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my mom died 2 days ago of a ruptured aortic aneurysm

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My mom had been complaining of back pain for the past few months and was taking Robackaset to fix the pain and it seemed to work ,she called it the miracle pill. Unfortunately and of me telling her to go get it checked out ,she did not and now has passed away and will be missed dearly and she was such a beautiful lady . She just turned 72 in Oct. Within 40 mins, she passed away and we found out today from the coroner that she passed away from a ruptured aortic aneurysm and he said that she went very fast and did not feel any pain and even if she was at hospital there was nothing that could have been done. I will miss her dearly and it is so painful because it is so unexcepted and so sudden. I regret not pushing her more to go get her back checked out because they might have found the aneurysm and been able to fix it. I have just looked for the first time since I found out earlier exactly what it meant that she passed away from and the coroner said she would not have felt anything ,it would have just been like falling asleep and that has made me feel abit better because she was alone and I hate the thought that she died alone. I just wish she would have gotten her back checked out and then they would have found this and maybe saved her life and fixed it. She seemed to also ,for the past months have a hard time going shopping and being on her feet for to long , she would sort of burn out faster than normal and she was seeing her doctor because she was diagnosed with borderline diabetes and had 2 mnths to lose abit of weight and change her eatting habits, she did everyting she was suppose to and the doctor never picked up on this and this is something I do not understand because she had so many different bloodwork done for this and other things and is it possible that this was overlooked because I was also told that she had alot of plaque and her cholestoral and was on medication for that. I don't understand why this was not found at all. With the high cholestoral why wouldn't a chest exray been done to make sure her heart was ok and also her aorta? If anyone has any kind of answer to my questions it would be much appreciated and comforting to know , anything about this and why it was not found. I loved her dearly ,she was my best friend ,my confidant and I will miss her so much, my life has changed drastically over this and I will never be the same person I was 3 days ago. I love you so much mom and miss you even more, R.I.P. Corey[/b]

6 likes, 37 replies

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  • diane35061
    diane35061 Guest

    Posted

    I have only just come across your post and hope that you are healing.  I wanted to answer you as my Mum has just passed away this Tuesday, 10th March, 2015 with the same condition as your Mum.  You have answered some of my questions.  My Mum had had an aneurysm for several years which was being monitored and she was told that one day it would be operated on.  When the aneurysm needed an operation, she was told that the risk was too great due to her age and other health problems.  To be honest, being told about it will have caused her anxiety as she was told that one day it would burst.  I could never speak to her about this and I am now beating myself up about it.  At the same time, she had problems walking and was told by the GP that this was due to a bad back but I have a bad back and  she did not seem as disabled as I am or have the same symptoms.  From reading your article, I believe that my Mums back pain could have easily been the aneurysm.  Your Mum was unaware of the aneurysm and I actually think that this was a blessing.  My Mum could well have been worried about hers bursting all the time but I could never speak to her about it.  I believe that it is a very difficult operation even for the healthiest of people and can leave people chair/bed bound.   I thank you for answering some questions that I had with regard to my Mums back pain and hope that I have helped you to maybe feel that your Mum not knowing about the aneurysm was maybe a good thing.  Take care. Diane
  • lorraine1950
    lorraine1950 Guest

    Posted

    my husband was just told he has an aoritic aneurysm. it's 3.9mm. we were told the doctor won't do anything until it reaches 5mm. this is scary to us both, cause we are doomed if it gets bigger,& doomed if he needs an operation. he's only 65 years old. now i'm scared to death.
    • diane35061
      diane35061 lorraine1950

      Posted

      Hi Lorraine,

      Is there a reason for you feeling doomed if it gets bigger and needs an operation?  My Mum had the aneurysm for several years.  It grew bigger and was ready for an operation but she had several other health issues so the risk was too great for her. If she had been ok with her other health issues, she would have gone ahead with it.  

    • j4967
      j4967 lorraine1950

      Posted

      Hi. My dad had an aortic anuerysm 4.5 in October. Doctors have been watching it for five years, waiting for it to get to 5. It got to 5.3 in April. He had a cath on April 13 and had an appoitnment scheduled the following week to see if he could get stent or have surgery. They found out he had a blocked kidney, so they were trying to figure out what he could even do. His anuerysm ruptured Friday night, the 18th. When we got to the hospital, he was alive, barely. They took him to a different hospital. Surgeon said he was brain dead, he thought, but he still had a pulse. We went ahead with the surgery anyway. I could tell the doctor didn't want to because he knew the outcome. After surgery, doctor said he wouldn't wake up. Lost kidney, lung, liver function. Had tons of blood and platelet bags. My opinion: push this. We waited on the doctors and insurance, and this is what we got. He was only 66 and in great shape other than this time bomb inside him.
    • chelly37321
      chelly37321 lorraine1950

      Posted

      Hi Lorraine,

      Cheer up, I am only 36 years old and I was diagnosed last March with ascending and descending aortic aneurysm. I am scheduled for an open heart surgery within this month.

      My father died last 2005 due to aortic aneurysm,it was very late when we found out that we have aneurysm.

