LEARNING NEW WAYS TO COPE.....................

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Thousands are suffering with all types of mental illness,& it's destroying family's relationships,are selfs more to the point....we have to live with are illness 24 hours a day.7 days a week .i have had serious mental health problems for years have been on every medication there is,ect the lot.hospitals you name it I've been there n got the t shirt.lol.

NOW I want to tell everyone about a course through mental health services called coping with your emotions,thought judgements,of yourself n much more......it's really hard work,if you take one thing from this then that is good.


.everytime you judge yourself.which could be 100 times a day eg...I'm useless I'm ugly I hate myself why me.....STOP.GROUND yourself!take a few deeps breaths then say to yourself that was just a judgement & let it go,it came into your mind now let it float out...

......try try over n over....

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  • Posted

    I am so happy to hear about this, Zenna!  I'm in the States and one observation I've made on here is that the MH system in the UK seems to favor treating everything with psych drugs as a first line of treatment.  Those drugs are NOT benign and really ought only to be used temporarily to give a person footing, but then they really need to be taught the kinds of things you mention here.  

    They throw drugs at depression and anxiety caused by life events.  Most people are not truly mentally ill; they just don't have the skills to deal with every day stressors or major events.  And, whatever happened in our pasts that led us to have negative self image, catastrophizing thoughts, etc., it can be undone with the types of skills you mention.  We do develop negative mental chatter and feel we are victims, but all of it is "voluntary."  It is possible to interrupt those thought processes, bring ourselves to the present with breathing, and be kind to ourselves.

    I used to ruminate over the past, worry about the future, causing myself so much distress.  I was depressed because of it.  Our past is a story - there is no physical remnant of it other than in our minds.  We can't predict the future and it is largely not in our control, so fretting over only creates more suffering.  All we have is the present. Most of the time we can honestly say, "At this moment, I am ok."  We dont HAVE to have our thoughts.  That may seem "out there," but it's true!  

    When I catch myself ruminating, I tell myself "thinking, thinking, breathe" 


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    • Posted

      Hi Betty thank you for your kind message,I'm in the uk as u no.there is so much to talk about with mental health.drugs are not the answer in all mental health,problems talking is the key to success,I'm doing a group there called coping with emotions it's really helping a lot it's how we deal with our lives n thoughts,is the way to deal with a lot of stuff that's gone on in our lefts.it's very good .im going to sleep its 1.48 in the morn.........
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    • Posted

      Hope you slept well, Zenna!  I should add that it isn't much better here, though my recent GPs have been anti-drug and pro-therapy.  Just gotta find the right kind of therapy.  I have been in an online-based program called Emotional Brain Training that is about breaking stress circuits and rewiring them by expressing anger, sadness, fear and guilt, identifying the unreasonable expectation, and then replacing it with a reasonable expectation.  We then "grind in" the reasonable by repeating it over and over, like a mantra.  By repeating it 20, even 50 times, it begins to seep in and replace the negative thought processes.  It works!  I used to be incredibly negative, and would get so irritated when people would say "just think positively!"  Well, I'd say I've reduced the negative mind chatter by a bout 90%. It can be done!
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    • Posted

      Hi betsy,yea slept well thanx,how r you?not sure of time difference ?its Sunday evening here in the uk.11.10 pm.there are lots of diffrent therapy.its what your offerd I'm doing a coping with emotions course which is d b t therpy.its for 14 weeks,there's lots of skills & coping strageties to learn,have you heard of mindfulness that is good,it's about getting your mind in the presence moment,into a wise mind.its really hard because it's retraining the way you think and behave,when your suffering you have to try all diffrent things to help.it can be done as you say it's just repeating it over n over till it stays in there.....it's hard I know when other people say think positive if only it was that easy when your overwhelmed with negative thoughts beliefs.we just have to keep learning new &diffrent ways to cope...
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  • Posted

    Just got this from another forum, but it applies here:

    Stinking Thinking

    Stinking Thinking often leads people to feel sad, worried, and hopeless. To feel better, try to “freshen up” your thinking. Here are a number of ideas ...:

    Misery is optional. Feeling miserable keeps you stuck in the past. The past is something no one can change. Focus on changing the things you can and accepting what you have no control over.

    Emotions are not facts. Just because you feel a certain way, does not make it true. Notice when emotions are getting the best of your thoughts and check out the facts first.

    The future is not set in stone. You cannot be certain about what tomorrow will bring. Try to avoid making negative assumptions about the future.

    View “mistakes” as life lessons. Life is full of opportunities to learn new skills, make new friends, and try new activities. Learn from mistakes and do better next time.

    Avoid seeking perfection. Instead, pay attention to progress. "

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