My husband died.

Hi Michele

Firstly I'm very sorry to hear about the loss of your husband. I haven't experienced a loss like this so I cannot even start to imagine how you feel, but I expect what you are feeling is perfectly normal. You've lost somebody that you loved deeply. 

People will tell you that time is a healer, and in time you will learn to cope and focus on happy memories.

Have you joined any local support groups? Or been to your doctor for counselling? I really think something like that could help.....not to forget but just how to carry on and eventually find some happiness within these dark times 

Aww, I'm so sorry for your loss...grief is very much a personal, individualistic thing....no two people grieve the same way....I always remember when my sons granny died...it took a whole year before it hit him, and it just came out one night, so sudden and unexpected....it's quite normal, and healthy to feel all the emotions you are experiencing, from sadness through to anger. If you want to cry, then cry..if you want to scream, then scream your head off .....in some cases people become enraged!...my mums brother was Downs, and when he passed away my mum, a devote Roman Catholic turned her back on the church for many years, she was so angry that he'd been taken from her no one can tell you how long your feelings will last, they will last as long as they last.....I do hope you find some inner peace, and in time those feelings of loss, anger, sadness will be replaced by fond memories....give it time Michele, you're still in the very early, Raw stages, much love to you xxxx 

As time goes on people dont monitor or check what they say to a grieving person .that can make It seen worse but their sympathy is the same

Hi Michele,

So very sorry you lost your husband. I lost mine unexpectantly without warning 4 years ago.

It is very different for everyone. But I remember that I seemed worse as a few months passed. I believe I was in shock in the beginning...and really truly did not understand that I would not see him.

As the reality that death is forever began to hit...and that I was beginning to understand that my life would never be the same, I was all over the place with emotions. I thought I was absolutely crazy.

I had one person tell me something that I hung onto and i would like to share it with you. She said, "you are not crazy, no matter what you are doing or how you are reacting. You are not crazy...this is grief".

For some reason...I needed to hear that i had not gone "crazy" even though my emotions were so out of control.

I don't know if you will ever need to hear that...but just in case you do or will at some point.

I have no answers...but understand that absolute shock of trying to find the world that was just shattered and blown away.

So very sorry you are going through this.