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What makes me uncomfortable
· When being aggressive or hateful toward the dogs, sometimes treat them with what for me is violent and some violet language too, on front of the kids. Sometimes suggesting that he can kill the dog himself.
· Sometimes, when I say something…he says… “are you stupid or what”
· When our son who rarely gets an 8 and all his degrees are above 9.4, gets a 9.2, is asked why didn’t he get a 10 instead as 9.2 is not good enough for him (my son cries and says why daddy wants him to be perfect)
· When he tells the kids to p*ss off
· If the kids don’t like the food, he says to shut up and eat
· When he requires something from me, sometimes, quite often tells me he doesn’t care, leave what you are doing and do what I say
· Sometimes I feel I have lost myself in my marriage… now I am even unsure if what happens at home is normal or not, I feel it is not.
· When I am driving, there is sometimes, rages of anger if I missed a road, with high tones of voices, as If I am stupid…. I get very stress and my legs kind of shake…. I never had an accident or even scratch a car. With kids in the back.
· If I pick something in the shop he may object for any reason, or I feel so this way, im not sure if this is normal or not… but I feel I need to ask for approval…I am trying to do it without it but kind of expect it.
· I feel, and I stress this because I am so unsure… I feel that he picks on me… as to find faults.
· I feel, and express… that nothing of what I do is enough to make him happy, no matter if it is work (we work together) or if It is household… it feels that is never enough.
· When he requests something the whole family has to follow, but to a request of mine as have clean feel before putting them in the sofa… seems to be like if I am bothering (maybe, you never know).
· I have explained the kids that our family is not normal, when I ask if they knew why… the said… the lies, the insults and something else I don’t remember. This was like a kind of wake up…
· My child was expressing the discomfort about daddy talking to him the way he did… so I said, you didn’t like It I guess? He said no… and the way he talks to you… However they love their dad.
Excesive phonecalls during the day.. some of them without any reason, only to say whatever...sometimes it is too much.
But at the same time I think he is a good father and get very confuse with the loving behaviour and the so many times he says that he loves me… and then this behaviour. I am not saying this is an everyday thing, but it is something rather frequent, my children say that they see me constantly stress and I am wondering if this thing above has any kind of effect in my level of stress… In front of everyone he is very friendly and all looks really fine, but I am embarrassed to tell my friends or family this kind of things… sometimes I feel I am living one life, the one that goes outside my house and the one that goes inside it…. Im not saying it is hell because I would be lying, but I have this feeling that something is not right and are trying to figure out if I am misguiding my judgement or if simply I have fallen out of love and are looking for excuses. I just would like to have an external point of view and impartial that can help me to see what is really going on. as I feel very guilty of feeling like this… as ultimately he is not a bad person. I don’t know… I’m just very confuse….
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