Lost libido after Mental illness

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My wife had a Mental illness stint 2 years ago and after a few months of treatment got back to normal - it repeated a year later and she was then put on correct drugs from the Mental Health Clinic.

Our sex lives were always very, very active for 18 years and for 2 years now she is a completely different person and has lost any interest (except for the once in a blue moon fling between us).

Can anyone recommend how to deal with this...is it a time thing, does she need something to take to boost libido after her mental illness. The drugs she was on and off now were called: Olanzapine

Any advice would be gratefully received.

thank you: Daryl

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4 Replies

  • Posted

    anti psychotic drugs tend to have a side effect of reduced libido in men as well as women so really it is hard to say if there is a solution. Have you tried a sexual therapist. They often have some good ideas of how to improve things
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  • Posted

    Hi Daryl ,i've just read your post and i am that same wife with my husband !!! we have been married 25yrs this year and enjoyed an active sexlife until i started on the long and complex road of meds for depression.I can't remember when i felt my libido stopped because it's just become the norm now for us not to make love because i have no sensations at all in my genital region !!! Thank goodness for our shared love,humour and most importantly communication about it all but i am 49 and feel bereft that such an intimate part of our relationship appears to have gone.Last year i stopped meds (another story) and we did have the odd blue moon moments ( h type 2 diabetic again complex) they were fab.I had another breakdown in feb this year so back on sertraline and now really pushing to see a pyschiatrist for proper assessment.I also feel there are huge hormonal issues happening with me to as ripe for menopause so i am wondering what has happened with you now as you posted a year ago and i want my sexlife back !!! I would be really grateful if you could reply as you have been so honest and brave to post this here.If you want to private message me great but i also completely understand if you don' reply at all Best Wishes


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    • Posted

      Hi Lynne

      Afraid it’s not good news for me. I tried for 4 years and to be honest I feel that the woman I married dissappeared when the mental breakdown happened....only to be replaced by someone who has no connection or passion towards me.

      She came off medication some years back and am now with a person that I really would not have married - as she seems to be a person who has no emotion or physically attachment anymore.

      I have talked, written letters to her - but she can't grasp the problem and blames me (I go quiet with her when I'm totally depressed about everything due to the feeling of rejection and pain I feel).

      Kind of stuck in a hard place due to my girl of 11...I need to make sure that she grows up in a stable enviroment and will not be affected by this, but deep down you know a person can't live without love in their lives.

      Wish I had some happy news and good advice.

      Sincerely: Daryl

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    • Posted

      so so sorry to hear above but all that you have said my husband has said to me,because of how i am i do not read his romantic cues,they are completely lost on me and in the past he has accused me of doing it on purpose cos i just can't be bothered.I am not saying there isn't an element of truth in that last sentence but with all the other symptoms,pressures,family stability your trying to maintain most of the time i am exhausted.However last GP appt i told him that i was dead from the waist down and while i'm not in a place yet to resume sex i'm bloody well determined to make more of an effort .

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