Maybe not Panic/Anxiety attack but....?

Posted , 3 users are following.

Last few years I have had dry eyes, caused mainly by my eyelids opening slightly when I sleep. This results in my eyes drying out in my sleep and causing me to eventually wake up very suddenly with red gritty eyes and mentally super confused.

When this happens I panic as even though I am awake, mentally I am not 100% awake. I live on the 4th floor and I always end up opening the flat window and sticking my head out or going to the balcony to get fresh air. In 3-5 mins I calm down and put some eye drops. This worries my wife in case I fall from the balcony and she ends up suddenly waking up too, following me and calming me down.

In recent times I have stopped panicking because I got used to it a bit and did not see the point of worrying my wife in her sleep. So when it happens I just walk around the flat calmly, apply some drops and go back to bed in 5-10 mins.

After my recent eye doctor trip, I was given a thick gel for my dry eyes. This made my vision blurry instantly and kind of covered my eyelashes with the sticky gel. This caused me to panic a bit first few times but I got used to it too.

Last night though my wife went to toilet and that woke me up. I got up too and although my vision was not too blurry from the gel. I really took my panic stuff to another level!!!! I entered some sort of vicious circle where worrying about my eyes, my wife's cataract, meaning of life, not wanting to ever lose my wife, death, human mortality etc entered my mind. I felt like my heart was speeding up so fast that I would cause a heart attack or something! My legs felt very shaky (psychologically not physically). As my wife was awake she tried calming me but it just would not work.

After 5-10 mins the drama was over an I went to bed. Wife could not sleep for a while as she was so worried. All this is not helping me not being stressed. I need to calm down due to the negative impact on my "Central serous retinopathy" that I was diagnosed with.

Problem is that when awake I have calmed down but when waking up suddenly I seem to be not 100% mentally awake and can't apply logic until I full wake up, which seems to take round 5mins.

Anyway I though I type it here just to get it off my chest.

0 likes, 4 replies

4 Replies

  • Posted

    Btw during this panic/anxiety attacks, all I do is walk from one room to the other worried. So it is not like I am shouting or anything like that. It is just that all the negative thoughts cause a storm in my head until I fully wake up mentally.

  • Posted

    I am sorry you feel this way, and that you have these anxiety attacks, because that is what it is.

    Quite a few of my former colleges from the time I worked at the prison, experienced these types of anxiety attacks when they were stressed out, sometimes at work too, I have seen it from time to time.

    Bad news is, there is no quick fix right here and now, good news is, it won´t kill you, and it can go away, if the stress diminish.

    Personally I have had other stress symptoms in periods as well, but we are all different, I did not get anxiety from it, so I can´t say I know how it is, I have only seen it.

    One of my close friends have had severe stress, he also had anxiety attacks from it, when it was worst almost each time he went to work.

    He went through some type of stress relief program, and came out ok, but he did have to stop working in the prison and found another job.

    He told me that stress is like pushing down a piston, if it takes you 6 month to push it down, it can also take 6 month to pull it up again.

    So there are no easy fixes, stress is something that one needs to take seriously, and find the right person that can help with dealing with it.

    I wish you both the best.

    • Posted

      Yes, probably anxiety attack but why does it only happen when I get woken up from my sleep rather than when I am awake.

      I feel I can control it as it was the first time it was so bad. Next time hopefully my logic side will kick in faster due to experience.

      Underlying issues of my wife's cataract and my eyes still exists, so sub consciously it is still on my mind and kind of out of my control. Which is probably what comes out when I am semi awake.

    • Posted

      I don´t know, but i believe you could be right, that it comes out when you let down your guards, in this case while you sleep.

      We men are often really good at depressing these things on a daily basis, because we want to look and feel strong, but it is like trying to hold a beach ball under water while you are swimming, at some point it will pop up to the surface.

      I am the worst example, I never did seek help when I was stressed, so I am the last person to tell others what to do, but I have seen even the toughest guys break, guys that you would think were untouchable, so it does happen to anyone, and how we deal with it is I guess is different from one person to another.

      Now you are into meditation and stuff, one of my friends that have had anxiety attacks, found himself a simple mantra, that he used each time it happened. This simple mantra shifted his focus, and could stop the anxiety, maybe it could be something to try out, I don´t know.

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