Knee pain doctors not listening

I'm really sorry to hear about your situation. I understand what it's like going through misdiagnosis or not finding out what's going on, and how awful it feels when a doctor isn't listening. They're a doctor but you live in your body, and we can't always be certain but we know our bodies to an extent and when something they say just isn't sitting right, it's worth pushing to get another answer. And being a doctor by no means makes them perfect or an expert at every condition, or the most experienced in their field, even if a specialist. Unfortunately it may also not always mean they actually care about helping people.

Sometimes they're limited by insurance, sometimes they're just not as experienced and just go 'by-the-book' alone. I've been in that position for various medical issues more than once, and sometimes the answer was found due to my own suggestion on a test or something if they agree to do it, and sometimes finding a doctor who has dealt with that specific thing enough matters. You can get different opinions and answers and methods from each one. It's really frustrating, but also is why you can't give up after one (or sometimes two or more) don't solve your problem or give you a diagnosis that makes sense.

I can't say for sure if your situation is arthritis or if you had damaged something in your knees at some point, or it's a case of another condition that worsened over time. But if they're not even giving you an answer and are unable to treat it and make it better, it seems you're not in the best hands. Not everything can be answered sometimes, but it seems they're not really giving you much at all and aren't able to treat it based on even what they're saying it is.

Hopefully you're able to choose another doctor at least, so that maybe they can decide to do other testing that will then allow them to follow the line of next steps to get you a good referral or further testing until they can figure it out.

I can't offer you any real help, but I know that sometimes support or understanding is important too. I don't know how things work wherever you are, but are you able to choose another doctor within your insurance coverage network? Sometimes it takes finding the right one that listens, has more specific experience, or just cares enough to do more, to do what it takes to actually figure it out. Unfortunately, like I said, sometimes they're limited by what expenses/methods are approved by insurance (at least here in the US), and here in the US it's extremely expensive to get medical treatment on your own.

Often doctors put bandaids on things instead of/before doing what it takes to confirm for sure what they're treating, and that can do more harm than good sometimes. It's cheaper for the insurance that way too.

Is your pain in both sides?

I feel like that's a terrible answer that the doctor gave you, "this is normal at 40." I don't know your history or overall health or how active you were previous to the start of this knee pain a few years ago, but that sounds like a really lazy answer. And people older than you are often able to do a lot more than you're able to. It also seems odd that the ortho denied your referral... Don't give up though... as hard as it may feel at times. Maybe through your own persistence they will eventually let you see a different doctor unless you can choose to.

Have you tried checking out youtube or anything for videos or info from professionals? Sometimes they'll respond to comments, some have live videos where you can ask things on certain days. They may not be able to give too much medical advice that way, and I know it's not the same as going in and being examined and tested, but maybe something is better than nothing for you right now. It could at least help give you more ideas of what to talk to your doctor about or ask. Or the next doctor you go to, if possible.

Hopefully you are able to keep your muscles from getting too weak from being more sedentary for now to keep supporting the joints as best as possible. Depending what's going on, I've heard that certain muscles may be better to focus on building than others, but it's hard to say without knowing what your situation actually is. I've watched a ton of videos from specialists and physical therapists, and building the glutes and not focusing on quads too much seems to be good for certain knee issues, but I can't be sure about yours. Also, depending on condition, it can be difficult to work out muscles many ways at all (I know).

Unfortunately sometimes even with orthos, some can be better than others. I've been to one and am being treated for the wrong condition, a diagnosis of an old condition that isn't the cause of my issue after an injury, as I know what that previous condition is like versus this disabling situation following an injury, but due to lack of seeing something else on MRI, they just stopped there and aren't listening or even able to explain how this is happening due to what they're claiming, either saying they can't say or coming up with very general nonsense. It's insane. MRI isn't even 100% accurate all of the time. I'm hoping to get someone to go in with a scope (in-office, quick diagnostic procedure) to get the best view of the situation. My next hope is that they're very experienced and good at what they do and it will lead to finding the issue and treating it appropriately.

For now, with the lack of diagnosing the actual issue I went in for, I'm supposed to go to P.T. for the condition that isn't the complaint and that I got on just fine with for all my life. Not saying PT couldn't help strengthen supporting muscles but you also have to be careful not to do things that can worsen whatever the missed thing potentially is. Hoping to find someone to figure it out before too long, but it may be a while. An ortho is what I need, just a different one. The nurse practitioner I saw before him (who had to pass me to him) actually made a lot more sense with what she thought it could be, and she understood that it was different than that old condition he is falling back on. He must be too uncaring, not great at his job, or misunderstanding the situation somehow.

I'm going to go elsewhere for another opinion, hopefully it works out. If not, insurance may not cover me to get it looked at further and I'll have to wait until I can get the money to pay out of pocket for another doctor. That's going to be rough considering I'm unable to work now, too, so have to hope to find remote work in the meantime, but can't be sure I will.

Not having strong social/personal support can make such situations much more difficult, so I hope you have someone that can be there for you in the meantime, even if that person can't fix it.

Best of luck. Hopefully you can get answers and treatment, even if you have to keep pushing for it.

I find that sometimes reading other peoples stories of getting properly diagnosed and treated can provide hope. And here I am on forums now, trying to find more. And hoping to come across someone who may have a good referral in my area. But even then everyone has a different experience based on their situation. Hoping to find one as similar to mine as possible.

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