Just feel like I'm struggling now and I just wanna cry
Posted , 5 users are following.
I probably sound pathetic and I know that i am..but the job I was hoping to get to leave college and be done with all that didn't work out..even though I was told I have a job and they would contact me soon regarding my starting date I call back and they say the job I applied for doesn't exist..wtf..and now I have to go back to college until I find another job.. and I just hate it there..I have no friends since there all either working going to a different college or doing university..and I have a horrible teacher but the thing I hate the most is the damn bus journeys it's in the city and I live in the country so it's pretty far and I always get back home really late and I constantly worry on the bus that I might have a panic attack like I have in the past and it's all just so stressful and I hate having to keep going to keep college for nothing cause I have to do something while I'm still looking for a job cause my parents say so and I just hate it all and now I'm stuck in thoughts of worry and thinking things are hopeless and more than once now I've panicked while eating so I'm unable to swallow so I have to like cough it out its awful..and I hate that I've gone from getting better feeling alright most of the time now with just little worries to constant sad thoughts and fear thinking today and yesterday..I feel awful..like I could panic at any moment and I just wanna cry I'm sorry for being pathetic I just feel I have to express these feelings..
1 like, 9 replies
jan34534 Nevman1999
Posted
I'm so sorry you're feeling so down. And I am very glad that you are expressing your feelings. It's not good to keep things bottled up inside you.
A couple of questions…
1. Is there anyway you can speak with a counselor about this? It really helps to vent to somebody in person who can really help you.
They see your situation every single day and know how to help you get on the right path and reduce your anxiety, sad thoughts, fear of panic,etc It really helped me a lot! There may even be a counselor right at your school and remember they have to keep all your information and conversations private by law.
2. ...Is there anyway you could do online courses? Then you would not have to Travel for school.
You do not sound pathetic. Many many people go through this so please do not lose hope. Things have a way of working out even though it seems like it takes A long time. You may have to go over some bumps before you get to where you need to be in life.
being your age is a pretty tough time in a persons life sometimes. They are trying to find their way in life and sometimes things get in the way. Please keep that in mind because when you are older you will look back and say to yourself "yes, that was a bit of a hill to climb, but now I'm done with all that and I am where I should be in life and happy. ". Your perspective will change about everything as you get older. So hang in there! Try to find some resources like the counselor that could help you with this.
There are some awesome meditations on YouTube for anxiety, depression, sleep, just about anything you want! I listen to them every day especially when laying down to sleep. I think they could be helpful for you!
When you're feeling anxious you need to focus on your breathing. This is important because it teaches you how to be in the present moment and away from everything that creates anxiety for you.
Search on YouTube for " mindfulness breathing guided meditation 10 minutes"
listen carefully to it and use earbuds if you have them.
YouTube also has sounds that relax you like ocean sounds, rain and storms, Forest, etc. all these meditations are great because they distract you from negative thinking
which reminds me a really good one for you would be "detachment from overthinking" and "clearing subconscious negativity"!
you're going to be OK and take one day at a time. Try not to take life too seriously like I did. Be very good to yourself because this is not your fault! Remember to laugh and smile! You're going to have a bright future! 😁??????
Nevman1999 jan34534
Posted
Thank you I really hope I'll be over this one day and yeah I have a therapist I see every Thursday but I've had a 2 week break from her to see how i would get on as it seemed I was getting better but the last few days just not been too good and yeah I'll be seeing her tomorrow and I've been trying meditation and I do feel it helps but I get stressed sometimes thinking I'm not even doing that right haha..but yeah I'm doing my best but i still can't help but worry..I hope my future will be a happy one thanks for the support. 🙂
Nevman1999 jan34534
Posted
Oh and about college..I'll manage just alittle longer until I find another job it's hard but I'll do my best
9999 Nevman1999
Posted
You sound depressed and very stressed out.
When I was going to college I didn't have friends either what I did was watch YouTube pranks in the hallway bench while waiting for my next class. I had a fun time while waiting for my class. I was sad sometimes but I got through it. Just stared at the screen of my ipod touch. You can watch music videos or search for things online. Play games on your phone.👍You are not pathetic at all you are depressed that's why you are feeling this way. Remember you have friends even though they may not be their personally you have them. 
Best of Luck to You!💖🙏🙌👍
Nevman1999 9999
Posted
cat196111 Nevman1999
Posted
Nevman1999 cat196111
Posted
mimibrenda Nevman1999
Posted
Nevman1999 mimibrenda
Posted
Yeah I have amazing friends and I feel I can talk to my mum about it abit but not really my dad and yes I have a therapist I see every Thursday but despite all this I still very often lose hope I'll keep doing everything I can though..thanks for the comment ?