Is it schizophrenia?
Posted , 8 users are following.
Hi everyone, I'm new and in a bit of a crisis. My name is Alyssa I'm suffering from hallucinations at the moment. Does this sound like schizophrenia symptoms? (sorry that this is long, haha):
All my life I have had hallucinations, from simple shapes, outlines and voices to animals, people and conversations. I also have a habit of being paranoid; I often feel like someone is out to kill me, like someone has planted these thoughts in my head on purpose to see me suffer, that some of the people reading this are out to stalk me. It makes me feel like crying out of fear sometimes.
Back to my hallucinations - I can see spirits watching me from my window (they are here right now), a person sitting beside me on the sofa, a sweet little parrot on my shoulder and many others. I am also friends with a huge black bear called Beast, who is aggressive, demanding and attempts to encourage me to kill/harm people and, at times, myself. There is also a male deer called Maurice, who can stand on his hind legs and encourages my paranoia by making up situations (the people I love pushing me to suicide, being alone etc.). These situations feel so real that I get confused sometimes.
I am failing in my grades, fear my friends and family and have no motivation to do the things I used to love. Please help me.
~Alyssa
0 likes, 34 replies
Patient redlight
Posted
Hello redlight,
We note from a recent post which you have made to our forum that you may be experiencing thoughts around self-harm. If we have misinterpreted your comments then we apologise for contacting you directly. But if you are having such thoughts then please note that you are not alone in this, and there are people out there that can help.
If you are having these suicidal thoughts then we strongly recommend you speak to someone who may be able to help. The organisations below can help you explore your options, understand your problems better, or just be there to listen. If you are having such thoughts then please do reach out to one of these organisations who will understand what you're going through and will be able to help.
There are several helplines in the US which can help you.
They include the Crisis Call Center on Phone: (800) 273-8255;
Hopeline Network on Phone: (800) 422-HOPE (1-800-422-4673)
and the National Suicide Prevention Hotline on Phone: (800) 273-TALK (1-800-273-8255).
Please do reach out - there are many good people who can help.
For users outside of the USA please have a look at this page https://www.befrienders.org/directory
Kind regards,
Patient
borderriever redlight
Posted
Read below from Patient, also make an appointment to see your GP
Good Luck
Here to help
BOB
redlight borderriever
Posted
I can't see a GP since 1.) my mum does not believe in mental illnesses and 2.) I'm not at the age where you can see a GP by yourself. This is my last resort.
borderriever redlight
Posted
harriet67221 redlight
Posted
harriet67221 redlight
Posted
cindy80253 redlight
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Call 911 if that's your emergency code. Tell them you feel like hurting yourself and others, then the operator will decide who to send to help you no matter what your age is. Your parents cannot stand in the way and denie you help if you take that route. You will get immediate help if you tell the responders that your very serious about the situation. Please reach out..............
hedda99 redlight
Posted
Are you in the UK? Are you in your teens? If so you don't need a parent to go to the GP, you can make the appointment and go yourself.
borderriever redlight
Posted
Are you ok,
Have you tried to get help, your Mam should be able to help you especially if you are not well
maria38027 redlight
Posted
redlight
Posted
Since I have so many replies I'll reply like this instead of spamming the discussion:
@borderriever Yes I am fine at home. It just feels difficult to talk to my mum about my mental state. She is a great mum and I love her but when the topic comes to my mental state she kinda passes it off as a hormonal problem since I am 14. In fact with mental illness in general, from what I've heard her say, she seems to not take it too seriously (she thinks people with anxiety are overreacting, that depression is a normal part of life etc). She also threatens to send me to Uganda (an African country and my homeland) for a year if I don't start getting better grades, saying that it'll "sort me out". That's why I'm talking to you lot instead of family.
@harriet67221 I'm 14 and in the UK, and I can't see a GP by myself until I'm 16. I don't want to kill anyone nor myself, my voices are telling me to do it. I try not to listen. Someone put these voices in my head on purpose for whatever reason. They're reading my mind. I can't even think properly without the fact that I'm not the only one thinking it poking me at the back of my mind.
