Menopause stating at 40 really? am I a freak?

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Hello - I'm looking for some reassurance regarding my symptoms because I can't quite believe I'm stating the menopause already (I'm 40)...the past 6 months I've been feeling pretty awful alot of the time - nauseous, shaky, mood swings, insomnia...then I started with night sweats, feeling cold when no one else was, and the awful incontinence whenever I sneezed & v.heavy periods. I was put on oestrogen gel and ultrgestan which solved the night sweats almost instantly - though not the other symptoms which still linger - is anyone out there going through this in their early 40's?? any advice?? I've got 2 little kids aged 2 & 4 and really wasn't expecting this now....rolleyes

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17 Replies

  • Posted

    I am pretty sure I started peri before 40 and still going through it at 46. Some of us are early, some of us are on time, and some of us are late. None of us are freaks. You've just got on the bus. Fasten your seat belt and enjoy the ride! wink

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  • Posted

    Hi Karen,

    It definitely sounds like you could be starting perimenopause. Is your Dr looking further into the incontinence when you sneeze?

    Everything else sounds normal for your age.

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  • Posted

    Hi Karen,

    If you are having heavy periods I would suggest getting on some iron if you aren't already. Ferrochel is good, and it's easy on the stomach. Could explain some of the symptoms like the cold intolerance, but it does sounds like you could be starting meno from the sound of others things. Seems like the doc thinks that too since they put you on hormones. Is all OK with your thyroid?

    Sue

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  • Posted

    hi Ladies - yes he did a blood test and checked my thyroid and I think it was all ok, I'm taking a multivitamin which has iron in it, though not sure how effective it is..is there any let up with this, does it come in waves or is this just how I'm going to feel for the next decade sad

     

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    • Posted

      Gosh Karen, wish I could give you an answer to that. We could all use a crystal ball. Hopefully the hrt will help you through the worse of it. I started on bios about 5 weeks ago, and am seeing a little bit of relief, but still shaky and sick feeling overall, I also got frozen shoulder on top of everything else. Thank GOD my kids are grown, I don't know how I would've done it with young children or a job. Although maybe distractions are a good thing. Ask your doc to check your ferritin levels (iron stores), if they are less than 50 you should be on an iron supplement more than what is in a multivitamin. I'm sure some of the other women can give you advice with other vitamins that help as well. How long have you been on the hrt?

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    • Posted

      I have a frozen shoulder /neck as well!  I didn't even think that was a symptom...I've been on HRT a few months, 2 pumps gel at first which didn't do much, then 3 pumps a few weeks ago which stopped the night sweats - thinking of going up to the max dose of 4 pumps, which my gyno thinks is ok - but it just sounds like a lot to me at this age, where do I go from there?? my blood showed I had ok oestrogen levels but I learnt that it is the fluctuation and balance between the hormones that causes the problem, and who knows if increasing the oestrogen will fix that??? guess it's just a lot of trial and error...

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    • Posted

      Yes, frozen shoulder is another lovely symptom, it can be from other things too, but for sure hormonal. I'm just getting in to the whole hrt thing and don't know much about it, I just knew that I didn't want to take synthetic hrt. But from what I've learned, most women start decreasing in progesterone first and this can be as early as in their 30s. And yes, it's hard to tell by blood work because hormones fluctuate all throughout your cycle. For me I had so may symptoms of estrogen dominance, but there are times that I feel my estrogen is too low, it's just so confusing. For example, I think frozen shoulder can be from lack of estrogen, but doesn't make sense because I'm estrogen dominant. However, my doctor said I may be estrogen dominant but that doesn't mean my estrogen is at the level where it should be, it's just that my progesterone is too low. 

      Also, it may just take more than a few months for us to start getting the hormones in to our systems as much as it should be. I'm just getting impatient! I don't have one day where I feel normal in the last year, it's just different degrees of feeling awful. 

       

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    • Posted

      oh Suzanne - I just want to hug you! it's so confusing to know what hornones are out of balance - whenever I google the symptoms of either one they seem to be the same!! I read recently that in this phase they are so erratic that they can change dramatically from day to day / week to week - so its probably safe to assume that there are times when both are high or low, hence getting symptoms of both - the gyno I see privaely is pretty sure low oestrogen is the main culprit- which I guess is why it's his recomendation to go on oestrogen, as seems to be common. I agree the bio-identical route is better which is why I go privately and get the gel - it's expensive but my health is priceless, and I make sacrifices. So agree with you about just wanting to feel 'normal' so hard to explain when you're just constantly 'off' though It really does make me appreciate the odd day when things appear to be in balance - I relish just being able to sit and feel calm, listen to music, play with my kids - things I used to just take for granted! so glad for the support on here, I now feel like this could be the eye of the storm and things will ebb and flow and eventually balance out x

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  • Posted

    The length differs for everyone. You haven't hit actual menopause yet. You are in peri. Once you've gone 12 whole months with no period at all then you are in menopause.

