Mono (glandular fever), guilt, and desperation
Posted , 19 users are following.
I've had GF for nearly ten weeks and I've been off work the whole time. The past few days I've been unable to eat or bathe or even stand long enough to brush my teeth. My friends and colleagues are starting to question all the time off, saying helpful things like "I had mono for two whole weeks when I was 14 but my parents made me attend school anyhow", or asking if I could possibly make it to the office for half a day for an important meeting. I'm 34, (was) a recreational athlete, and I don't miss work lightly. There is no question in my mind that I'm unfit to work (or even drive to work!). I literally have insufficient energy to take a shower. I can't sit up for more than a few minutes due to spleen pain and nausea. Am I just being a pussy for staying mostly in bed this long? I have tried to go for short walks or to get a few groceries, but the muscle pain, nausea, and lightheadedness are miserable. The fever is long gone, but I'm still getting the sweats and shakes and intolerable body pains. I'm beginning to get very scared that something serious is wrong because I'm completely incapacitated by this illness and I'm not seeing any improvement. I'm desperate to feel better and to not be so dependent on my boyfriend for all the shopping, cooking, cleaning, etc. It feels like I'm losing my mind. Someone please tell me I'll wake up one day soon as my old self.
1 like, 352 replies
Stokieboy16 Sarah0350
Posted
craig07920 Stokieboy16
Posted
That's great to hear Stokieboy that you are improving even from a few weeks ago, a good sign but remember just take things slowly - gradually managing activity in a phased way is key during recovery!
Rhonda, your words are marvellous I really love reading them and bless you for all the words of kindness and encouragement you have offered to everyone on here - we love you
Craig
rhonda21886 craig07920
Posted
Rhonda
craig07920 rhonda21886
Posted
That's so kind of you Rhonda, I really appreciate that, your words are the same a blessing and I just remember how hard it was and how frightened and down I was when going through mono / glandular fever and want to reassure anyone else going through the same that they will pull through (with God's help!).
Craig
rhonda21886 Stokieboy16
Posted
Take care! Please keep us updated.
Prayers, Rhonda
Stokieboy16 craig07920
Posted
Thanks Craig and I am making sure don't overdo it - walk before you can run. By the end of my reduced hours working I am tiring!
craig07920 Stokieboy16
Posted
That's definitely sensible Stokie boy, sounds like you're doing all the right things and you will definitely recover quicker for that in my opinion. It must have been a horrible time for you and just want you to know I'm still rooting for you and still fully believe that recovery is happening right now and you will see the manifestations happening in your life and circumstances - lots of hope today!
Take care and hang in there - remember not to overdo!
Craig
Stokieboy16 craig07920
Posted
Bizarrely feel the cold more now with GF or it maybe just old age!
rhonda21886 Stokieboy16
Posted
Hi Stokie, sorry to hear about your relapse! Hopefully it will not last very long! It kust seems to be a part of the process of getting through recovery. We all try to think what we did that caused it. Cause we sure don't like the relapse and don't want oit to happen again if we can help it.
Today is 7 weeks I have been in relapse. I have made progress the last two weeks thank God!
Please keep us updated! Take good care of yourself! Know that we all care and understand how this virus is so tough to deal with. We know the symptoms are real but we know complete recovery will greet us with a smile and a big hug one day. Hopefully soon!
Prayers, Rhonda
craig07920 Stokieboy16
Posted
Definitely a good idea to avoid caffeine Stokie, but I get it that when you're under stress and feel the way you do that you sometimes will do anything for an energy boost - everything in moderation I guess.
No it's definitely not your age, colds and things can definitely hit you harder with glandular fever - still thinking about you today and want you to know I still do believe in a complete and full recovery for you, without any doubt at all, and even if it doesn't come right away don't want you to be discouraged because it will come!
Craig
Sarah0350
Posted
Hi guys. Sorry, I stopped getting notifications from this site. I'll have to check my email filters.
I moved to my boyfriend's place (again) since I'm not up to driving and maintaining groceries etc without help. It is the oddest bag I've ever packed: yoga pants, more yoga pants, old baggy t-shirts, painkillers, and a hoodie. It's like a sad vacation! :P
Since my last post, I've been a lump on his couch. Some days are better, I don't feel at risk of fainting in the shower the past few days. I've put on a couple of pounds because food takes no effort (on my part ?), now. I've been to the store (with my guy) a couple of times, but I don't last long on my feet. We bought four items yesterday and I was so grateful to get back in the car afterward. Not sure if this is viral fatigue or a reflection of a total loss of fitness and muscle mass. Good days seem to be followed by a day or two of total exhaustion. Nausea is much better this week.
After 11 weeks of mono, my former life with a job and an intense fitness routine is a hazy memory being gradually overwritten by naps and Netflix.
rhonda21886 Sarah0350
Posted
Good to hear of some progress!
Rhonda
craig07920 Sarah0350
Posted
Hi Sarah,
I really sympathise and so sorry to hear you've going through such a hard time with it. If it's any comfort at all let me reassure you that the phase you are going through now is by far the worse phase, that initial 3 or 4 months is the toughest of all, then the intensity of it usually eases although it can still take a bit of time to recover.
I often liken the virus in my own mind to the physical equivalent of a mental breakdown. It's like a physical breakdown of your body, where it is just not able to cope with even the simplest things anymore. But resilience gets built up again after time Sarah and you will get better and even though it might not feel like it now I definitely believe that given time you will recover and get back to a normal and active way of life. I really believe that because after 3 months I felt exactly the same as you, in despair and like there was not much hope or signs of improvement, but then eventually it came and it will all seem like a distant memory once it's over with.
Thinking of you and just get plenty of rest just now and take things one day at a time. Hope things start to improve soon.
Craig
jesse27406 Sarah0350
Posted
Hey Sarah,
That sounds hard, I'm sorry you're going through this. I'm in week 7 struggling alongside you. I can definitely relate to the dependency and missing my old life. I'm glad your BF is there to help
One thing I've found to be helpful is 3g of liposomal Vitamin C taken with meals.
Hope today is good one
Sarah0350
Posted
craig07920 Sarah0350
Posted
Hi Sarah,
So sorry that you've been feeling so rubbish, it's such an awful virus I know. When I went through it, it was one of the hardest times of my life, like you after three months I felt terrible and didn't know what was happening or how or when I would get better.
But Sarah I did thanks to the grace of God, there is hope still and there is recovery, it's just so frustrating it takes time, these are definitely the worst three months, it can still take time to recover after that and you may not feel yourself for a while yet but there will come a time when you feel much more like yourself and a time when you feel back to full health again - it definitely does come despite all the worries and anxiety that it won't, just want to reassure you of that today, I went through the same and remember just the terrible feelings physically, mentally and emotionally, but I still fully believe you WILL get better Sarah without any doubt in my mind, just do your best to cope with each day at the moment I know it's easier said than done but there is light at the end of the tunnel given time.
Thinking of you and hang in there
Craig