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I've been diagnosed with an anxitey disorder and I've been on Citalopram for the past year. I've had no problems with it and my anxiety and agoraphobia almost dissapeared . In the meantime I developed strategies of managing stress and I had a peaceful daily life. Last week my family visited me in London for the first time. I'm from another EU country and I've been living and studying in London for the last 8 years. I have observed that when I go back in my hometown and family home I experience anxiety. However I was looking forward for this visit and I've made plans to have a great week. The day of their arrival I was very anxious and felt overwhelmed. To make the story short, I had a quite stressful week which affected my appetite (this is something I struggle with everytime I'm stressed). The day they left, when I put them on the bus for the airport and headed bak home I started sobbing really bad. I had a terrible couple of days with very low mood, no appetite, feeling emotional and anxiety. I had bad thoughts about losing them and felt hopeless, plus a bit guilty about not really enjoying their visit. I start to recover now but I was very scared as these bad emotions brought me back to the days I couldn't function at all and decided to go to the doctor.It's not that I'm homesick or I miss them as it's not my best to go back. For some reason I feel uncomfortable around them although we don't have any serious issues as a family. What's wrong with me? How can I find peace and enjoy my interactions with them or at least not feel a mess when I go back?
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