wasn't expecting any different result from the last one, I was informed it's positive. My world came crashing down. I feel okay when there's no outbreaks. It helps to make me forget that I'm infected, that I have the virus. but when I get outbreaks, it just brings me down everytime. Sometimes I even think that I might have other stds like hpv, hiv or aids and I still think about it from time to time. Anyway, the outbreaks is actually manageable if you take the medicine on time. I guess the scariest part of having this virus is that we could pass this virus to others and how others would like at me if any of them finds out? How do I tell my partner? How do I tell my family? Do I tell my insurance agent? Is it going to affect my life insurance? It's a disease that nobody talks about and you can't talk about it to anyone. i had two outbreaks in a month last month. I realised if you take the medicine on time, it really helps to stop the outbreak. I try to tell myself that this virus is just like a fever you get it from time to time and you could pass it on to someone else but just because nobody told you a "fever" is a virus that will stay in your body forever and it's "sexually transmitted", it's somehow acceptable. I try really hard to think it's actually not that bad. it's just perceived by some people as a social and sexual death sentence (part of me still thinks like this) but if herpes is serious in any sense at all it is because of the stigma, not the condition itself. It's true but it still hurts because society portrays people with std as dirty and promiscuous. I bet I'd think the same if I haven't contracted it.  So then I come here and read some of the discussions posted by people who've contracted herpes or suspects themselves of contracting it, and most of them are like, "I want to die", "I'm really afraid"..I mean it's fair enough to feel that way.. but it makes me think that I'm diseased, it's a scary disease and it's not acceptable in any way. It's a battle of thoughts that goes on in my head. i think this virus does more damages in the mind than skin. 

1 like, 5 replies

5 Replies

  • Posted

    There is no need to tell anyone. Practice safe sex and no sex for ten days with OB. I'm not sure about where you are but where I am the HSV test is not part of the STD panel. It's only done if requested so it's not that serious. It's just luggage that gets heavy once in awhile.

    • Posted

      Sometimes we don't have a choice. We'll eventually have to tell people we date and generally, most people can't keep their mouth shut. That is why some people choose to just be alone. You are right, it's not life threatening, it's just a nuisance. Like I said it does more damage to the mind than skin. 

    • Posted

      Even if you practice safe sex it can still be passed on so you would need to tell anyone you wanted to sleep with 
    • Posted

      Exactly. Which is why it means something if your partner choose to stay. 
  • Posted

    Yes you are right some day you will need to tell the guy you fall for. I have learned to make sure he is worth telling.

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