It's hard when you see someone twice your age more physically able.

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Last weekend my grandad came down to visit us.  He drove 4 hours by himself.  Then the next day came out with us playing crazy golf, walking round, up some steps.  Then straight out for dinner. Back to ours then playing games and driving back to his B&B 45mins away.  He's 76yrs old.

I'm 36yrs old. Can't travel for more than an hour in a single day.  Can't do the crazy golf or even walk round the crazy golf.  Had to use my mobility scooter so couldn't do the stairs.  Was shattered mentally and physically after the crazy golf cos it had been difficult steering around the crazy golf course (it was inside).  Struggled through the meal, they couldn't have dessert cos I couldn't manage at the table any longer.  We went back to ours I went straight to bed (6.30pm). I then had a stupid night of being awake until 1am.

Loved seeing my grandad but it's hard emotionally when he's more physically and mentally able than me.sad

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  • Posted


    As someone who also can no longer do many things that I used to be able to do, I know exactly what you mean. Especially since I used to look after my health; it feels unfair when I see people abusing their bodies and seeming to get away with it.

    But remember that there are still a lot of things that you can do and probably you have developed valuable new skills, which others don't have.

    It is good to be able to acknowledge your feelings and to get them out. Do you have access to counselling? It is natural to compare ourselves with others, but it is important to be able to see the positive things in ourselves also. 

    Feel proud of your Grandad - what an inspiration he is.

    best wishes 

    • Posted

      Thank u. Yeh, he is doing well. Lives on his own, in a house and loves driving trains.

       No I don't have any counselling. Guess I'll have to watch my moods.  Was just thinking 'the end of another day of pain'. Suggests My mood is slipping. 

      I have to admit I haven't really looked after my health. So many foods I don't like. If I try to eat them I'm physically sick ( is that a CFS/ ME thing ?) never smoked or drank Alchol though. Loved sport. 

      It's just that as a kid I could do 19 mile walks, loved sport, helped build our house extension and used to lift building materials around.

      just a tough moment seeing what a 76 yr old could do which I can't, but I had a good laugh about it with my hubbyrolleyes

  • Posted

    Yes i completely agree! I live with my grandad hes 77 & my mother is 51, both have 100% more energy then me and im 22. Its an uncomfortable feeling like what am i capable of

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