Keep having accidents, so worried...

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I am a 28 y/o female with 2 kids, aged 4 and 19 months. After giving birth to my second child, I started having some incontinence issues and I went to my GP surgery and saw the nurse, who said I probably had stress incontinence, which can be common after pregnancy and childbirth, etc. etc. I wasn't too worried or surprised, since I had pretty much guessed that for myself anyway! She told me to do Kegels exercises and avoid fizzy drinks and caffeine, and having followed the advice, things improved somewhat.

Lately, I've had a reccurence of the same issue, but it has been MUCH worse. I will be out and about and suddenly I feel like my bladder's absolutely bursting and I desperately need to pee. If I don't get to a loo within a minute or even less, then it just comes out.

I've also starting wetting the bed - it sounds totally ridiculous, but I'll wake up and it's already 'too late'. All the usual tricks, like going to the loo right before I sleep, not drinking right before bedtime etc. just don't work.

The thing which is freaking me out most is that yesterday, my 4 y/o bounced on top of me and my bladder just emptied - I didn't even feel it. It was bizarre! The same thing happened last week when I picked up a couple of heavy bags of shopping.

I called up my GP surgery but they said it's likely that I just need to do the Kegels more regularly and 'properly'. I am really worried that it is something terrible and I just don't know what to do! Any suggestions?

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11 Replies

  • Posted

    I so feel your pain, I go through the same. I have no control of my bladder. Hospital said mines over active bladder and the exercises won't do anything at all.

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  • Posted

    Hi Izzy,

    ?Make an appointment to see your GP (don't bother speaking to the receptionist on the phone)  and insist that you are referred to a urologist.  There are tests which can determine the cause of your incontinence and it can be cured!  You shouldn't have to put up with this at your age.  Wishing you the best of luck.

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  • Posted

    Izzy.....let me first say this is not uncommon and I am sure its not something terrible.It sounds like urge incontinence,not stress incontinence.  When you say you are doing Kegels are you using a Kegel insert or just exercises?  You really need to see a physio who specialises in these exercises and can teach you,as it can be so easy to get them wrong.  Urge incontinence is where you suddenly just have to 'go'.  Stress incontinence is where you leak when jumping,sneezing,laughing etc.

    You need to see the physio first and then if not successful you need a urogynaecologist,not a urologist or gynaecologist, as this is all concerned with the pelvic floor and possible laxness in the surrounding tissues and muscles,due to childbirth.  As i have said, its very common...you are not alone. At the moment you may have to invest in some Tena pads

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    • Posted

      I think you might be right about it being urge incontinence rather than stress. I do get sometimes little leaks when I cough or something, but the bigger problem is needing to go very suddenly.
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    • Posted

      I have both urge Incontinece and stress Incontinece I have the urge to go all the time and when I do I leak right after wards all over the place and if I cough or sneeze or do anything after I go to the bathroom like normal I spurt a good amount of urine or leak. I wear diapers very often every day and night because the same thjing that happens to me during the day happends to me at night.. So I am always wet.. Do not take any medication for it it will mess you up.. It did for me and I dumped them down the toilet in less than a well cuz I couldn't take it anymore.

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  • Posted

    Thanks so much for your replies. It's just the Kegels exercises I've been doing, but I am pretty sure I do them properly because the nurse who showed me how also does physio sessions and things and obviously knew what she was talking about! I thought they were working - I only used to get little leaks but now it's like properly wetting myself and what's bothering me just as much is the awful feeling of urgency that suddenly comes out of nowhere.

    When I called my GP surgery it was actually a GP I spoke to (they do tel appts) but my usual GP is on leave at the moment and the one I spoke to was a man I don't know. Maybe I should ask to actually be seen?

    The thing I'm most worried about is the two times that my bladder just emptied and I didn't even feel anything. I told the doctor but he said it would happen to anyone if a 4 year old bounced on them! But is it really normal to just totally lose bladder control like that? DD incidentally thought it was hilarious that mummy had wet herself!

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    • Posted

      I think your is mix, stress and urge incontinence. I'm 37 and I can relate to you, for me urge incontinence became much worse after two birth. Just consider urinary system is complex and incontinence depends on different factors like weaker bladder muscles, prolapse, liquids retention, stress, anxiety, irritations, uti, neurological system...and there are many factors that make it worse, like your diet. You and your doctor should look at your past, even before pregnant, to assume the cause. Kegels excercises help, could be a solution or even make it worse, an urologist knows better what is the best for you.

      Anyway, it's not uncommon, I'm sure you will find a solution or at least considerably improve your situation. In meantime I strongly suggest you to remove anxiety and fear of accidents if you have them, that makes everything worse. Absolutly don't let just two bigger accident run your life. Temporarily invest in bigger pads or adult pull-ups if they can give you peace of mind. Maybe it's just a passing thing.

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    • Posted

      Thanks for the advice! I've been using Tena comfort pads but because it's actually hold being able to hold it, not just little leaks, I'm still getting wet. I'm thinking about trying bigger pads but I'm not sure which ones are best to use!

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    • Posted

      You could ask for free sample on the brands websites or in some drug store. There isn't a particular product working for everyone, it depends on your lifestyle too. There are the Tena Pants with different level of absorbency that could be more absorbent than the comfort pads, but are very expensive and you need to undress yourself from the waist down for a change.

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  • Posted

    Izzy,please dont put up with this situation for too long. A urogynaecologist will be able to do tests which can show exactly what is wrong. Then there are lots of options available.  So many women seem to think its one of the things you have to put up with because of childbirth and put off seeing a professional.  You already have been doing the Kegel exercises,which are great for toning up those muscles but sometimes a little extra help is needed.
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    • Posted

      Thanks for the advice! I've actually made an appointment with the GP and they had a cancellation, so I'm going tomorrow. Hopefully I'll be able to get a referral of some sort. I'm freaking out about what they're going to ask me and what they're going to do - you wouldn't think after 2 kids that this would be bothersome, but it still is somehow!

       

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