1. Community
  2. Bones, joints and muscles
  3. Osteoarthritis

My mum has osteoarthritis and has done for many years, i'm looking for some insight from others.

Posted , 5 users are following.

hannah24935
hannah24935

My mum has had this condition for many years, she has put on weight,had to leave work as it was a physically demanding job with little support, shes in alot of pain 9 times out of 10,she often has side effects from the medication, shes always sweating, she very rarely leaves the house as shes always in so much pain and is becoming more depressed.  Her doctors don't seem to be doing what they need to do, I understand the pressures that GP's are under but it breaks my heart hearing how much my mum is suffering.  I live 300 miles away so I can't help as much as I would.  My mum does not know what to do or where to turn, shes almost convinced herself that this will never get better.  Any advice from any of you that have this illness would be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance.

4 likes, 11 replies

11 Replies

  • catsmother
    catsmother hannah24935

    Posted

    Hello Hannah,

     How awful for your mum and for you who live so far from her too.

     I understand completely how your mum feels, I too put on lots of weight, through the OA and Reynards in my feet, I cannot stand or walk for long, going upstairs feels like I'm climbing a mountain, extremely painful, I don't take  medication for the OA I only take medication for my overactive thyroid.

    Not here to talk about me though, I wonder if your mum could find someone close by who has the same condition?  Just to tak to others helps, I know it can't change her pain but, talking does help you realize you're not alone and other's suffer in the same way.

     Could she join us on this site?  It really does help all of us, even if there's nothing physical we can do, we can understand and support each other, and we know we're not alone, that helps such a lot.

     I would think you will have people on here who can advise with medication, what they take and how it is for them, I'm sorry I can't do that.

     I just wanted to let you know that I do feel for your mum and for you, you seem like a good daughter, I'm sure your mum appreciates your love.

    I hope you get a postive feedback on this for you and your mum.

     God bless.

     Chrissie

     

    • hannah24935
      hannah24935 catsmother

      Posted

      Thank you Chrissie for responding.  I think joining a support group will help her understand she is not the only one who suffers.  I think she does often feel she is alone and the only one going through this.  I understand the pain element as I had Gullain Barre and spent 5 months on ICU 10yrs ago, meaning I often struggle with nerve pain and weakness in my limbs. Sorry to hear about how you struggle, hopefully one day they will discover a treatment that works well and gives you all a better way of life.

      Take care and thank you for your kind words x

    • catsmother
      catsmother hannah24935

      Posted

      You and your mum are welcome to my kind words Hannah, I know exactly how your mum and you are feeling.

       My best wishes are with you both.

       I thank you too for your kind words, it would be lovely if a cure could be found, who knows?  Hopefully, one day..how nice that would be for lots of people.

       Sorry to hear you struggle with nerve pain and weakness in your limbs, it's tough when we have lots of pain and struggles, 5 months is a very long time to be on ICU!!   That must have been dreadful?

      Only people who have the same or similar conditions can fully understand.

       It would be good if one day soon we hear from your mum, there would be lots of support and freindship for her here, no matter how far away we live from one another, there is a bond that holds us together, we can moan, laugh, cry...no-one judges on here, I've found that out...it's good to know biggrin

       For now, please take care and maybe speak again.

       Love,

       Chrissie.xx

       

