Posted , 3 users are following.
Not sure on anything really, just need to don't really know either. Had OHS phone call on Thursday following refferal from my manager for advice due to my behaviour/things I;ve been saying which I don't remember. Anyway cutting it short answered her questions honestly, the normal questionaire about suicidal feeling/worthlessness etc over the past two weeks. I could tell she was getting worried then a anxiety questionaire which I;ve never had before the last question was "If I told you you would die in the next hour what is your answer" mine was relieved. she then said I will have to contact your GP, talk to your manager as I was a high risk then ring me back I just said ok. I don't really care plus. Why can't I lie? it would save a lot of hassle, except all the hiding away my emotions, feelings, that has happened over the years I have hidden has caused all these problems so be honest. The call back was contact my GP for an emergency appointment and shouldn't be at work which I lost it then as I wouldn't be paid, my GP/CMHT/psychaitrsit all say I'm better off at work it give me something to concentrate on, occupy myself I rhought I was doing ok over the past months apart from a few hiccups. Saw GP he gave me medical certificate saying I am fit for work. My boss wants an opinion from human resorces who he couldn't get thorugh to for advice. i;ve been in contact with the union too.
I've been busy all weekend, exercising, walking socialising even cookedm yself a meal no wonder the snow is low down on the mountains. Plucked up the courage to light a fire as I am scared of opne fires. Today is a year aniversary of the death of my mother just remembered that I don't feel anything of that either. Dreading work tomorrow want ot just tell them to stuff it, if they are going to give me hassle which I cannot cope with, sorry I'm rambling now been on the sauce as dreading tomorrow. Is life really worth all this heartache and hassle??????
2 likes, 8 replies