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I'm having a very bad time. My mom is very sick and dieing, I don't think she will be with me for much longer, this is very hard for me. My anxiety since she got sick has been very heightened. I try tell myself she could be with us for another year, but I know in my heart it wont happen. I have a very hard time with death and I've been thru alot of it in the past 1.5 years. I think I'm handling it but all I do is push it back down inside. I've also been having medical issues myself, been having so much dizziness for the past 9 months, it feels like I'm rocking/swaying and when I walk sometimes the floor is bouncing, my ENT thinks it migraine associated vertigo and my thyriod meds have been going up and down for months, so I'm constantly worried that i'm dieing myself. but in the past few months I've been constantly anxious, in the past week I've taken my xanax every day, I try to only take 1/2 of the .25mg but somedays I take the whole pill and then I worry about getting addicted to it. I know its not much but still worry. I beleive I'm also having depression about all of this. I can't get in to see the psychologist until the end of May, so I'm trying to cope and its hard. I think there is just to much going on. I spend a lot of time now because of this wondering if its going to coz me to have a heart attack, because of the stress and anxiety. My symptoms now are nervousness thru my entire body, lightheaded, chills, increases sweating with my hot flashes, I'm also post menapausal, legs and back ache, headaches, tightening shoulders and neck pain, worry every minute of the day, can't concentrate, can't remember things, shaking, heart pounding every morning when I wake up, constant checking everything on my body. Since this vertigo started I spend every waking moment looking for what it is and why I have it. I'm obsessed with it now and with my mom being sick all the time, the anxiety is much worse.
I have an appt on Monday with my GP about this to see if he thinks I need meds. I hate taking them, everytime I try I have awful side effects and they scared me to death. So I opted to go back to therapy but have to wait for it.
I'm curious does any here have constant fear and anxiety 24/7 every day and worry whats it doing to you?
Thanks for listening.
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