l hate myself because of my drinking

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I'm a nice person and very popular and lots of talents but fatal flaw drink makes me so depressed I wish I was dead (just venting feelings not going to do anything )

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12 Replies

  • Posted

    Sorry DaisyJo, but at my advanced years, 62, I've heard it all before.

    Your self esteem has taken a huge hit and needs an adjunctuntion (sp).

    We are only as good as we need to be in front of our peers...period.

    We rearly don't need to impress anybody but ourselves. The rest will come naturally.

    That said, I just told myself something...duh. gotta put the thinking cap on sometimes.

    Tim

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    • Posted

      Sorry I realise sounds very melodramatic. What I meant to say was my drinking really gets me down .
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  • Posted

    Hi DaisyJo. You will feel better if you try to cut down gradually and gain respect from the people around you. Your first day off drinking and waking up sober is great and you can then do more and more days off drinking with a bit of luck, Hopefully, you should feel better and not depressed. Get advice from this amazing discussion room and let us know how you are coping. Best of luck smile
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    • Posted

      Thanks for being honest.  i always feel like dieing after i tie one on. n usually real strong for about a week then i get pretty happy and glad i didn't do something stupid.  it called alcohol.  i like the saying "how could a bottle of beer control my life".

       

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  • Posted

    you dont need to prove anything to anyone 

    you can stop drinking and get your life back you say it your self you have a  lot of talents make this one ,believe you can.

    get some help from AA so your around others like you 

    dont put yourself insituations where you feel pressured to drink

    DONT let DRINK ruin your life hun .stand firm and get your life back on track 

    no one can do it for you ,they can support you but its got to come from within 

    is all drink or certain types . do you drink to much .or is it just a case of it causing deppresion .

     

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  • Posted

    Thank for replies. Generally not depressed but it's like I have 2 lives - my normal mostly happy life and the other battling drink life. In fact I did a week without a drink at all. Bizarrely I decided to celebrate this achievement by drinking. I should know by now I can't have just one. I wish I could. I would love to be able to enjoy just 1 or 2 drinks but whatever my intentions I will always drink until I can't take any more. I drink medium strength lager, wouldn't dare drink anything stronger but I'm ashamed to say can easily drink 12 plus pints. On a positive note the gaps between binges (which is pretty much any time I drink) are getting longer. I'm determined to overcome this. Anyway thank you everyone who took the time to reply.
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  • Posted

    Hi Daisy Jo...I love how you say you are a nice person. Please continue to believe that because many of us drunks ARE nice people. We just have this urge to drink until we're sh**t-faced. My husband used to say:" You're such a nice person. Why do you need to drink so much?"

    It is a positive thing that the gaps between your drinking are getting longer and is is also a positive thing to realize that your drinking is out of control. Yes, I always rewarded myself with alcohol....If I had a good day, I'd have a few glasses of wine. If I had a bad day, a few glasses of wine...you name it: expecting company...nice weather... bad weather...cut the lawn; always a reward with a few glasses. That was fun in the beginning but toward the end I could never stop with a few glasses. I ALWAYS ended up plastered. Then 15 years ago I joined Alcoholics Anonymous. I don't want to sound 'preachy' but that program and those people helped save my life. It's so wonderful to wake up àfter a party and remember everything. I have my family back and I wouldn't trade my life for anything;especially "a couple of glasses". Good luck, my dear and keep checking these postings for reassurance and support. 🌻

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  • Posted

    hi daisyyo

     Good luck and all the best , Not sure if i can say this here but forget AA  and theyre 12 step bs , The POWER IS WITH YOU.

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  • Posted

    Thank you for your support. I do believe the power is within me. I am actually going to SMART group later although part of me is trying to talk myself out of it!
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  • Posted

    Had a few last night.Havent really got it in for AA; each to their own i say ; its just not for me. Don't know anything about Smart; Good luck to you.
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    • Posted

      Well I didn't go. The thought of sitting with a bunch of strangers after a long day at work for 90 mins talking about drinking made me feel like a drink. I've got my counsellor which is good and I'm doing an anxiety management course. Other than that I think it's best for me to just do stuff I enjoy to get my life back.
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    • Posted

      Can't say i blame you. That's actually one of the reasons i have never been back to AA having gone a few times, many years ago. Of course a lot depends on the other people there , but i didnt feel i was made to feel particually welcome;or maybe it was just me,i don't know . But anyway it just stressed me out , and on leaving i would get completely bladdered .

      Just wanted to say that.... as it would be easy to get down on yourself maybe thinking that you've let yourself down. Well don't. Seems to me you have a pretty good plan of attack  and these places will always be around if we change our minds. Take Care

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