Life feels like a living hell, still no real answers
Posted , 9 users are following.
23, Male, Caucasian, 165 lbs
Hello all,
I'm sure many of you can relate to my story so here goes.
My health has felt like it’s been in the crapper for way too long. When I was 12-13 I was diagnosed with mild GERD (acid reflux). It affected my sleep a little bit from what I remember, but not hugely. Right around this time I also started developing a bit of general anxiety, but again wasn't debilitating. And then, starting around age 16, I woke up one day and noticed I was a little tired for some odd reason. I have been tired ever since that day. Not even a day or a minute of feeling well again. I've gradually gotten tireder and tireder over the course of the past 7-8 years, to the point where I'm at now where I can hardly function because the exhaustion and resulting symptoms have become so debilitating. So basically, my life revolves around me being exhausted. Most of the symptoms below have gradually gotten worse and worse as time goes by.
SYMPTOMS:
· Chronic fatigue that has gradually gotten worse and worse over 7-8 year time span. Never a moment of feeling better. It's to the point where I'm at now where I can hardly function because the exhaustion and resulting symptoms have become so debilitating. So basically, my life revolves around me being exhausted. Used to be more of a fatigue feeling, now it's escalated to bad fatigue plus sleepiness
· Cognitive decline (EX: concentration, alertness, memory, focus, BRAIN FOG, processing/recalling words, etc. Like it’s gotten to the point where I have to often plan what I’m going to say in advance and make sure I get each and every word right.
· Coordination/balance feels out of wack like I'm drunk at times
· Dizzy upon standing often
· Motor skills, hand-eye coordination, spatial awareness have declined sharply
· Feel like I move extremely slow now both mentally and physically
· Extremities/body parts feel so utterly exhausted and numb-like to the touch. Gradual decline as well.
· Head almost always feels very tired and heavy
· Consistent yawning throughout the day
· Dry mouth often. Also increased thirst a bit
· I feel more anxious/stressed easily, where everything feels like a chore
· Feel intoxicated MUCH more easily/quickly. It's been a gradual decline as well
· Have a perpetual drunk-like feeling like I'm not quite in real life. Never fully feel "there"
· Lower sex drive
· Night sweats (have subsided since using CPAP)
· I fall asleep very easily most nights
I do feel slightly better when I wake up as opposed to before I go to sleep, but I suppose that's like everyone
· Acid reflux history, now just minor, off and on (largely subsided)
· Somewhat sensitive to sunlight/bright light. Also get eye floaters
· Not sure if this means much, but the moons on my fingernails are very small/nonexistent
· When I started feeling bad, I noticed I used to be a lot more on edge. So I would get startled and jump easily, got p****d off and agitated easily, stressed/anxious easier, and had no patience for anything. So that spiked for a while, but as I got tireder and tireder most of this stuff went away to the point where I'm a zombie now and don't react to anything.
I have had practically every sort of test done. Blood tests, urinary tests, vitamin/mineral deficiency checks, heart and chest scans, cortisol levels checked. Everything comes back PERFECT and just about everything has been ruled out it seems. I have tried for the hell of it multiple anti-anxiety/anti-depression medications, none of which helped me in the slightest. My diet is healthy, I still try to exercise most days of the week (although it's gotten harder to due to my shear exhaustion). Exercise does not make me feel better or worse. I do not suffer from insomnia. I do not have ADD/ADHD. I do not suffer from any joint pain or any real pain for that matter. I average 7-9 hours of sleep a night and usually fall asleep very easily, although I do usually wake up 1-2 times a night to pee. I stay very hydrated throughout the day.I do not get sick that often, maybe two colds a year, never had mono.
Overall, it feels like I was hit by a truck. From the moment I wake up to the moment I pass out from sheer exhaustion at night. Everything feels like it's suppressed by this fog that has gradually gotten worse and worse over time. For example, caffeine’s effect, sex drive, post-workout adrenaline and endorphins, getting plenty of sleep, etc. I can sort of FEEL all these things for the most part, but it feels hidden and pushed down from this utter exhaustion. It’s like nothing can surpass the fatigue and fog. It's gotten to the point where I feel like I'm living my life from the backseat and am just going through the day mindlessly. I was recently diagnosed with mild sleep apnea (mostly central sleep apnea, not obstructive) and have been using a CPAP machine for a couple months now (haven't noticed a difference yet). I also started using Nuvigil last week to see if that could help with the tiredness but nope, nothing. I also even had an extensive food intolerance test done and am mostly sensitive to kidney beans (rarely eat them though). Every other sensitivity is very mild (barley, cherries, halibut, mushrooms) or nonexistent.
