Menopause is making my anxiety worse...please help!

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First of all, let me express my gratitude to all of you who have shared everything here. And, I am so, so relieved to find this place to talk and share because I am just totally exhausted. 

SORRY, IT’S GOING TO BE A VERY LONG POST…but please be patient with me because I have never had a chance to share my troubles with anyone before. I am so thankful that there is actually a place where other women feel as I do. I thought I was going crazy.

I also have some NATURAL REMEDIES that might help some of you so read on……

I am 53 and I have been skipping my period since 2013. So, I am just sick and tired of battling my symptoms for almost 3 years now. As I write this, it's like 2 a.m. and of course, I can't sleep! I have been having jelly legs or just feeling weak in my arms right above the elbows and in my legs right above the knees. I have horrible anxiety plus mild panic attacks including foggy head and a little dizziness if I put my head down.

I have read a lot of posts and unlike some of you, I have not had any hormone tests or any other tests. Because I just can’t afford them. I have not been even diagnosed for menopause! I have been unable to work due to my conditions because of my horrible anxiety issues. My anxiety is so bad that I just can’t really be at a workplace for long periods of time. I try to do part-time work or work from home which is impossible to find. Even though, I have excellent education. So, if some of you have any suggestions about or where and how I can find some work from home, I would be indebted to you forever! I have a masters.

I have had anxiety issues since I was in my late 20s due to a few incidents. But, now it’s has like totally skyrocketed! I am confined to my home. Sometimes, I stay home for like 8 days and don’t leave! Because I am afraid that if I get one of my panic attacks (they are mild but very scary!) what am I going to do. I kept on thinking that I have some terrible disease and the worst part was that I couldn’t really explain HOW I felt to a doctor so how would it be treated? I couldn’t explain the head fogginess, just feeling crazy at times like I am really sick and going to die or something really stupid.

To add to this drama, I could not make myself go to the doctor because I was so panicky that if I go and what if they find something horrible! Now, that’s just awful. So, I went on living like this for about 4 years now!

Then, my anxiety got so bad that one day, I just went to get a check-up at a hospital where they have urgent care. So, all my blood tests came out normal but I had a UTI! The UTI was giving me horrible fast heartbeat and pulse including nausea! Because after I took the antibiotics, the fast heartbeat and pulse diminished and the nausea. However, the anxiety did not!

So, I got some courage and went to see a gyno. However, I don’t have medical insurance which makes everything worse because they give you those pro bono doctors who could care less about you! She was really rude and insensitive to me! She said you are not a teenager, you are an adult! Take care of yourself and don’t think about herbal remedies! Act like an adult and get on HRT!! And, if that doesn’t help you then you have bigger problems!! She hardly touched me and just prescribed HRT. Then she said, “See you in 3 months!” And, I was like what about my pap smear??!!

So, then I wanted to change the gyno but they only had ONE gyno! So, I got a pap smear and the nurse practitioner was much nicer, sweet and very empathetic to my concerns.

So, now I am just living day to day and trying to deal with my anxiety somehow. My friendships and relationships have suffered as well. My IRA has almost finished because I have been living off of it for a few years now.

I read here in one of the posts that one lady has been in perimenopause for about 9-10 years!!!! Omg…I don’t think I can handle that!

I CAN’T drive in traffic and I almost want to jump out of my car on a red light and just leave the car and walk away!! I take long inside routes and do not take the highway because I feel stuck if there is traffic. I do not go far away from home because I am scared of if I get really sick or get a panic attack and there would be no one to help me.

Generally, I don’t have a feeling of well-being and especially in my head. I can’t explain the exact feeling. I feel restless and nervous in my head. It’s worse if I don’t get enough sleep.   

Anyway, I used to take B-Complex regularly with women’s vitamins. But because what I have read here, I will go buy B-6 and 12 and hope to God that it helps my anxiety.

REMEDIES ***** please try Kava Kava for your anxiety but only the root not the stem kind. Linden flower leaves or tincture or tea is very good.

Also, you can mix turmeric in milk with some honey to drink which will soothe your joints and relieve some of the pains that you might have. You can buy turmeric from the indian grocery store. If you have diabetes, you can buy Fenugreek seeds from there and wash them like half teaspoon and then soak them in water overnight. Then, in the morning, strain the water and drink it on an empty stomach, this IS a surefire way to bring your blood sugar down. But, please continue with your meds and check your sugar so that you know how low or how high it is.

In India, they have been using turmeric, fenugreek seeds and so many other herbs for thousands of years and we just have come to know now about only a fraction of them.

For your anxiety, you can also try “alternate nose breathing” and believe me that works wonders! You can google it. MEDITATION and YOGA are definitely a PLUS. Join a class now!! Deep breathing always helps!

If there is ANYTHING for anxiety that you guys can suggest, please do. My main problem is that and I WANT my life back. I want to be normal and independent as I used to be.

Because right now, I feel like a cow who is tied with a rope around her neck to a pole!!

Thank you so much for listening!!  

Good luck to everyone…hang in there….we all are here to help each other and give support and I am wishing everyone the best and you guys are all in my prayers.

