My 99 year old grandma on her death bed?

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My 99 year old grandma has been relatively healthy and disease free her whole life but just due to natural old age, she has been bed ridden for the last 15 years.  Her mind is very sharp and clear but her body is just unable to keep up.  

She will often have a couple times a year her ups and downs where it seems like she might be going but always got better again.  This time though, it seems like it could be it.  She hasn't been able to eat for the past week and she's only been able to take very small sips of water fed to her by spoon.  She says she doesn't want anything to eat because it upsets her stomach (stomach pain) and it pains a lot to swallow...something about her mouth or tongue is going.  She's unable to speak now but she can fully understand and hear what we say to her. 

If she is only going to sip small spoons of water a day and nothing else, even a young and healthy human would eventually die due to lack of nutrition/energy.  She's been hanging on for the last 7-9 days like this and I kept asking family couldn't we just give her some nutrients intravenously?  Isn't there a way to feed her nutrients either by injection or through liquid that has more nutrition than just water?

They said something about her her vein is too small doctors would not be able to find it and inject anything.   Is this true? Is there really no way to feed her some nutrients to give her body a chance to recover or get better?  She seems like she is only dying because she simply isn't eating anything.  Any advice would be helpful!

 

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  • Posted

    Hi so sorry to hear that your grandma is not eating or drinking. My opinion is your grandma is slowly passing away. It happened to my mum last December. I watched how she stopped eating and finally couldn't drink. I think it's the natural order of dying when the body can no longer keep going. It is an awful thing to witness but prolonging a life by intravenous feeding seems cruel. Quality of life is important and if life is a struggle it is emotionally and physically tiring for that person. I didnt want my mum to pass but my sisters and I were with her holding her hands knowing that her struggle with her body's limits was over. She was at peace and her love is living in each of her very large family. She is badly missed but it is part of life's cycle. Take comfort from knowing she had love around her and be with her as much as you can. Talk to her tell her how much she is loved. When my mum was about 36 she had a near death experience and said she went towards the light and said she couldn't leave her 7 children and felt herself come back. She had an Infection from an operation in hospital. The next day a cleaner came and spoke to her and asked if the lady in that bed yesterday had died. It was my mum she looked so much better that day that she looked a different person. After that she said she was not afraid to die. My mum really suffered the last 2 years of her life it was awful for our family. When we were holding her hand her breathing changed I said to her go to the light mum and she passed away peacefully with no more suffering. Take care and get support from your family. I hope this helps in some way.

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    • Posted

      Thanks Debbie.  That was a wonderful response and I fully agree with you.

      Yes, it seems she's unable to swallow or it is painful.  She still wants and accepts water but nothing else. She doesn't like any other kinds of fluids for some reason (either she can taste the sweetness or flavors or it upsets her stomach) but she will shake her head if it's anything else but water.  Yes, she's been surrounded by her large family for days now but she's definitely on her way and I think comforting her and speaking to her is the best thing we can do.  Her mind is still so sharp and she fully understands everything.  She's just unable to speak and unable to eat and move.  Thanks so much for the reply.  God bless.

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  • Posted

    Bless you. My mum couldn't swallow her last few days. If your grandma can't swallow nurses should supply you with small sponge you can soak with water to put on her lips. Keep your happy memories and just love her. She will always be in your heart. X

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  • Posted

    Indeed, it appears she cannot swallow or it is difficult. Despite everything she needs and acknowledges water however nothing else. She doesn't care for some other sorts of liquids for reasons unknown (possibly she can taste the sweetness or flavors or it irritates her stomach) however she will shake her head if it's whatever else yet water. Indeed, she's been encompassed by her expansive family throughout recent days however she's certainly on her way and I think ameliorating her and addressing her is the best thing we can do. Her psyche is still so sharp and she completely comprehends everything. She's only unfit to talk and unfit to eat and move. Much obliged such a great amount for the answer.God bless.

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  • Posted

    If you are in a place where there is a senior care agency, contact them immediately. Caregivers are amazing and specialize in making your loved one feel comfortable as they transition.

     

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