My battle

Posted , 3 users are following.

Goodmorning to everyone .I am from Greece and sorry for my English.I will try to make it clear for all but sorry for some mistakes .I suffer from OCD since I was 8 years old.I used to remember things with words and I had a lot of anxiety if one word was forgotten .Then during my teen years I was fearing that I would lose control and make something bad to my self .At the age of 22 I had a serious psychotic depression episode .I was feeling as a bad or paranoid person because i had scrupulous sexual thoughts about God .I was sure that no one in the earth could have these thoughts and also I believed I was the reason of every bad thing that happened in the earth .I didn't sleep for two weeks .I found my mind again when I took a medicine that made me sleep again.I have a big fear of coincidences and of numbers like 66 or 666 .When I predict the numbers of the cars I think it is message that I am going to die.But the most serious problem that I have is that the last 6 years I feel that I am having a premonition of my death and I think that every day I will die in my sleep.I fear that I will predict my death .I see that nothing happens but I cant be calm .Also when something good is going to happen i think that this day will be my last .During university years I had a lot of difficulties and I believed that I wouldn't graduate .I told my self that if the day of my graduation ceremony will come this would be my last day in life .My graduation ceremony is tomorrow and now I am scared .I know that I have ocd but I fear that OCD gave me the ability to sense or predict my death and that there's no future for me after graduating from university.Thanks for your time and please help me .I dont want to die and I wa t to be a normal person who doesn't know when he is going to die

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6 Replies

  • Posted

    Are you seeing any one for your OCD.,and do you take any medications for your condition I would advise you to talk to your GP
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    • Posted

      I have a doctor and he told me that I can not predict my death and that everything bad in my mind happens because of OCD .I take medicines every day and I have some moments when I feel better but now because of tomorrow's graduatiion ceremony I feel confused and melancholic.i fear that this is a premonition

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  • Posted

    Please go and talk to your doctor so you can remain safe.

    I know you worry about numbers and God and patterns but please believe me, there is NOTHING supernatural in the universe. Everything is natural. There are no patterns, no God. Be free. Our parents and ancestors gave us these beliefs. They are not true. I only believe in natural events and I feel free and good about life. Try it. Forget all your patterns and enjoy life. Nothing bad will happen!

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    • Posted

      Thanks .let me tell you that I believe there is God .It is very logical that a superior power made the human .I will speak to my doctor and I will try to live free as you tell me .Thank you for your help
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    • Posted

      If you believe in God, then I won't stop you. Be aware that often religion causes mental health problems because you think that God controls and even the devil exists. There is no God. When I discovered this, I was free... really free to love life and not be scared. Good luck. please talk to your doctor.

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