Love, Light and Blessings.





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  • Posted

    Hi, how are you? do hope you're feeling a bit better.  Anxiety is such a horrible thing, I've had & are still getting all sorts of peri symptoms(I'm 55, almost a year with no periods)anxiety, wooziness n wonky feelings, hot flushed & feeling really 'off' as though I'm really ill with something, I've had moments where I think I'm going to pass out & those weird body sensations AND yes I've been near housebound! many times finding it hard to make plans/organise things because I don't know how I'll be feeling...can be very debilitating 😡 my moods been quite fiery with floods of tears etc....seems as though it'll never end, as I've been reassured, I reassure does all stop & you start to feel better....just when?! Some days are better than others, I no longer take anything. In the meantime take each day as it comes, be kind to yourself. I have tried several supplements herbal etc, I no longer take B vitamins as they were aggravating my anxiety...this doesn't effect everyone...please ask your Dr about them & taking other supplements, has your Dr suggested any medication for anxiety?  I'm eating better with whole/organic foods were possible, less sugar, yoghurt, less red meat but have chicken & fish & more fruit n veges & for b vitamins I have malt extract every morning with porridge, nice n natural 😋 My distraction is writing, crosswords & craft things. For relaxation you could try chamomile tea, calming herbal tablets with valerian, yoga, massage, breathing exercises, walking, do you have a friend you could possibly join a support group with or maybe counselling might help. 

    Take care, sending you hugs xo  keep 'talking' to us here, I'm so glad I joined this group, the ladies are lovely. We're all doing it the same.


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    • Posted

      Hi there,

      Thank you so much for your kind words! I really appreciate it. More than words can express. This site has really helped me to calm down a little bit thinking that I am not going through something weird and there are other women as well.

      I really want to try taking the B vitamins but then I have also heard that they can exaggerate the anxiety which is the LAST thing I need right now. I already feel paralyzed and confined. 

      I swear I do the exact same thing. Make plans and then break them at the last moment because I have no idea how I WILL feel the next day! And, then my friends get mad at me or my sisters. 

      My doctor hasn't suggested anything! All she did was give me a prescription for HRT. Thats it. The nurse practitioner was sweet but she just suggested a diet with fruits, veggies and etc. 

      Nothing extraordinary. All these things I already know. They just behaved like suck it up because it's normal...a part of life. However, even though, it is but it's not like for a week or 2 weeks! Plus, it stops you from living your life and part of life is going to work That I can't do right now. 

      My anxiety is so bad that if I have a teaching assignment, I can only stay in the classroom for 3.5 hours at the most!! And, those 3.5 hours are full of mild terror for me and I am trying to hide my anxiety which makes everything worse. I can't sit still sometimes. 

      Anyway, thank you so much again. I have put in a call to the nurse practitioner to have a discussion as to what I can do for my anxiety. Let's see what happens. 

      And, I can't really afford a good doctor at the moment because of not working. Hopefully, when my anxiety calms down, I will be able to go back to work again and afford a decent doctor. 

      At the moment, the gyno doesn't even listen to me. So, I don't know who to talk to about any natural remedies or whatever. 

      She didn't even suggest the B-Vitamins.

      Every day is a struggle to tell you the truth. Sometimes, I think that if I were in a relationship; it would have given me the love and support that I really need right now. But then who knows...! 

      Sending you lots of love and hugs and all the ladies here! Hopefully, we will be able to make fun of all the weird symptoms!!One day! 


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    • Posted

      How are you doing? Do hope you're able to find a good Dr who can offer the help you need plus who has a good listening ear! is insurance always needed to access better health care in the U.S.? Reading your last sentence " make fun of all the weird symptoms...." I hang onto my warped sense of humour...which I have shared here LoL, as I say... I wake up every morning look in the mirror & laugh  LOL lol  

      Laughter is good even though it sometimes feels as though it's the end of the's to better days 😊 Take Care, keep well. 

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  • Posted

    Hi Misha.

    I...What can I say...I feel for you, very much so. Let me think a little bit.

    Where in the world are you? In the US? India? That makes a differece in what you can or not access... Let us know if you can, so that we suggest a bit more accurately. I also couln't quite understand if you are or not on any form of HRT. Are you?

    Take care. Teresa

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    • Posted

      Hi Teresa,

      Thank you so much for caring! I really appreciate it. No, I am in US - Eastcoast to be exact. And, I am not on any HRT because I wanted to take some time to think and see if I could figure out some natural remedies.

      Thanks so much again!

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    • Posted

      Hi Teresa, Sasha email wasn't working and I have no idea why so I created another one with misha.peace.

      Sorry for the confusion. I am in US.

      Oh, see how crazy I am getting already! Lol...I alread replied to you but I guess I forgot to tell you about my new email.

      Anyway, I was wondering what everyone is doing for pain. Sometimes, I get pain all over my body and it's really horrible. I sleep it off but it takes at least a whole day and I do take advil but it doesn't really help.

      I will post this in a new discussion to see if others can help too.

      Thanks again for all your help and care!

      I really am grateful


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