    • loxie
      loxie hannah24935

      Posted

      Hi again Hannah.  You're so right about feeling alone, constant pain is very isolating.  It's hard to be sociable or even pleasant tempered at times and I do know how easy it is to just want to shut yourself away and left in peace.  Also pain is a very personal thing, how it affects someone is different to each individual - it's so hard to relate to others' pain.  She most certainly isn't alone, as you can see from these forums - to be honest that on its own gave me hope, seeing how those in much worse condition and pain than me were coping, made me feel a whole lot better about my own situation.  Visiting the doctor with her sounds a great idea, that's a big commitment for you living so far away and with your own busy family life to contend with but I'm sure you'll get more info that way.  As a sufferer, me the patient often just forgets to ask the right questions and I get tongue tied trying to explain it all in the short appointment time.  I took a good friend with me to one appointment, the doctor wasn't happy about someone else being there but they managed to ask questions in an unemotional way and got far better disclosure from the doctor than I ever do.  Pain makes me short tempered and when I get frustrated with the doctor I just end up getting grumpy and give up.  Find out from your mum exactly when her pain is at its worst, what meds do and dont help and specifically which ones upset her and make her unwell, then insist the doctors take account of all that info and offer better options.  They all have 'go to' lists of meds as first port of call and if a patient doesn't complain, they'll assume everything is fine and tick a box.  I'm always reminded of the saying 'a squeaky hinge gets oiled' - ie if you tell them you're not satisfied and keeping pushing for better help, you go to the top of their must get sorted list.  Good luck hon and tell your mum to keep reading these forums, there's an amazing group of so helpful and lovely people on here. xx
  • loxie
    loxie hannah24935

    Posted

    So sorry to hear of your mother's issues Hannah.  Pain is hateful, I too have OA and the fatigue from the actual disease coupled with the weariness of being in constant pain just make everything an uphill battle.  Weight gain is something that often happens, both because of not being able to exercise effectively but also because of reactions to medication etc.  Losing weight is of ENORMOUS benefit to OA sufferers, partly because of less load bearing on joints etc but also because fatty deposits within the body will actually add to the inflammation and pain levels.  I had a bit of a determination effort last year and managed to motivate myself to lose about a stone (14lbs) and my mobility was really improved and the pain levels went down a good few notches.  Over Christmas I was weak willed and stuffed junk and drank lots and have put it back on and now I'm suffering again - self imposed I know but that doesn't stop it upsetting me.  I've found a few natural remedies that really do help with the inflammation and pain - fresh ginger (either grate into hot water and drink as a tea, with lemon or mashed up and mixed with body lotion or oil and massaged into the joints).  Turmeric - google the effective ingredient and look for supplements with a high content of this.  Turmeric the spice only has a small amount of the required substance so you're better off finding a supplement with it in rather than increasing the amount of turmeric you eat.  It's very difficult when you're immobilised due to inflammation and pain but again exercise is the best medecine, even gentle movement will increase endorphins and they are excellent painkillers.  Swimming, yoga (there are specialist sessions for those with reduced ability), chi gung, etc.  As catsmother has posted, being on a forum like this along with other people who've got similar issues has been a real life saver for me.  
    • hannah24935
      hannah24935 loxie

      Posted

      Thanks for your lovely message, I have copied all of them and sent them to my mum for her to see there is support and ways of improving daily life.  I to take tumeric as my husband and I read up about the benefits of taking it so bought some from Holland and Barratt.  I do encourage her to excercise, don't get me wrong she does try and keep herself mobile but some weeks she stays in bed with the pain.  I have spoken with her today and told her about all of the lovely comments, and how all of you would recommend her using the forum for support and advice so hopefully she will be on here soon.  Thanks again Loxie and good luck with your future and health x
  • julie53120
    julie53120 hannah24935

    Posted

    Hi Hannah

    So sorry to hear about your mum, she's very lucky to have a daughter like you.

    Is is possible for you to arrange an appointment with your mum and go with her to see her doctor, because I feel sometimes the doctors think we are just moaning for some attention. When you feel down and depressed you can't be bothered to argue and do just as the doctor says, I know I have been there. Best of luck and get your mum to join, I am quite new and have found it helpful to know I'm not the

    only one.

    • hannah24935
      hannah24935 julie53120

      Posted

      Hi Julie, I doubt I would get very far on the telephone to the doctors, I will probably visit at easter so will look at making her an apointment and going with her. Thanks for the lovely comment you made, it just makes me sad I can't do more, living 4hrs away and having 3 children in school it's not as easy to visit.  Good luck with everything Julie and thanks again x
Back to top

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the community to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the community are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the community is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.