Looking for advice (autophobia)
Posted , 6 users are following.
Hello, as you can see from the name of thread, i guess, i have an autophobia, fear of being alone. Im currently living with a girlfriend and when she arent at home for a long time im having pretty hard period. I dont know my phobia roots, it just happened so fast in the past that i didnt unserstand anything. Im looking for some advice from someone who can help me to go through the one whole day and one whole night of being alone at home. At first I decided not to go for sleep this day, because i think i better stay awake and do something. But maybe there are a guys or girls with an experience who have passed that? Would be very glad to hear from you. I dont fear robbers or something, but its just hard to be alone and i dont know why.
1 like, 8 replies
edwina97301 FishZone
Posted
Hi have no experience of this as I have anxiety , prefer to be alone and isolate. Hang in somebody will reply if not try and ask again maybe tomorrow somebody will see and want to help. Hang in there there's so many different anxietys your not alone. Does sound like something triggered this. A real event or irrational fear. Whatever you deserve help. Good on you for reaching out. Years ago I wouldn't ask for help as I thought l would be seen as strange but learned all these anxieties are common and can be helped??
FishZone edwina97301
Posted
Yeah, somehow knowing that Im not alone still gives me some hope. Thank you for answer mate, Im very glad that you answered me. Will wait for someone or maybe I'll explore the Net for some information.
arthur62818 FishZone
Posted
Hey,
What is your day like? I mean in general, do you work? Do you do any activities? What your thoughts are like? What makes you worry too much?
To better understand your situation and to come up with a plan that will help you, first you need to answer those questions. And did you check with a doctor to make sure there are no other health issues. Of course, you are not alone and I would like to hear from you. And I will try my best to help you out.
For now, leave the house, apartment or whatever and go out some public places or meet friends, I don't know do something where you can stay away from being by yourself.
When we are alone and quiet we get trapped with our negative thoughts without even noticing that and these thoughts circulate so much that eventually, we catastrophize them. Which translates to an anxiety attack.
Looking forward to hearing from you
FishZone arthur62818
Posted
Hey arthur, my day is consists of learning programming language for 3+ hours because i want to write something cool so Im self-studying.
I dont work, because I cant find a job with my profession as programmer. My day is not so colourful with activities, i must say im prone to a quiet passtime.
I dont understand my thoughts. I think they're telling me if I will be alone then you need to find friends and chill with them, but finding friends for me is not a problem, the problem is - when Im alone my mind wants to find a friend but at the same time my emotions are problem, dont know how to explain.
I was on some sessions with doctor but it didnt help. Maybe it was bad doctor. I think I will somehow endure during this day and night, yea, this is stressful but I hope everything is going to be okay.
FishZone
Posted
arthur62818 FishZone
Posted
Yeh, it's a good new that there are no issues with health, the rest is kind of like programming.
I am a programmer myself too and I know what you are talking about. So basically you are attaining a skill where you can manipulate things, you put a piece of code and it does something on the other end (front end). So, why aren't you applying the same principle here?I used to have panic attack myself and I was scared to be alone, I do get that. But I realized whenever I am alone some crazy thoughts ruminate in my head and I force to surround myself with people when I need it. Me too sometimes I want to be alone when I need to read a book or doing some coding, but anytime I code or read I listen to some music, something that keeps my overall mood happy or at least neutral. When I am coding I listen to Paul Oakenfold or something in that nature, so I can concentrate on coding and mean time it's pleasant and your mind is not wandering around. As some friends or someone for some free project that you can hone your skills and you can build your portfolio. Who knows you will find some job down the road, try Fiverr, you should turn every rock on your path and look for opportunity. It won't be easy like getting rid of your anxiety but everything is doable, don't worry.About your thoughts, try to do bust your anxiety with mindfulness. I found it is one the best ways to overcome anxiety. I don't believe in drugs, to me they are just a patch and some people they just love it, I don't have a problem with people taking drugs, it just not my thing. I wouldn't let those harsh chemicals into my body causing some side effects and then I have to think what other drugs should I take now to fight this side effect. Instead of monitoring my mind with pills I rather train my mind and get rid of it naturally and most importantly without side effect. And guess what mindfulness is free, natural and it's available whenever you need, it's within you.Let me know if it makes sense to you.
Pelfers420 FishZone
Posted
Hi FishZone,
There is nothing wrong in being alone. It gives us peace and a moment of relaxation but anything in excess is bad. I just passed this stage and was stuck for quite a while. I didn't want to leave my apartment and just be with myself. I am away from home and was kinda stupid limiting my communication with family and friends. One day, it did hit me. I was totally lonely and paranoid about being alone or having an impending doom.
My 1st reoslution was to talk to God thru prayers. It helped me a lot in going thru depression. 2nd was going out again with family and friends. I consider my apartment just for sleeping. I wanted to breka the routine of home-office-home. I became serious with my work and focused again. Sharing your thoughts thru online or thru personal conversations also helps a lot.
Pax96 FishZone
Posted
I'm just learning this myself. Im also dealing with this & will be watching your thread for help & advice. Thank you for posting