    I am pretty sure peri started for me around 43. I was still having monthly, though erratic periods when I had to have a hysterectomy. My heavy bleeding was endometriosis.

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    • Posted

      how will I know when I've gone 12 months if the HRT makes me have a period?? I've also had endo in the past - which was found when I had 2 large ovarian cysts removed, it was removed then - can it come back? starting to think maybe my oestrogen has always been low or unstable because apparently those are also symptoms of that...

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    • Posted

      Karen, perimeno simply describes the approx. 10 year period before we actually hit menopause, where our hormones are changing.  As we age, our systems become more erratic.  This is often expressed by changing period cycles, and feeling different in many aspects of our being.  It certainly isn't pleasant, and at times darn right scary.  

      I was 42 1/2 when peri started, with night sweats, foggy thinking, odd and strange sensations.  But I didn't hit menopause until I was 53.  

      Do everything you can to support your body right now.  You are not alone.    

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    • Posted

      thanks Gail Annie - so did your symptoms come and go during that time? I've had a prettty intense 6 months, basically feeling nauseous and anxious most mornings, exhausted in the evening though not sleeping, internal trembling etc etc - I've given up drinking, don't smoke, taking every oil, probiotic and vitamin under the sun, excercising and trying to eat healtly and now antidepressants and HRT - what more can I do?? I just need to know it may ease up - at least for a while...

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    • Posted

      Karen,  at least for me, I had a bad time for awhile (6 months to 1 year) then things calmed down and I did fine.  I did try HRT but it only seemed to make things worse actually.  But once I stopped that, while it took time to settle down, I got back to my own hormone production and I did well.  No more night sweats etc.  As the years passed, my periods were off (shorter, longer cycles, some clotting)  and then they spaced out further to once every couple months, until they finally stopped.  

      Just know that at this stage your body is doing some swinging with your hormones and yuor body is trying to adjust.  Doesn't make it easy, 

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    • Posted

      Gailannie - thankyou for taking the time to respond, it was what I was hoping to hear :-) my problem is I have no pateince - I just think that I have to be well for my kids and everyone and need to make myself well - but I guess I just need to be kinder to myself and realise that atm my body is out of balance and I just need to wait and take it easy until things calm down, I'm going to stick with the HRT and antid's as I don't think they've had time to settle yet - and I am better than I was a few weeks ago - though I do admire you for doing things naturally, have a lovely day xxx

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  • Posted

    Karen,

    Gailannie is very on point. I've listened to her advice and it has served me very well. I take long baths at night with candles and music. I drink tea. I go for walks. I make time, alone, for me. It's made me a better person.

    As for the endometriosis...yes, it comes back. I had a laparoscopy at 23 and had it removed. When I was 49 and had my hysterectomy a 2 hr surgery turned into almost 4 hours. The endo was all over the place, my uterus was almost 6 times its normal size, I had cysts in both ovaries and they ended up taking everything out.

    I knew I had felt bad for a long time but had no idea it was that bad. The Dr was amazed I was still functioning, going to work, etc

    Make sure you ask your Dr every and any question you have. Have them do tests.

    I'm looking to go to a menopause expert.

    You'll get wonderful support and advice on here😉

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    • Posted

      Hi Lottie - yes the advice on here is amazing - I don't have any sisters or friends who are going through this, so it is so reassuring to have this forum, I will definitley be on it a lot over the coming months / years!  Do you mind me asking why you had a hysterectomy, as the annoying thing with Endo is that they can never see it until they operate - did you get a lot of pain with yours? I ask as I have never really expereinced much pain, which I'm not complinaing about! but I rememebr the gyno who did my laparoscopy saying with all the endo I had I must have been in a lot of pain...but I wasn't, so I was really surprised when he said I had it - so it may be that I get hormonal symptoms rather than pain? Did you feel better after your hysterectomy, I heard a lot of women do - both emotinally and physically, yes I am going to make an appt with my gyno now and get all the questions out that I have, have a lovely day Lotti xxx

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    • Posted

      Lotti, I just had to write back and "thank you" for your kind words.  If I'm able to help another women that's wonderful.  None of this is easy and we all need all the help we can get.  

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