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My anxiety is worse than ever.

Posted , 4 users are following.

BellaLuna
BellaLuna

Hi I am new here and at the end of my tether sad

I have had anxiety for 17 years, I am agoraphobic andcan only go out with my husband and I have OCD and some other issues, it's all a bit of a long story but I will say that usually despite being unwell I manage relatively happily on a day to day basis.

Just over 3 weeks ago that changed very suddenly, I was out and had a huge and unexpected amount of anxiety, nothing would stop it, I did the breathing and distraction techniques but it wouldn't stop.

Normally if this happens I am back to 'normal' again in a few days but not this time.

Every single day for over 3 weeks I have been in a constant anxiety state, it's the worst I have ever suffered in years, day and night, indoors and out I am having every anxiety symptom you could think of.

One gp offered beta blockers but I can't face the prospect of them, I have been on Diazepam for 17 years and the last thing I want is another pill to worry about because you can't stop beta blockers suddenly and they wont stop the fear and nightmares anyway.

To be honest I feel like I am in withdrawal from the Diazepam, years ago they did stop it suddenly and it was just like this except this time I am still taking it.

I have not increased the dose in 10 years and I don't want to either because every time I did that in the past the relief was short lived and I couldn't reduce the dose even after a couple of days without feeling really ill.

I have no idea what caused this, one day I was my usual ill but coping self and the next it was out of control.

I have a CPN and two months ago before it even got to this she said she would refer me for psychotherapy, I spoke to her yesterday and she hasn't even done it yet but says she is going to.

In the meantime I am shaking, sweating, hyperventilating, having chest pains and rapid heartbeat, waking with anxiety, visiting the toilet 5 times a day and many other symptoms, I freak out when I go in a shop and I'm lucky if I can even stay there, this is a very familiar shop too that usually I feel safe in with my husband but now I can hardly cope with it.

To add to the worry I have flashes of light across my eyes, hundreds a day and my optician can find no cause so  is referring me for more tests.

I'm just stuck, my meds are doing nothing, my coping techniques are not working and I can't pinpoint a cause for this.

I have been doing some reading and one technique suggests that when you get the symptoms you should invite them in and not fight them, I tried at home and it worked a few times but I don't think I am strong enough to try it outdoors where I feel more vulnerable quite yet.

I'm really not sure where to turn anymore, I am sat here terrified to sleep because I feel anxious, I don't want nightmares, I don't want morning to come because I wake up anxious and I'm scared of going out tomorrow so I have this aawful fear and dread and to top it all I am scared I will wake up blind because of these eye flashes.

I'm so scared and I can't reduce it like I have in the past, I don't really know why I am posting, I know there is nothing anyone can do but I think I just need to let it out, it's so horrible and right on top of Christmas too when I just wanted to enjoy it with the children sad

0 likes, 10 replies

10 Replies

  • jay3287
    jay3287 BellaLuna

    Posted

    Hey don't feel bad your not alone. I am 27 yrs old.. I have a birthday coming up in the 15th and I am jus like blah!! It's jus another day.. I have been dealing with anxiety for 7 yrs off and on. But since July It has been very very very bad.

    I have had sleepless nights, shaking, body trembling, headaches, constipation, loss of appetite, loosing weight, stomach pains, chest pains, tingling and numbness in face hands and feet, vein pain in my hands, back pain. Any symptom u can think of I have had and it's a very terrible feeling.

    I just feel ill everyday like I am dying from an deadly disease. Some days I can't even get out of bed.. So don't feel alone because you're not. But I know this too shall pass and keep faith and believe in God everything is going to be alright. I am also here if you ever need anyone to talk to.. It gives me some type of relief to know I'm not out here alone...

    • enchantresskash
      enchantresskash jay3287

      Posted

      glad your here  ur young i am  a crone    so goes in all ages    no we ccan vanquish this demon  moreless   on facebook if  anybody wants to add me
    • jay3287
      jay3287 enchantresskash

      Posted

      It's so hard. I feel like crap everyday.. I can barely stand up and do the dishes without feeling dizzy or heart racing
    • enchantresskash
      enchantresskash jay3287

      Posted

      same here  , worries a person you  have heart problems makes it worser i work 7 days too with all of this going on
    • jay3287
      jay3287 enchantresskash

      Posted

      I'm to the point where I stop working because i don't have the strength to move sometimes. It's very horrible. I only feel ok when I am laying in bed.
    • BellaLuna
      BellaLuna jay3287

      Posted

      Thank you so much, it truly helps a lot to know you are not alone with it, I'm sorry you suffer too, it's such a horrible thing to live with.
  • enchantresskash
    enchantresskash BellaLuna

    Posted

    how old   are you,  i am  60  i  got infection   badly about 3 weeks ago and have felt petty much as you,   did herbs only up until now, antibodtics messed me  up, everything makes me panicky,  waking up early heartrate up  feel cant beathe,,,, having to take xanaxes plus smoking too much,but  feel can conquer it soon, understand  you so sorry
    • BellaLuna
      BellaLuna enchantresskash

      Posted

      Hi I am 38, thank you, it's so horrid, I am smoking far too much as well at the moment but you can't help it when it gets this bad can you, obviously it's not ideal but you do what you need to to cope, Ihope you feel better soon.
  • shameem74
    shameem74 BellaLuna

    Posted

    Propanalol works for my palps as my first weeks with this anxiety is due was the worst time I have ever experienced .propanalol is a beta blocker and has very mild side effects. basically takes a couple of days to kick in.
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