My girlfriend can't have sex. I need some advice.

Let me give you an example, lets just say that you were a soldier who due to an injury sustained in war could not engage in sex. Would you say that would be the end of any relationship that you had? Of course not.

The problem is that all male animals, including humans are all pre-programmed to reproduce. It is just something that is built into us all, but if for one reason or another procreation is not possible, does that mean that the male has to spend the rest of his life alone? Of course not.

In time it may well be that a cure might be found for your partner, but until then you have one of two options, you either leave her because the sex is more important to you than she is, or you stay with her and support her through this very difficult time.

If you wish to discuss it with her you have to be very careful and gentle that you don't make her feel uncomfortable, and thereby make her psycholical condition even worse.

You must always remember that she is not just a piece of meat, she is a sensitive, intelligent, living, breathing, feeling human being.

Although she doesn't say much to you about this, I have no doubt that she feels very guilty that she has no way at the moment of satisfying you.

So as I say, a great deal depends upon how much you love her.

In my case I would willingly give my life for my partner and ask nothing in return - but everybody is different. 

I think she is suffering from vaginismus and there is a cure .

I agree a lot w what Archemedes says, but w that said, I know Archemedes is an older gentleman ans therefore a lot wiser and not thinking w the wrong head. I suspect benst is rather young and well,.... that's all they think about.

The part I do not agree w and my being a female myself feel is selfish, is the unwillingness to sexually please him other ways and I don't think it is too much to expect or ask for. Although as annoying as it is to accept, I have learned to accept that men are very different from women. Looks is the number one most important thing, until a certain age,.. And even then it doesn't change for some. Men are so visual, as shallow as that is, I can't change that. Men seem to bond and that's scientific evidence to back that; w their partners through sexual activity. I completely understand what he's saying and if someone wasn't at least trying to make it up to me in other ways, it would just feel like my best guy friend w no sexual chemistry and I couldn't see that lasting. Resentment builds up and this is how people end up cheating. I haven't, wouldn't and couldn't, but I'm playing devils advocate and have friends who were in your position.

I think you two should go to couples counseling, because this issue has so many dimensions to it and I feel that you both can get the most out of it from seeing maybe a sex therapist and/or regular couples therapist together. Good luck!