@cindy80253 I'm scared to call social services or 911 because my mum and eventually my family will find out. My mum could send me to Uganda and away from all my friends. I have lived in the UK my entire life.
@hedda99 I'm 14 and in the UK you have to be 16 or over to make an appointment by yourself. If I want to see a GP I have to either get my mum's authority on it or wait 2 years. I don't think I can do either.
@maria38027 Yeah, it's difficult to be open with her. She's very stubborn sometimes too. I haven't told her about my voices, only about my paranoia. She thinks it's a phase due to my hormones but it's been there for years. It's FRUSTRATING. I think she does this all to convince herself that there's nothing wrong with her daughter. My older sister is perfectly fine, she got straight A's and B's in school and she has a successful career, so then having me with could-be-better grades and a could-be-much-better mental state is a big leap, especially since I'm the only one in my entire family line with problems like this. It feels awful really.
hedda99 redlight
Posted
redlight - yes you can go to the GP on your own in the UK - you do not need your parent's permission. It's a mistake to think you have to be 16. Phone them tomorrow and make an appointment.
redlight hedda99
Posted
They might find out if I get sent to a hospital. And my sister is always at home so if I go out for an appointment she'll know. I'm sorry if I seem difficult but I'm just so lost. There's no way out.
hedda99 redlight
Posted
Do you have a friend you can say you are going to visit? Just say you are going somewhere else. Or even if she does know - she can't stop you from going. And the GP will keep everything confidential (unless they believe you are at immediate risk of harming yourself or others). And you are getting way too ahead of yourself talking about hospitals! Try to bring things back to the present - you need to actually see someone first!
Nobody can prevent you from seeing a GP. It is your right. There might be an argument but they can't physically prevent you from going. You can even tell the GP that your family does not take mental illness seriously - I think they should be aware that you don't have the support at home that you need.
Be brave and make an appointment. Nothing is going to change otherwise.
maria38027 redlight
Posted
harriet67221 redlight
Posted
You have rights under the Human Rights Act and the Childrens Act. Whilst your mother may be in denial about your as of yet undiagnosed condition she herself is at risk of being identified as abusing/blocking your right to medical care and attention. You are 14 but you still have rights.
Personally I think you need to get away from this tyrannical rule.
The voices you talk about that were put there are signs of being ill , under a lot of pressure and it is no wonder that you are feeling unwell at his difficult time in your young life.
You will get away from this misery, be patient. It will pass. You are an adult in the eyes of the Law in 2 years time and then can make MORE choices about your life. You may meet someone who can help you more but in the meantime you need to survive, you need support. Please seek the help of a dr, even change surgeries if u fear your mother will intervene, the dr has met these situations before and he or she knows exactly what to do, how to handle your mother. Have u got a friend who can approach your dr and ask for a home visit? Take care and keep writing to us. x
borderriever hedda99
Posted
It is sixteen in the UK, We discussed this a while back at a PPG meeting. Some Surgeries have a special web page for teens to get them used in using the Practice Web page.
On other sites we had to be careful regards age in fact our contributions were taken down.
Hedda could phone the GP Reception, and find out how the Practice stands. although medications prescribed are restricted by age.
Sorry
BOB
maria38027 redlight
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harriet67221 maria38027
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Hi I doubt it will get to that stage.Priority is to see a dr to talk thru problems , the dr will not be sending 14 year old into hospital. No beds anyway lol!! I think rl just needs someone who will listen to her that's all! Sorry to discuss RL but just trying to reassure her and encourage her to see the dr. Thanks xx
hedda99 borderriever
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harriet67221 hedda99
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Hi Hedda That is my understanding as well. I trained as nurse. I hope Rl does keep the appointment and opens up to the dr. Doctors have seen these situations before and know the avenues open they can take to help the 'child'. My daughter at the age of 14 saw her doctor alone btw.
xx