Posted , 5 users are following.
hi guy's
my Mum passed away on the 9th of September
she was. 78 and had been in hospital with something totally unrelated for 8weeks.
I have been on berevment leave for 2weeks now and the funeral is next Tuesday.
my partner has said I have been really strong,and I have not really grieved properly yet.
i know it will hit me on the day.
any tips on how to get through the day would be greatly appreciated xxx
0 likes, 9 replies
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LFCste peter1511
Posted
Psyched_Out_Kim peter1511
Posted
So sorry for your loss.
I lost my mom last year, and it's been a rough road. She was quite young yet, so that adds to things. The best I can say is to go with the flow. Some day it will hit you, so ride it out, and don't hide any feelings. Since the funeral hasn't happened yet, there's a good chance that reality hasn't sunk in yet. It's quite common for people to be somewhat numb to the situation, but once at the funeral reality sets in. When all is said and done, and you're not surrounded by people, the emotions will come bubbling up. Of course this all depends on the relationship you had with your mom.
Anyhow, it's important to remember that everyone grieves differently, and at their own pace. There's no rules or time limits. It all happens in due time.
LFCste Psyched_Out_Kim
Posted
borderriever peter1511
Posted
It can take upwards of two years to get over a family loss. One of the main things I would advise is that you try and discuss your loss with family members as they will be feeling the same way as you.
I live in the North East and like the Scots we have a wake after the funeral where you will be able to talk out your loss. and remember all the bitter, sweet memories of your loved on. After the wake you will feel the loss and will do so for some time, sorting out your Mothers state and house can also be a real problem and that on its own can be very stressful.
Sometimes you will need to talk out your problms and hopefully as well your Partner will be able to listen and help you through this difficult time
Keep a hold, Sorry for your loss
BOB
LFCste borderriever
Posted
apologies but I'm not sure where your time limit comes from as far as I I'm concerned you Never get over a loved one passing you can learn to accept it and move on there is a difference that said you're upwards of two years to get over is simply incorrect and baffling
borderriever LFCste
Posted
Many people will start to begin to sort themselves out in twelve months and be able to consider what they want to do after their loss. We all need to function at these times as we can loose people who were real saul mates where they did everything together. Two years can be taken as an average period when someone does move on. We do need to move on whatever the relationship was
BOB
LFCste borderriever
Posted
I do tend to do that at times
anxietysite123 peter1511
Posted
Sorry for your loss. I dont really think anyone can give specific tips as everyone grieves differently. However, it really does help to just put yourself in a room once that day comes and just allow yourself to cry, reminisce, whatever you feel comfortable with. If you want to cry an entire month, then you need to do it. If you don't feel the need to cry ever, that's okay too. But don't hold back from seeing her one last time at the funeral. Don't feel embarrassed if you say a few last words to her.
I lost my best friend of 23 years to suicide in 2013. I couldn't make it to the funeral. I still grieve to this day, and that's alright. It took me a good two weeks of ugly crying and not eating to finally get out of bed.
I hope you get through this day as quickly as possible. Just know She is still with you, just in a different form now.. It also helps me to sometimes sit in my room when nobody is home and talk to his picture. Oh and make sure when you have a dream about her, it is considered a visit from her.. There is nothing better for me than when I have a dream about my friend and know he is with me. Best wishes.
peter1511 anxietysite123
Posted