Is my family making my anxious?

Posted , 5 users are following.

I've been diagnosed with an anxitey disorder and I've been on Citalopram for the past year. I've had no problems with it and my anxiety and agoraphobia almost dissapeared . In the meantime I developed strategies of managing stress and I had a peaceful daily life. Last week my family visited me in London for the first time. I'm from another EU country and I've been living and studying in London for the last 8 years. I have observed that when I go back in my hometown and family home I experience anxiety. However I was looking forward for this visit and I've made plans to have a great week. The day of their arrival I was very anxious and felt overwhelmed. To make the story short, I had a quite stressful week which affected my appetite (this is something I struggle with everytime I'm stressed). The day they left, when I put them on the bus for the airport and headed bak home I started sobbing really bad. I had a terrible couple of days with very low mood, no appetite, feeling emotional and anxiety. I had bad thoughts about losing them and felt hopeless, plus a bit guilty about not really enjoying their visit. I start to recover now but I was very scared as these bad emotions brought me back to the days I couldn't function at all and decided to go to the doctor.It's not that I'm homesick or I miss them as it's not my best to go back. For some reason I feel uncomfortable around them although we don't have any serious issues as a family. What's wrong with me? How can I find peace and enjoy my interactions with them or at least not feel a mess when I go back? 

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7 Replies

  • Posted

    do u know what, in a way jm glad I read your post.

    I feel the exact same way around my parents, since I got hit with anxiety and depression, I avoid seeing them , I just feel very stressed around them and uncomfortable for some reason. I feel really bad about it too, because I think they are starting to notice that I'm avoiding them.

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  • Posted

    Hi dear. Its exacly my problem and first strong anxious I had when my mom came to visit me. Then its repeited when i came back home. Its very strong emotions when u dont see ur family for long time and u dont used to them any more and when they come to u its even worst as its ur responsebility to make them comfortable and be happy. So, nothing is wrong with u, u just become independent but u can help urself in this situations...oranising urself better and dont expect a big joy, take it like a work when ur family coming.

    Last thing is increasing the dose of ur medicine for difficult period, that deffenetly works..so..good luck, darling, u will learn and be ok and u will find a moments to enjoy ur family.

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  • Posted

    Thank you for your responses. I truly thought I wouldn't get any. I believe that medication helps in anxiety disorders but in such situations of occasional anxiety around certain situations or people it's best to discover with a psychotherapist the reasons why someone reacts this way. I'm already in a lower dose of citalopram as I'm about to stop it since I feel ok. Maybe is a phobia of growing up or feeling judged. To be honest I stayed on the medication part and didn't seek psychotherapy as my doctor suggested. I think it's time for that now in order to gain control and get done with these bad feelings once and for all. 
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    • Posted

      Yes. Medication is a true treasure for most of us, but we also need to talk through our problems since those (rational or irrational) are what is the cause of our anxieties deep down.
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    • Posted

      Thats the attitude.  I believe by you seeking professional help you can get to the real root of the problem our distorted thinking about situations in life.  I hope you get what you need from counseling, and have a wonderful life!
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    • Posted

      Very true.  But I believe that some of may need to keep taking medications.  People that have bipolar or schizophrenia, could not get by with counseling alone.  Just something to consider.  Some people my have organic brain damage from severe drug/alcohol abuse and may need to continue taking medication.
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  • Posted

    Yes, totally normal.

    When my anxiety started back up (been off medication for almost 3 years and just recently had to go back on), my doctor told me that it was stress. I told them I wasn't stressed about anything but that we had been talking about moving to Florida which I was excited about. She said "dear, stress doesn't always have to = bad. Good "stress" like getting married is a fun time but it still can be overwhelming to the system if it's a big change. It's likely that you ARE excited that your family is coming and SAD to see them go, and it's a overwhelming feeling therefore it's causing your anxiety to flare up. It is totally normal and there is no reason to feel guilty for it. I know, way easier said than done, but It. Is. Normal.

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