My cerebral vein thrombosis experience !

Hi All , 

I am a male GP from Iran , 31 Y/O. Last year februrary exactly on my Birthday night we had a binge drinking and a severe dehydration, two days after very accidentally in a party I took 2-3 puffs of Marijuana(Hash) . The day after I started to have a headache actually the early days it wasn't so hard and step by step it exacerbated on my right eye , temple and occipital parts. I got examined by Opth. and then referred to Neurologist. First diagnosed for Methanol intoxic. and treated by prednisolone and then after MRI diagnosis was changed to CVT which started to be treated by Enoxaparin and Warfarin. The most terrible part was searching on net , reading every article relating to the condition and panic attacks. I have never experienced such feelings , depersonalization regarding high stress level killed me actually ! In all investigation I found Factor V leiden and a FANA ( low positive level Antibody for Lopus - I had no other signs and symptoms of Lopus or anythingelse)

I am on Warfarn since last year and I am going to recheck all my hypercoagulable lab Tests. I got married a few month ago , stress on stress !! LOL 

the problem I am facing right now is thinking a lot about the life after death , feeling stressful driving in road at nights like I am losing control and consciousness. My neck gets stiff and I gaze to the road , so I prefer not to drive. Although these feelings were much worse in lasts month. And above all have the feeling that something is WRONG with me. It may be a result of some obsessive thinking or may be a organic cause. 

I have completely stopped drinking alcohol or any drugs , only 1-3 cigarettes a day , which I feel sinful for this , although I have a very bad feeling I don't know why I smoke these 2-3 cigarettes !! I am grateful for living here , because as I was reading posts from Europe and US , the patients have to many diffculties being visitied by especialist , but in Tehran everything is really cheap and available , although being a physician really helped me on one side and made me obsessed on the other side.

I took TA courses ( Transactional Analysis) which really helped ! I play music most of the times and now having a very slight job as Aesthetic physician .

I want to get free from obsessive thoughts. I know What come may will happen for anyone no matter who. There is no reason for having a Thatanophobia (death phobia) and I know have done the bests in this condition. I want my fully self confidence back , I don't want to feel myself as an stranger or seeing the world through a camera or mirror.

I really appreciate your feedbacks

I do believe that modernity , IT , technology ... has stolen lots of peace from human kind but let's take the benefits and share our experiences in order to help each other.

regards

Shaahin

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