      I am very hopeful that I will leave a normal and active life again after my surgery.

    • donna15228
      donna15228 chelly37321

      Posted

      Chelly37321. My husband was diagnosed with a AAA ten years ago at an early age as a default from an X-ray of the lungs. His grew from 3.8 to 5.2 in 18 months which warranted surgery. My daughter who is 28 was recently diagnosed with a AAA and s brain aneurysm. We were told by Dr Deeb, U of M, it's familial. We believe this as well. He was the only professional to give us a thorough explanation. And he was my husbands original thoracic surgeon. He also warned us of my other two daughters to get checked, 50% chance. More. I have several auto immunes that cold play a factor in her diagnosis. What have you found out? I still can't think about it. And she is so scared. Hers is 4.2. Thank you.
    • lorraine1950
      lorraine1950 diane35061

      Posted

      hi, diane, there is a reason, that i'm feeling doomed..... when we first found out of my husbands aorta aneurysm, the size was, i think 3.2.... the doctor at the time, told us both there was nothing that could be done... my husband smokes, has high blood pressure, and is over weight... 3 things against him. the doctor at the time we were in the office told both of us, that he would most likely die on the operating table.... that was 6 months ago... since then it has grown, to 4. 2... i don't let him lift anything.... i worry about him all the time.... i'm scared of losing him.....he is going back for another test, to see if the aneurysm is any bigger, but not, he's talking about having the operation, which scares me to death. i feel so helpless.. the children are worried sick.. the've been comming over trying to help, anyway they can...... i just don't know what to do, to help him.
  • sharon16186
    sharon16186 Guest

    Posted

    I'm so sorry about your mum . I understand your pain as my mum died on Monday 22.6.2015 and I've come across this sight trying to make sence of it all .she went in for a uti and died in minutes . she had some back pain but she has had that for years due to spine probs . She had high blood pressure and that's all . what a shock I can't believe it either . and I just found out my grandmother died same way though a family member . I wonder why she wasn't checked ? Nothing could be done for my mother either , we were taking her home she put her shoes on and just fell back on her chair went white and died . She was my everything too . !!
  • Hayley1903
    Hayley1903 Guest

    Posted

    Sharon - my mom died June 22 2015 as well from an Aortic Aneurysm.  This was sdden and a complete shock to us.  She was 61 years old and healthy.  Had controlled High Blood Pressure.  The Thursday prior she started having back pain and threw up her food a couple times.  She went tot he hospital on Sun June 21 and was diagnosed with a pulled muscle in her back.  I went to her house the next morning at 11am to take care of her for the day.  We talked and hung out for a bit and she just wanted to sleep.  I went back upstairs 20 mins later as she sounded in pain and give her some pain medicine.  We talked for a few mins and then she died with me in aboout 5 mins.  I called 911 but it all happened so quickly.  She didnt even know she had an aneurysm, we were told that after she had passed.

  • carol87726
    carol87726 Guest

    Posted

    Hi I'm so sorry to hear about your mum but I have only just read your letter .my mum has just been diagnosed with an aorta anyorisum and we have been told hers is at 12cm and there is nothing they can do for her .we have been told it's just a waiting game could be now could be years away but they can't do anything for her .which is so upsetting read up on what to look out for for the dreaded day arriving but this is no help we've even been told if she does make it to the hospital they won't be able to do anything only make her comfortable . It's so awful knowing we can't do anything to stop it from happening .its such an horrible thing to know .but my sympathy goes out to all that this has already happened too .
    • BillyFriend
      BillyFriend carol87726

      Posted

      carol87726, Have you had a second opinion about your mum?

      I had an 11cm TAA removed. Utilmately it was a case of going for the op, or probably not surviving more than a few days in my case.

      I don't know the complexity of your mum's AA or her age, but on size alone its not a forgon conclusion.

      It's a very emotional situation you and your mum are in, but we are all here to help with advice and experiences if you need us.

       

    • glenys09123
      glenys09123 carol87726

      Posted

      Hi My Mum was diagnosed with a aortic dissection type a threee weeks ago , we were told that she would probably not last two weeks !!! It is so hard never knowing if it the last time you will see her alive or not. I have taken six weeks off work to spend as much time with her as I can. The doctors said because of her age and as she has alzhiemers they would not attempt to operate. I see her every day and am seeing signs of the end , the breathlessness the poor circulation in her feet and hands, the light headiness etc. It is so hard to watch , but she is happy and is unaware how sick she really is , thankfully xx
  • Gate_Keeper
    Gate_Keeper Guest

    Posted

    What a sad story to read and a terrible shock for you and your family. You must have a hundred and one things to do. Please do look after yourself and when time allows, please make an appointment with your family Doctor to get yourself scanned for an aneurysm, as a precaution.

    Sadly I lost my mother from a rupture abdominal aneurysm, even though she was in hospital at the time being investigated for constipation, it was missed. I had a scan and was diagnosed with an abdominal aneurysm, which is being monitored.

