My boyfriend broke up with me because he has PTSD

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Some days ago, my boyfriend told me that we should go our separate ways and I asked why, he said he has PTSD and I am the cause of it.. I really didn't see myself as the cause of it even tho I really do not know what PTSD meant at the time. I told him I wasn't the cause because I am just not a toxic person. Only for him to confirm to me that he has been having PTSD since february and he kept it away from me.

Since the month of march, my boyfriend had been acting up, he became easily irritated and things that made him happy no longer made him happy. I started to question him and asked him lots of questions which made me look like a nag. I bought lots of books to read so I can help myself not think about the things he did but I couldn't help just ignoring him. Now some days ago I learnt about his PTSD and I then knew it had been the cause of his actions..

He told me he has to break up with me because he is less of himself, sincerely I don't believe that. I love him so very much that I am willing to go through this phase with him no matter what it was going to cost us as long as he is fine. I know I wasn't the cause of the PTSD but I don't mind that he blamed me.

The day I went over to talk to him about the break up, he kept on crying.. I was sad because I felt like if I was that toxic and really the cause of the PTSD, he should be happy leaving me. He said he might never be interested in any relationship but told me to keep the stuffs he have together.

Now I don't know if I should give him space or take the break up.. I know him very well that he can't even handle a break up in his condition now.. If I should give him space, how long should it be?? A space of one month or??? He loves me very much but he just feels if he stays we might get to argue or have misunderstandings or I might get to start seeing him as somebody with a stigma but the truth is that knowing he has PTSD, I will always read up about it, see a therapist too for myself...

what should I do??? And yes, he is seeing a therapist already.. He is just pushing me away

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1 Reply

  • Posted

    hi omah, we know 1st hand what PTSD is like. i have it. it's terrible to live with and worse when you live with a partner. it's terrible if you're blamed for it though. like you had with you partner i told my partner to go, but i was very ill at the time. PTSD needs a huge effort to make a small insignificant part of your life. as you're the nearest to your partner they will lash out at you. you may need to speak to someone for yourself. i find certain things terribly hard due to assault/grooming. i have lasting effects from this. it's beyond a joke. i hate feeling a victim. i was glad to read that your partner is getting support. sometimes PTSD is so hard to live with you push EVERYONE away. tough to live with, tough to support sufferers with. bless you, try your best and NO you're right, you have not caused PTSD but he's looking for someone to blame.

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