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just over 12 months ago my wife began accusing me of constantly arguing with her over every little thing.
Heaven help me if I tried to say I wasn't arguing.
She seems to criticise everything I say or do, calling me an idiot, a d******d, an argumentative drama queen, etc etc.
It seriously messes with my head because I know I do tend to defend my actions with reasoning, but as soon as I try to explain my reasons she cuts me off, never letting me finish and shouting at me to stop arguing!?
I will wait for her to stop and calmly try to explain my reasoning behind my actions but she cuts me off before I can get three words out.
Two nights ago I fell very sick from heatstroke. I had been working in the sun all afternoon without drinking water and got so sick I couldn't move without feeling like throwing up. She claimed I was being a drama queen and intentionally got sick to get attention off her!
I forced myself to move and help her with a job she was doing, and even when i did end up throwing up she thought I had stuck my fingers down my throat to be sick on purpose! ... if only because I was seriously in a bad state.
Tonight she angrily called me an idiot and I reacted with my own anger and walked out.
She is just over 50 and I am wondering if she is getting menopausal.
My adult son has told me I make her worse because I put up with the abuse instead of leaving her. He reckons I need to leave so she gets the message but I promised her I would never leave her (she is pretty co-dependant).
i don't want to leave, not just because I gave my word, but because she is my soul mate, my angel and I love her dearly. God knows she has put up with me all these years as well. But it is now at the point where I don't know how much more I can take. I have seriously contemplated suicide after a couple of the worse heartbreaking insults and bouts of abusive mind-f*cks.
Of course, I cannot go ahead because that would also break my word to never leave her.
I have mostly gotten through the fights by agreeing with her, taking the blame for the arguing, even though any logical person would see I was not to blame and often not even arguing.
Am I making it worse by giving in to her?
I am not 'allowed' to have a differing opinion anymore (on stupid things, like where to plant a tree, or a choice of words in a letter). I feel emasculated. I swallow my pride and try to ignore my ego and my hurt at her insults.
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