    Please accept my condolences, RIP

    • maximo_jr.21795
      maximo_jr.21795 Gate_Keeper

      Posted

      Hi Guys! I have Thoracic Aortic Aneurysm also,last March 2015 its size was 4.6 cm. My cardiologist advised me to have open heart surgery. But due to financial difficulties I don't have my surgery done until now. Sad to say,medical expenses in the Philippines is too expensive. Where less fortunate people could hardly afford for hospitalisation. Right now,I'm so scared. I'm having palpitations frequently, my back is painful as well. Aneurysm took my father's life 10 years ago. And now I fear for my own life as well.
    • Gate_Keeper
      Gate_Keeper maximo_jr.21795

      Posted

      All of us with an aneurysm have to live with that fear, either up front and talking about it, or we keep that fear locked up somewhere in our mind where it does us no harm and we try to get on with our lives (in theory). I worked in the NHS for 30+ years and when people first receive a big diagnosis they react in 2 ways: throw in the towel or fight, fight, fight. You might not agree. It took me a while to get my head around the diagnosis of an infra renal abdominal aortic aneurysm and it is very scary. Then recently diagnosed, I had new blood clots in my leg with new aneurysm behind the knee.

      Fear itself and the anxiety that goes with it, is just as bad - can even be worse than the disease. If it helps, do keep posting. We can't do anything about the health care in the Phillipines, but we can try and understand what you are going through. Have you talked to anyone local about your feelings and situation?

    • maximo_jr.21795
      maximo_jr.21795 Gate_Keeper

      Posted

      Hi Gate Keeper,

      Thanks for your kind words. I do talk about it,even to my employer. But unfortunately it doesn't help. Adding insult to injury,they terminated me due to my condition. Which really adds to my depression. Now, I only discuss it to my family and few trusted friends. Yeah,you're right, anxiety and depression is dangerous than the disease itself,that's why I try to shake it off my head. And enjoy the remaining days of my life and try to find another job in order for me to raise money for my open heart surgery.

      I have blood clots in my left leg as well and a huge lump in my left armpit. But I'm not sure if it is associated with my Thoracic Aortic Aneurysm.

      I've been searching in facebook and twitter for a page or support for people with aneurysm. Sad to say there's none.

    • Gate_Keeper
      Gate_Keeper maximo_jr.21795

      Posted

      Thanks Maximo

      By coincidence, I had a private job caring for ex-offenders with mental illness and addictions, which I had to give up when the aneurysm was diagnosed, as I had been assaulted and punched in the stomach on more than one occasion and it was too risky to do that work. You get to know your true friends when you have something bad or go wrong in your life. I am sorry to hear about your clots and troubled. Do your best to stay motivated, as those who are always complaining, have a hard job of pulling themselves out from the "if it goes wrong, it is because it is meant to" - the self fulfilling prophecy thing.

      When I am well, I spend some of my time in East Africa which also does not have a free health care system. When people need treatment or operations, family and friends raise money through fund raising events / charity to pay for their hospital costs, even if it takes years to pay back the debt or they get a loan from the church or through the elders of the village.... Just a few thoughts ....

    • maximo_jr.21795
      maximo_jr.21795 Gate_Keeper

      Posted

      Thanks for the thought Gate Keeper, I've tried to communicate with my relatives here and abroad,few have responded and extend their help. Yet it is not enough for the operation. For now, I shook my illness off my head and try to enjoy life. Helping other people in need. At least I live a meaningful life helping others and making difference of those less fortunate people,(less fortunate than me). Our lives here are all temporary. What matters to me now is not how long I live, but how I make use of my remaining days.
    • Gate_Keeper
      Gate_Keeper maximo_jr.21795

      Posted

      It looks as though Maximo, you are trying to do your best to help yourself, even though life is difficult for you. So what are the alternatives to surgery?

      We all have to watch our weight by trying to keep it under control. This helps by keeping blood pressure down, with less strain on the aneurysm. Avoid dangerous activities such as bungee jumping, climbing ladders, lifting heavy weights, stop smoking? Not to waste any money on voodoo cures. I have seen it happen when people are desperate, they become vulnerable to these quacks. 

      Last night, I faltered and did not sleep worrying about my bad leg and wondering if it will need to be amputated if the gangrene sets in. I must learn to take a spoon of my own advice and medicine, not worry so much. 

    • maximo_jr.21795
      maximo_jr.21795 Gate_Keeper

      Posted

      Gate Keeper, for now I opt for alternative herbal medicines and it helps in controlling my blood pressure. My form of exercise is walking. No lifting heavy weights and I refrain from eating oily and fatty foods.

      I hope your gangrene will not lead to leg amputation. Try to have fruit shake as well. Everyday,my meal is composed of vegetables and fresh fruit shake without sugar. I'm praying for miracle for both of us. Keep posted friend.

    • sec2709
      sec2709 maximo_jr.21795

      Posted

      Check out FB Aorta Dissection Support Group.  It is all with people who have these aneurysms.  I''m gaining information from this discussion and the FB page......we're in a group that walks around with a ticking time bomb.  I don't agree with the doctors on waiting for surgery, but that is obviusly the standard from the industry.  Good luck and sending prayers your way.

       

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