Morphine addiction!?

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So, since 2014 I've been in and out of hospital with various abdominal and gynaecological problems. The pain will get so severe that all they can really give me is morphine.

Also, since I am allergic to ibuprofen, aspirin, codeine and Tramadol, there is really no other strong pain relief they can give.

So, every time I've gone to a&e (which is alot), they give me morphine.

Recently I've had this severe abdominal pain that the hospital can't seem to find the cause of. The pain gets so bad that I pass out and my body just can't handle it. So, the ambulance paramedics and a&e doctors give me morphine.

However, I've realised that now that I crave the morphine. At first I only wanted the morphine for when the pain flares up and gets really severe. But now, I want it even when I'm not in severe pain. I want it all the time to help relieve even the smallest sharp pain. I crave that feeling I get when it's injected; the lightheadedness, the 'high'.

How do I deal with this and stop myself from feeling this way?

I don't know what to do. I need help!

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  • Posted

    Yes, the well meaning doctors have gotten you addicted to morphine. Please don't look at this as some sort of moral failure on your part. You were just a patient/participant in all this and the doctors were doing what they were trained to do-- treat pain, but together you got addicted to opiates. It is VERY common. Heck, some people get addicted with just the prescription they get from a dentist for pain from getting a tooth pulled. It is no surprise at all that you have gotten addicted after years of morphine administration. The big thing is to realize this for yourself and do NOT go broadcasting this to any of the emergency room docs or the other docs you would see for your abdominal pains because once they hear you are an addict they will give you NOTHING at all. You will then suffer BIG time! So, seek help for the addiction by yourself and keep it secret. It is no one's business but your own. Are you just having psychological cravings and no physical symptoms? If that's the case, you may just need some support that you could easily get from attending a narcotics anonymous meeting. It might help to hear how easily other people got addicted to opiates and how they have been handling it. You also need to critically look at your pains and figure out if this is "real" or your brain thinking it is real. It is really hard for an addict to do that alone. There are plenty of psychologists and social workers out there that will work with you to help you through this. You go on the Psychology Today website looking for therapists, type in your insurance, type in that you are looking for help with substance abuse or addiction and your zip code, it will spit out a list of therapists in your area that will take your insurance. You will have a private practice therapist on your side to help you with this difficult issue. Good luck. I too am a chronic pain patient who let her docs get her addicted to big time pain meds- Dilaudid in my case. I now live on buprenorphine patches for my pain and am so much happier and I function too!

    Lynda

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    • Posted

      Recently I've been having abdominal pains that flare up severely, to the point that I pass out. The doctors just give me morphine and sent me home. I've been to the emergency room 3 times already and each time, its the same thing. They don't want to do any tests or listen to me. They just inject me with morphine and that's it. They don't want to find the cause of the pain. How many more times do I have to go to the emergency room, for them to realise that there is something wrong.

      But, even when I'm not in pain I still want the morphine. After years of being administered it, I'm used to it and love the effects of it. I've known for about 6 months that I have a problem, but I haven't really told anyone, especially the doctors because you're right, they'll just end up not giving me anything. I've been looking into some psychological help with it and hopefully it goes well.

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