Things I've had done/been tested for:
Blood vitamin/Mineral deficiencies
Magnesium levels
Calcium check
Iron levels (I have slightly elevated ferritin)
Heart and chest scans
Cortisol levels AM & PM
Urinary analysis testing
TONS of blood tests
3 different anti anxiety and antidepressants just for the hell of it
Food allergy testing
Changing diet (Keto, gluten free, dairy free)
h. pylori
Lyme
Mercury/lead poisoning, toxic metals
Testosterone levels
Thyroid panels
Candida
Antibodies
More exercise, less exercise. Don’t feel much different either way really.
More caffeine, no caffeine
******Everything comes back negative. The only things that have come back positive is mild sleep apnea (mostly central sleep apnea (CSA), not obstructive sleep apnea. Been using CPAP for a couple months with no noticeable difference in energy yet. Also just started using Armodadinil (Nuvigil) today. I also have slightly elevated Vitamin B12 and ferritin levels. Not sure if that means anything though. So currently what I am doing/taking is:
Continuing CPAP
Started taking methylated B12 and folate about 6 days ago to see if maybe the problem is with B12 absorption. Has actually maybe made me feel a bit worse
Armodafinil (notice virtually no difference no matter the dosage)
Vitamin D3, Omega-3 fish oil, stopped taking multivitamin last week
Trying to at least exercise a bit, keep a healthy diet.
Have an appointment next week with ENT doctor to rule out anything structurally related
Try yet another anti-depressant/anxiety if nothing else works.
I think I've done pretty much everything short of getting a brain scan, or getting a stool sample, both of which seem kind of unnecessary but who knows.
Any advice/thoughts? What first comes to mind? I am extremely desperate and at my wits end with this s**t...
0 likes, 8 replies
yan50450 james09530
Posted
hmm, I feel your pain.
Have you always lived in the same place before?
Do you feel better when you take a vacation some place else for a week?
lester90053 james09530
Posted
For someone with your problem you have had no difficulty writing your fully detailed story. About half way through I started to become skeptical like you were selling a product. I Hope someone has a better conception and can be of help. Good luck.
AlexandriaGizmo james09530
Posted
I have to be honest you have had multiple diagnostic tests and they have found nothing to warrant all your symptoms, have you been googling Dr Google because your using plenty of disease names that would not have been mentioned to you if you weren't diagnosed with them so that hints to me that your mental health is also having something to do with your symptoms
josh72109 james09530
Posted
I had similar symptoms for 5 years. for me it was a mycotoxin illness. (toxic mold poisoning). There was mold in my family's house that we did not recognize as dangerous.
Jerome13 james09530
Posted
Feeling sick for that long and progressively getting worse warrants a 'DR GOOGLE' search I would say. Some of the replies you have had on here are shocking. Unhelpful at best and damaging it worse. Pay no attention.
Have you looked into ME/CFS much? I would say a lot of your symptoms fit the bill. Also, it might be worth checking out POTS (Postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome) if you haven't already.
mary78142 james09530
Posted
Hi.
Firstly i think it sounds like an Anxiety problem . I dont think antidepressants will help sometimes it can make it worse. I say this out off experience. I no longer take any antidepressants/ it can be Very Hard to come off them/ do this with the help of your G.P. Try a Mindfull App there are sevearal out there/at first you maybe think it is a load of rubbish but persevere.
Secondly with you saying you are sensetive to light etc get checked out for Lupus. Lupus can effect your whole body and mind. Try Blocking out light in a room and get Plenty of rest and see if some of your syptoms get easier.
Good Luck
Beverley_01 james09530
Posted
hi James,
Guess there's a few things come to mind. I have cfs/me so share many symptoms but, one question has to be in all the time you have been ill, have you changed house/area?
Also, was it around exam time that you first got ill?
Do you keep the foods you have a reaction to out of your diet completely?
I can see you are desperate to improve things but, taking vitamins/meds takes time for your body to see results.
Beverley
rachel68819 james09530
Posted
alot sounds like anxiety, which leads to a hypersensitivity to notice every little thing that takes place with your body that seems catastrophic. It is good to be in tune with your body, but when it becomes a laundry list of problems that are all over the spectrum, my impression is it is all stemming from anxiety. After years of dealing with all those symptoms, and you have managed to live through it, I think its fair to say you need to get under the care of a physician to confirm you arent suffering from a life threatening illness and work through all you have going on. GOOD LUCK!